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Didn't Your Mother Ever Tell You If You Can't Say Something Nice, Don't Say Anything At All?

Reblogger
Real Estate Broker/Owner

This is a wonderful piece by Elizabeth Weintraub who writes nationally for About.com and here on Active Rain.  This particular post struck a cord with being in a new area and seeing some really bad behaviour on the part of some of the long time agents.  These agents have a sense of entitlement that because they have been selling real estate for a long time they own the market.  Competition is not healthy and a good thing but something to bad mouth and try to stop....

Original content by Elizabeth Weintraub Sacramento Broker DRE #00697006

land park agentA while back an agent in my office asked if I would be willing to spend some time with her. She asked me to explain how to do a daily real estate blog and show her what I do online. While it may seem to some that everybody is online these days, I know that they aren't. Especially older real estate agents, which tend to make up most of the population of any given real estate office. But I like to help people when I can, so I agreed to talk with this agent.

We went into the conference room and sat in front of the computer. I explained what I do and where I post my blogs. To show her why I blog, I went to Google and put in the search term "east sacramento agent." My blogs and website popped up a number of times in the first 10 results.

I expected to see amazement in the agent's eyes. But that's not what happened, and I was completely unprepared for her reaction. Her eyes flashed anger and hatred. Her lips quivered. She said in a demanding tone, "That's not fair. I've been selling homes in East Sacramento for 25 years. Why isn't my name there?"

Last night I watched an ESPN special. Now, ESPN is not a channel that I watch but I was introduced to its "30 for 30" film series by my husband. Its documentary "Unmatched" is about the friendship between pro tennis champs Chris Evert and Martina Navratilova. Two competitors. 80 matches. Friends. It was moving.

See, I don't hate anybody in real estate. Maybe that's easy for me to say because I'm basically a pretty easy-going person. I look at the wide variety of people who are in this business and, even if I don't particularly like another agent, I figure someday I might represent a buyer who would like to buy that agent's listing or vice versa so I try to find something to like about the person. I respect other real estate agents. I welcome competition. Maybe I'll win the listing, maybe I won't. It's OK either way.

There is an agent in my Land Park office who sells a lot of homes in Land Park. She sells more than me, although I'm not so sure about this year. I admire her. I look up to her. I hold absolutely no grudge against her. I'm pretty sure she feels the same way about me.

I often hear other agents openly bad mouthing competitors. For some, it's jealousy or rivalry. For others, it might be some kind of unjustified compensation factor because they think that by tearing somebody else down they can build themselves up. Or they might have just reason. Maybe the agent is the lying, cheating, conniving, person some in the public think we are but sooner or later that person will get what's coming. It's karma.

I feel ashamed when I hear those types of comments from my fellow agents about their competitors. I think we as agents should do a better job of supporting each other and stop stabbing each other in the back. That kind of behavior is disgraceful. Our economic times are trying enough as they are. If Evert and Navratilova can do it, so can we. You think?

sacramento short sale agent

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Elizabeth Weintraub is an author, home buying columnist for The New York Times-owned About.com, a Land Park resident, and a Land Park real estate agent who specializes in older, classic homes in Land Park, Curtis Park, Midtown and East Sacramento. Weintraub is also a Sacramento Short Sale agent who lists and successfully sells short sales throughout Sacramento. Call Elizabeth Weintraub at 916.233.6759. Put 35 years of real estate experience to work for you. Broker-Associate at Lyon Real Estate. DRE License # 00697006.

The Short Sale Savior, by Elizabeth Weintraub, available through bookstores everywhere and at Amazon.com.

Photo: Unless otherwise noted in this blog, the photo is copyrighted by Big Stock Photo and used with permission.

The views expressed herein are Weintraub's personal views and do not reflect the views of Lyon Real Estate.

Disclaimer: If this post contains a listing, information is deemed reliable as of the date it was written. After that date, the listing may be sold, listed by another brokerage, canceled, pending or taken temporarily off the market, and the price could change without notice. It could blow up, explode or vanish. To find out the present status of any listing, please go to elizabethweintraub.com.

 

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Comments (3)

Gay E. Rosen
Julia B. Fee Sotheby's International Realty - Larchmont, NY
As Real as Real Estate Gets!

Hi Miriam: I was always taught that we will be dealing with the area agents far longer than the customers and clients, and so it thus very important to treat each other with repect. Have a great day. Gay

Sep 19, 2010 04:33 AM
Miriam Bernstei
Rochester, NY

Hi Gay, how is Westchester County?  Yes I agree with you however some agents are very threatened and don't always behave in the best way.  Thanks for the comment.

Sep 19, 2010 04:37 AM
Donald Tepper
Long and Foster - Fairfax, VA
DC area investor helping heirs of inherited homes

Good post.

As you note, it's entirely possible to be competitors, even fierce competitors, and be personal friends. Or at least to fully respect the other person and his/her skills and abilities.

You cited Chris Evert and Martina Navratilova. Your husband--if he's a fan (or maybe you though most women aren't)--can tell you that the same thing happens frequently in MMA (mixed martial arts) competitions. (MMA is a combination of various sports, often including boxing or kickboxing, jiu jitsu and grappling, wrestling, sometimes judo, sometimes karate, sometimes a few others.) It's violent. The goal is to knock out your opponent, get your opponent to submit, or win on points.

But you can often see a high level of respect among the opponents. From tapping of gloves before a round, to embracing after a fight. Now, the respect has to be earned. You have to "fight fair" (yes, there are rules), and show respect for your opponent. Some fighters earn that respect. Others don't. 

But if MMA fighters--who go into the octagon with the intent of physically dominating the opponent--can show respect for one another and for the other's skills and abilities, then I'd think that Realtors are capable of the same behavior

Sep 19, 2010 05:09 AM