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New Underwriting Updates - Or I think this is the direction we're going....

By
Real Estate Agent with John L. Scott Medford

I recieved this from one of my trusted Loan Officers... ENJOY

NEW UNDERWRITING UPDATES:

All borrowers' birth certificates will be required with pictures taken in the hospital with medical staff. Birth certificate with a live home delivery will not be eligible for first time home buyers.

Marriage certificate and photographs with bridal dress will be required if both husband and wife are required to qualify for the loan.

GFE will not require signature, but will require blood sampling from a recognized institution within three days of application.

DNA test will be performed at closing to avoid any non-arms length transactions. Loan funding will be contingent upon satisfactory receipt of DNA results.

Verification of deposit will be acceptable only if Bank representative is present at the closing.

Copy of Pay stubs and W2 will only be acceptable through IRS and only with a wax-sealed envelope mailed directly to the lender.

Seven witnesses from the neighborhood will be required as proof of primary residence in case borrower owns more than 1 property.

All appraisers will be required to use masks and ear plugs at the time of inspection to avoid any personal influence by the borrower or broker for the appraised value.

In order to correctly calculate DTI and true housing ratio, a list of grocery items, monthly usage and brand names will be required with receipts and projected 12 month consumption chart.

Closing will not occur without loan officer presence at settlement and loan officer picture will be taken at the closing in a mug shot format with loan number. Picture should meet standard guideline of 2 X 2 inch in color format with one facing and one side view.

Loan officer picture will be attached to the Deed and note and will be made available for general public and security agencies in case borrower defaults on the loan

Comments(6)

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John Ryan
Century 21 Alliance - Havertown, PA

That is too funny! 

Wouldn't it be nice if they could just read between the lines.  Tell me you didn't sit at a settlement table in 2005-2007 and say to yourself at some point, "How the hell did this person get a mortgage?"

Mar 12, 2010 10:59 AM
Pat Champion
John Roberts Realty - Eustis, FL
Call the "CHAMPION" for all your real estate needs

This is funny but it could very well be the direction we are heading in today's market. Thanks for sharing.

Mar 12, 2010 10:59 AM
Stephanie Reynolds
Integrity First Financial Group, Inc. - Santee, CA
East County San Diego Homes 619-838-4408

Wow-sounds like things are finally heading in the right direction. I thought we would never get relief from today's strict guidelines! (he he he)

Mar 12, 2010 11:14 AM
Richard Glesser
North Country Appraisal Services - Gaylord, MI

And it could all be eliminated if lenders hired intelligent people as underwriters instead of those unable to secure employment at Burger King.

Mar 12, 2010 02:19 PM
Geoff ONeill
John L. Scott Medford - Medford, OR

Maybe he was insinuating that someone in the pipeline was telling a "Whopper". :-)

Mar 13, 2010 01:36 AM
Richard Glesser
North Country Appraisal Services - Gaylord, MI

Russel, Jeff - Didn't mean to slight Burger KIng.  Just picking what many would call entry level employment.  Any such business could be inserted.  Unfortunately, it appears the intelligence level of many underwriters would not meet the minimum required by these businesses.

Mar 14, 2010 03:35 AM