Are Mortgages like Marriage Vows?

Real Estate Agent with RI Real Estate Services ~ 401-529-7849~ RI Waterfront Real Estate

Marriage Vows


Just like marriage vows, mortgage holders need help along the way with arbitration, negotiation, remediation, modification and sometimes divorce or closure...sometimes the mortgage holder will also 'stick it out' to the final end to no avail. Tell me are mortgages like marriage vows?

So frustrating to me to try to help someone along in this process
and not have the homeowners heed any advice as the bank gives them the 30 day notice to vacate the property.  I can look back over time when I offered a home for sale at a fair price and 3 weeks later someone talks to the homeowner and said it was way under priced.  I get a call to raise the price by $60,000 from the seller - argument ensued & the price went up.  It sat for 6 months with no showings.  Hmm, the homeowner could not admit he was wrong.  One offer prior to this price increase which would have been an acceptable offer but the owners refuse it.

Now we are down this twisted and dangerous marriage/mortgage road of difficult times and unresolved monetary issues...i stay the course because I knew I could get the homeowners out if they would just allow me to.  Also, I had a personal connection with one of the homeowners and felt an obligation.  However, just like a divorce when one party does not want it and hangs on...this is the path they chose to take. 

No counseling whether legal or financial to understand the economic strains this brought upon their lives were they open to.  So the local bank tells them if they get a co-signer on the mortgage or get 'room mates' and can make up the past payments and stay current the homeowners will not be foreclosed on.  Isn't this just a bad mortgage vow heading down to divorce?  The bank sees it coming but is enabling and prolonging the inevitable.  So just like marriage vows some mortgages just don't make the long term payoff...tell me are mortgages like marriage vows?

If you live in Rhode Island and have questions about the short sale process, please give me a call.


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This blog © and its contents is original to Ginny Lacey Gorman

the RI waterfront Realtor of Choice


Ginny L. Gorman, a purveyor of Fine RI Waterfront Real Estate   

Specializing in waterfront, ocean front, vacation, coastal and luxury homes for sale in North Kingstown, South Kingstown, Narragansett, Jamestown, Charlestown, East Greenwich, Exeter, West Greenwich RI and beyond ...  I sell dreams!  Because there is no place like home...the RI Real Estate Agent in the Sparkly Red Shoes.


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Don Sabinske
Don Sabinske, Sabinske & Associates Inc. - Zimmerman, MN
Sabinske & Associates Inc.

The analogy might work.  I see your points here.  The promises are nearly all one-sided, however. 

Aug 12, 2010 01:03 AM #1
Michael Delaware
North Sky Realty LLC - Battle Creek, MI

Great comparison.  Ten years ago you never heard of loan modification and all of these other factors, now they do start to compare to marriage vows.

Aug 12, 2010 01:28 AM #2
Joan Cox
Metro Brokers - House to Home, Inc. - Denver Real Estate - 720-231-6373 - Denver, CO
Denver Real Estate - Selling One Home at a Time

Very good analogy, but mortgages ARE one-sided, you pay, or you don't stay!     Great post and great thoughts on the two!

Aug 12, 2010 01:43 AM #3
Ginny Gorman
RI Real Estate Services ~ 401-529-7849~ RI Waterfront Real Estate - North Kingstown, RI
Homes for Sale in North Kingstown RI and beyond

Don, it's true it doesn't always work...thanks for your thoughts.

Michael & Joan...some marriage vows are honored as well as this case the bank was very workable with the homeowner. However, the seller was 'stuck' mentally to get on with it.  best to you

Aug 12, 2010 01:46 AM #4
Dagny Eason
Dagny's Real Estate - Wilton, CT
Fairfield County CT, CDPE Homes For Sale and Condo

Ginny - What a great analogy!   You don't hear of the banks compromising too much, though.....

Aug 12, 2010 03:36 PM #5
Carra & Shae Riley
Brokers Guild Cherry Creek Ltd - Westminster, CO
Helping people Transition at all ages!

Ginny~  We do have some serious issues here.. mortgages or marriages.. promises, promises!

Aug 12, 2010 06:42 PM #6
Ginny Gorman
RI Real Estate Services ~ 401-529-7849~ RI Waterfront Real Estate - North Kingstown, RI
Homes for Sale in North Kingstown RI and beyond

Dagny, the smaller banks are more 'compromising' but few & far between...good luck with the tennis!


Carra...when will it ever end I am constantly being asked...well like marriages..mortgages will change!  have a great weekend

Aug 13, 2010 03:11 AM #7
Loreena and Michael Yeo
3:16 team REALTY ~ Locally-owned Frisco TX Real Estate Co. - Frisco, TX
Real Estate Agents

My real answer is Yes and No. Previously, before Katerina Gasset added a perspective to my thoughts, I felt that Mortgage is similar to a Marriage Covenant. But these days, it's tough with the economy. We must do everything we can to protect our promise. After all, our words should be worth gold. But sometimes, I guess like like a marriage, you may have to break them.

At one point, I was judgmental towards people who choose to short sale. I really had to take that back. Until I walk in their shoes, I would never know if I could say that.

Aug 13, 2010 11:55 PM #8
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Homes for Sale in North Kingstown RI and beyond
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