Admin

Attackers Never Say "Put 'em Up"

By
Managing Real Estate Broker with Howard Hanna Rand Realty License # 49FA1074963

Martha Brown has written a nice posting on a self defense class she took, and I have to say that, all things being equal, taking the course is better than not taking it. This is not a rebuttal, but something I wish to add, since real estate agents do get attacked, and, sadly, killed in our line of work.  

Disclosure: I was assaulted by a client in 1998 when I was 31 and in good shape. I was a 4 year varsity wrestler. It did me no good. My attacker was an ex-cop it later turned out.

Disclosure: My college roommate and former co worker at my first brokerage is a black belt in Tae-Kwon-Do and was nearly killed in his own office. He required plastic surgery after that attack. 

These attacks did not occur in dark alleys, open houses in obscure locations, or in abandoned homes on the wrong side of town. I was attacked in the client's kitchen while his wife looked on, taunting me. My friend was attacked in his office. Interestingly, we are both male, in decent shape, and do not fit the profile of the news stories about female agents being accosted at open houses. 

Beating up your attacker is not plan A. If you can defend yourself, do so to the extent to get away. Think Edith Bunker when she thwarted that would be rapist. But if you fight, you are engaging someone in their turf; they were ready- you weren't. And the element of surprise is lethal.  

Prevention is more important than reaction. Don't be alone with people you haven't vetted. Don't do open houses alone with no backup. Casually remark that you expect a male associate any minute. 

Hand to hand combat has problems. Here's the thing: Attackers sucker punch. Attackers rely on the element of surprise. Attackers are con artists who will go out of their way to make you feel comfortable. Attackers wait until you turn your eye away. Then, they'll hit you hard, fast, low, and repeatedly. That's the problem. They play dirty. They never tell you to put up your dukes. They rig it to their favor. Sharks, for example, don't attack on land, where they aren't very tough. They get you in the water. Don't go "in the water." 

If there is going to be a battle, make it a battle of wits. You can win that one. If you are alone in a house with someone who makes you uncomfortable, say "Greg Nino will be here any minute with that survey I forgot on my desk," or "Jeff Belonger is running late but he has some great financing programs for this house." Then, get on the phone and call Greg and Jeff and say "Hi, I am at our open at 927 Elm, there is a man here who really want to see that floor plan/mortgage/survey." They'll get the message. If I got that call from one of my team I'd send Cavelleria Siciliana

There are tons of things you can do to avoid a scrap. Get names. Get numbers. Verify. Let people know where you are at all times. Work as a team. Carry mace or pepper spray. Keep your eyes open and keep your distance. Never be alone with an unknown out of distance from civilization. Casually mention that others are on their way. But it is prevention, not a good left hook, that is the best deterrent to being harmed. 

 

Posted by

______________________________________________________________________________

All content/images, unless noted, are the property of J. Philip Faranda & may not be used without permission

Comments(6)

Show All Comments Sort:
Craig Richardson
National Realty - McLean, VA

Philip, good info, thanks for the post.  It's unfortunate but a necessity I guess.

Mar 11, 2010 02:12 AM
Terry McCarley
Coastal Real Estate - Cape Coral FL - Cape Coral, FL
REALTOR, SRES, CDPE - Cape Coral, FL

Great post Philip...this can be a very dangerous business and all real estate agents (male and female) should be very careful.

Mar 11, 2010 02:21 AM
Melina Tomson
Tomson Burnham, llc Licensed in the State of Oregon - Salem, OR
Principal Broker/Owner, M.S.

I totally agree.  You goal is escape not defense.  I know when I worked in a group home with troubled teens they talked a lot about the element of surprise.  It takes most people a bit to get reoriented and in that time you've been punched or kicked several times.

I went through a really basic self defense class a few years ago and it really should have been called self escape class.  It was all about doing the unexpected when attacked in order to surprise your attacker and gain a few seconds for escape.  I think sometimes the problem with self defense classes is that it can give someome the impression that they can fight when they really just need to high tail it out of there before something happens.  NO business is worth it.

Me.  I listen to my hibbie jeebie meter.  I don't work with people that trigger my meter. 

 

Mar 11, 2010 02:45 AM
Bob Willis
Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices California Properties - Orange, CA
Orange County & L.A. County Senior Home Advisor

Good post.  I agree.  It is better to avoid the confrontation.  I have experienced a couple of bad situations at open houses, but luckily, noone was injured.  One crazy man who threatened to take me down actually ended up missing a couple of weeks later.  I suspect that he finally came across someone who was not intimidated by him and who killed him and buried the body where it couldn't be found.  There are a lot of dangerous and crazy people out there.  Be aware and trust your instincts.  Make sure you always have a clear exit.

Mar 11, 2010 02:55 AM
Laura Cerrano
Feng Shui Manhattan Long Island - Locust Valley, NY
Certified Feng Shui Expert, Speaker & Researcher

Phil, I read Martha's post and now this....anything that helps is a wonderful thing!  I see some Real Estate Agents who work alone and I don't at all blame them for being a bit edgy....and actually have a plan in place for our consultations so we keep in touch.

Mar 11, 2010 09:03 AM
Barb Szabo, CRS
RE/MAX Above & Beyond - Cleveland, OH
E-pro Realtor, Cleveland Ohio Homes

It's one of the reasons I don't like open houses. First of all we advertise all over the net that we are there, at certain hours, and probably alone. It's an open invitation. This really is an excellent article with some very sound advice.

Mar 11, 2010 11:41 AM