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'My LIFE!, By DESIGN' with Sandra Corrigan-What Is At Risk to.........?

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Real Estate Broker/Owner with CEO/Owner/Team Leader/Keller Williams Executives Realty LLC

'My LIFE!, By DESIGN' with Sandra Corrigan-What is at Risk to.........?

Tom Ferry's new book, 'Life By Design',  is full of great exercises for personal and professional growth. 

At times in my life I have sensed that there was something that was going on that i could not quite see or put my finger on, a kind of 6th sense in knowing something is not right and it might have something to do with me.

My husband Thom will ask me , "What is at risk for you to...........?" What is at risk for me to deal with a conflict, say what is on my mind, make a change in an area? I hate that question sometimes. This question pricks and pokes holes in the shadows of the false reality that I am hiding in. I find that the thing I have not wanted to face, when faced, sets me free to live differently and changes the relationship that I have with others and myself. The true reality creates real and lasting change and allows me to create a Life By Design, instead of a life by default.

One Life by Design exercise is to ask 5 people; 1. What do you admire about me? 2. What do you see that I do that really works for me? 3. What actions do you see that I do that don't really work for me? .

I chose to do this exercise and chose a friend I knew would tell me the absolute truth. I was nervous. I knew that the conversation could be life changing. My friend said great things about my leadership, talent and skills. Yet what I knew that I was looking for was someone who had the courage to help me open the door to a blind spot in an area of my life. I was really seeking to have a Life by Design for me, Sandra Corrigan, a life I designed.

We came to the third question, What actions do you see that don't really work for me?  and the space between us suddenly got very small. She looked me in the eye and said, "You come across as cold and unapproachable." What! You have got to be kidding! Tell me what you mean?" I asked. "Please paint me a picture of what that looks like so I can understand how I do that?"  As we talked (and I cried) I felt the kindness and love of my friend sharing the path to a better me that day. Honesty and truth, shared in a relationship of grace, love and trust set me free to not take myself so seriously and to let others in.

We all want a Life by Design.  We hunger for a life of dreams realized, great friends and relationships. meaningful work and personal and spiritual growth. And so my question to you is, What is at risk for you to ask those questions? The answer is maybe...... everything!

 


Tom Ferry: LIFE! By DESIGNThis post is to help promote Tom Ferry's upcoming book, LIFE! By DESIGN. The contents of my post are the result of some self reflection the preview chapter of the book asks us to do about ourselves.

You can Pre-Order the book now by visiting TomFerryBook.com. You can also participate in the promotion being done by ActiveRain for a chance to win some great prizes and 2500 points by visiting the promotional post here.

Everyone that orders a copy of the book between now and April 23rd, 2010 will also receive one ticket to attend Tom's Success Summit, August 24-26th and the MP3 audio role play program: Objection Handling for Buyers, Sellers and Short Sales.

In exchange for writing this post, I could win an iPad or other cool prizes, and this is to let you know so the FTC doesn't fine me.

Show All Comments Sort:
Sally Dunbar
Lyon Real Estate, Fair Oaks CA (Sacramento Area) - Fair Oaks, CA
Fair Oaks Realtor - Fair Oaks Homes for Sale

What an amazing friend to be willing to  tell you that.  and how brave of you to be willing to ask her.

Apr 22, 2010 03:08 AM
Anonymous
Thom Corrigan

Great blog Sandy! I did this by mail (in 1983) to 100 friends, family, coworkers, vendors that I had a current relationship with. THe feedback I recived was astounding! I kept all the responses I got and review them every couple years to see if I have "improved" any. It was a good yeardstick!

Apr 22, 2010 03:22 AM
#2
Anonymous
Thom Corrigan

Great blog Sandy! I did this by mail (in 1983) to 100 friends, family, coworkers, vendors that I had a current relationship with. THe feedback I recived was astounding! I kept all the responses I got and review them every couple years to see if I have "improved" any. It was a good yeardstick!

Apr 22, 2010 03:22 AM
#3
Lisa Hill
Florida Property Experts - Daytona Beach, FL
Daytona Beach Real Estate

Ouch! I've actually be told almost the same thing in the past. But I already knew it. I keep people at arm's length until I decide if I can trust them. Therefore, in the beginning, I can come across as, well, I don't use the word that was actually used to describe me ;-)  So yep. I'm still working on my trust issues! Being open is hard! I feel for you. If you're about to take on the internal change that goes with that comment, it's a long, uphill battle, which requires lots of prayer. Let me know if you need extra prayer! I'm good for that part =)

Apr 22, 2010 09:52 AM
Ruth Vogt
Fairway Independent Mortgage, LLS. Equal Housing Opportunity. Regulated by the Division of Real Estate. - Colorado Springs, CO
719-592-0855 www.ReverseLoansInColorado.com

Sandy, What a very brave woman you are, indeed! I skipped that exercise specifically because I know how much time it would take me to process comments just like the one you received. Now you're making me feel guilty. So, I'll probably go back and look at the exercise again!

Apr 22, 2010 04:08 PM
Ruth Vogt
Fairway Independent Mortgage, LLS. Equal Housing Opportunity. Regulated by the Division of Real Estate. - Colorado Springs, CO
719-592-0855 www.ReverseLoansInColorado.com

PS: I, for one, don't think you are cold and unapproachable for whatever that is worth. Quite the opposite, actually. You have such strong professional presence that it is a relief to discover when talking with you how open and warm you actually are.

Apr 22, 2010 04:20 PM
Anonymous
Becky Fox

Sandy, I'm proud of you for not only reading the book but following through on this exercise and then being vulnerable by writing about your experience.  It is someone who truly desires to be a better person in all areas of her life that receives the responses in humility, learns from them and takes action.  I'm excited for you!

Apr 26, 2010 03:20 PM
#7
Anonymous
Barbara Donahue

Sandy,

I'm thankful for you in my life.  Everyday I learn another way to improve myself by watching you.  I will have to try this one! 

Apr 27, 2010 01:51 PM
#8
Anonymous
Murcury

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Sep 11, 2011 01:11 AM
#9
Anonymous
Murcury

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#10
Anonymous
Murcury

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