Every once in a while I have the great pleasure of meeting with an agent who completely exudes integrity and with almost no effort at all starts to infect everyone around them with it. Even with a great deal of experience in business and in executive positions I find myself drawn to these people in a very tangible way. You see, it's not about how many years they're in the business and it's not about how many transactions they've done or have on the board this month, it's not about how well they can brag, puff up or otherwise exaggerate accomplishments to as to keep up the pretense that they are far superior to the people they are addressing. Integrity does not exist in "experience" but in "essence"; it's a core value stemming from our intrinsic sense of right and wrong and manifests itself in our behavior yet is noticeable via the eyes or the smile of the bearer.
Another critical and noticeable characteristic is authenticity. There's no fooling the masses when you're not operating with integrity. Those who are true to themselves and their customers who have been infected with; and infect others with integrity can smell a rat a mile away. So, what does it really mean to be infected with integrity and if you don't have it how can you get it.
Well, I'd need to write a book, not a blog to answer that in a manner that will do the subject justice but for the purpose of this blog I'd like to share some practical advice of what you can and/or should do to get this most desirable infection. Keep in mind that integrity doesn't just show up, it's not a pill you can take or an experience you can have at a motivational meeting and take home with you; it doesn't fit in a briefcase and it certainly doesn't come without practice and deliberate intent.
The good news is if you're reading this and you feel that you're integrity is not all it can be and you're not performing at your highest moral level, serving your clients like you know you should and can nor behaving both in public and/or private in a manner that brings you the admiration and respect of others that you can; if you work at it develop the characteristics that lead to rock solid integrity. In fact, some of the people I know who are highly respected and thought of as "integrity moguls" were not so in their younger years.
So, here are some observations I've had over the years from people who made a 180 degree turn and become highly respected agents/people/friends/parents and so on. Some of the below may be a little more blunt than I'd really like to present it however I'm know for getting to the point quickly and am only writing a blog, not a book!
•1. Change your input - If you're wasting time on less than honorable reading, TV shows, movies or other huge time wasters of bad or foolhardy information just cut it out of your input diet. You can't be a buffoon at night and a professional during the day if you're not expanding your horizons at every opportunity. Put into your head that which you'll be proud of when it comes out; if you're ashamed or embarrassed you need to change that input.
•2. And this is HUGE... You may need to change your friends. I know, I know; now I'm getting too personal but integrity is personal, it's one of our most personal innermost traits and either we work at it or we don't. The people you may be spending time with can destroy everything you put into building your integrity and/or the way others perceive you and your ethics and honesty. Think about it; how many times have to talked to someone about stupid things they've done and they immediately say "I was running with the wrong crowd" or "I got mixed up with the wrong crowd"? The people you hang around with rub off on you and so does their idea of what integrity is and the next thing you know you're them and not you any more.
•3. Find a mentor - If you don't have someone you want to emulate find one, if you don't know anyone after deep thought and consideration see number 2 above. I have mentors, a few of them; two in real estate, one in the church, one in the gym and each one of them brings some form of integrity to the table and upon the final analysis they have a lot to offer to anyone willing to be honest with them and willing to learn. Funny thing is that many of these people are not only willing to share with others, many of them are just waiting for the next person to latch on to them and learn what they have to offer. Find a mentor that has unshakable integrity and take very good mental notes of how they handle their day to day affairs, realtors, both big and small problems and challenges. It's quite the awesome sight to see someone with a highly developed level of integrity in action and it's even more awesome to begin to emulate them.
•4. Be willing to change and learn - If you're not willing to admit you need to improve your current level of integrity or you're not held in high esteem by those you respect you're going to be a terrible student and should get used to not accomplishing the goals you only go after with half efforts. Be honest with yourself, evaluate who you really are and be willing to ask for help and more importantly to receive that help and put it into practice.
As I said earlier; truly doing justice to this subject would take a book, not a blog. I'm inspired to write this today because I spent a few hours with one of these awesome people and even in our short meeting of a few hours it was so obvious why everyone who knows this person has nothing but praise and good things to say. I have a feeling that if this person had a need that many people would try to help simply because they would want the help in return if it was them; especially from this individual.
I would like to encourage you to take a good hard look at yourself and be honest about what you find. Know that with a little effort, a few small changes and a mentor you can become the person you so desperately want to be when it comes to integrity. It's never too late to make a positive change and to grow; you can do it and there are people willing to help. Ask!
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