Yeah, yeah! You readers think this is a post written by that prolific blogger, Patricia Kennedy. Hah! It's not! Pat forgot about this contest, so I had to break into her computer to write an entry for her. My ulterior motive? To expose how stingy she is with one of the items stored under her kitchen sink: my Fiesta Delites dog treats!
First, an introduction. I am the occasionally maligned Willie, the hyper-active Labradoodle who somehow (strange karma, perhaps?) got paired up with Pat as my human. She has introduced me to you through several posts, in particular one accusing me of humping a client's leg. OK. I do that. But still, I thought that post was in questionable taste.
Things might have worked out swimmingly if Pat hadn't hired a dog trainer who believed that feeding dogs treats to encourage (or discourage) certain types of behavior was a bad thing. So I felt a little deprived during my formative puppy-hood.
He gave her a bunch of noisy chains in a little cloth sack to throw in my direction if she caught me chewing one of her Jimmy Choo's. Only after I made it very clear that I would behave only in exchange for tasty snacks did she give up and add dog treats to the grocery list.
Also, there is nothing more challenging for Man's Best Friend than having a workaholic, blogaholic, Type-A real estate broker as your human!
Right now, she is on a diet. Sometimes she forgets to eat, and when she does, she remembers my Dog Chow, but often forgets the treats. So I did what any smart Labradoodle would do - I climbed up on the kitchen counter and got them myself. I ingested about two thirds of the box, which gave me a bit of a tummy ache.
Now the treats are kept under the sink with the Comet, Oxi Clean Odor and Dirt Eliminator, and Old English furniture polish. And it really annoys me that I can't get the door open. See, I'm good at most doors.
I can open the doors from the hallways to most of the rooms in the house. I can even get the rear gate open in the back yard if I decide to have a little adventure with the cute lady Goldendoodle around the corner. But as soon as I escape, Pat issues an Amber Alert to the Crestwood Neighborhood Association's list serve, and one of the neighbors will lure me into their house with, you guessed it, doggy treats.
They are like drugs to me!
At least we live in a really fun neighborhood - Crestwood. This is a shot of Darcey, my favorite poodle who lives on 17th Street, and I cavorting in the yard of the old Latvian Embassy around the corner from our house. I heard Pat say that they sold as a FSBO for a pittance after they moved the embassy to new digs.
Pat took these photos. But I gotta say, I'm proud that I figured out how to insert them into an Active Rain blog post!
Oh oh! I hear the beep beeping of the alarm signaling her arrival home. I better push the "Submit" button right now and put this machine back to sleep!
Do you think she'll ever know I did this?
Oh, and I'm sure that, like me, Pat Kennedy really can blog about anything!
Hmmm. Dare I make this a Pubic Post?
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