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When You Have to Say Goodbye

By
Real Estate Agent with Elizabeth Anne Weintraub, Broker DRE #00697006

Brandon the catIt looks like today I am putting my cat to sleep. That's such a strange way of putting it, but it beats saying we're putting him out of his misery by injecting him with a chemical that will kill him. It sounds like it's so peaceful and normal, an everyday event. Just going to bed. Just a little nap. Except, he will never wake up again.

I have never been in this position, but I know other people who have and how hard it can be. All of my other cats -- and I've always shared my life with cats -- have died by other means, generally when I wasn't around. When you're not right there, staring at the dead body, it lessens the pain a little bit.

Today is also the anniversary of John Lennon's death. It seems fitting to share that day of mourning with the death of my cat. My cat, Brandon, has lived for 19 years, four months and 19 days. In cat years, that's a lot longer than John Lennon.

The photo you see of Brandon was taken on November 30th, 2010. He was happy. Four years ago this month, the Midtown Animal Clinic in Davis diagnosed Brandon with kidney disease. The doctors made it sound like he was going to die at any moment. But he's lived 4 years longer than the doctors thought. We've had a few emergency runs to the UC Davis Vet Hospital, but he's always come out of it OK. I don't think it's gonna happen this time.

For the most part, he's been a very happy cat the past four years as he's struggled with this disease. If you know about renal failure in cats, you know that the BUN level in the bloodwork is important to monitor. His BUN has been fluctuating from about 35 to 45. Yesterday, it was elevated and almost double at 72. He hasn't been eating since Monday, is having difficulty breathing and can barely walk. There is no quality of life. The purring has stopped. It breaks my heart to see him like this, and I'm sure it's no picnic for him either.

As a last ditch effort, the vet put him on an IV yesterday; we're pumping him full of fluids. But I believe it's time to say goodbye, much as I hate to say it.

The heart can only stand so much, you know. I was telling a client yesterday that I hope to god I don't receive any more short sale approvals this week because my heart can't take it. All of the short sale approvals I've been receiving lately expire at the end of this month, and I've received 3 or 4 this week so far. That means we have less than 30 days to close escrow. We're talking high stress level. But I am more than a Sacramento short sale agent. I am a woman. As such, I am strong. I've made it this far in life and, as much as it pains me, I will get through today as well.

Photo: Elizabeth Weintraub

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Elizabeth Weintraub is co-partner of Weintraub & Wallace Team of Top Producing Realtors, an author, home buying expert at The Balance, a Land Park resident, and a veteran real estate agent who specializes in older, classic homes in Land Park, Curtis Park, Midtown, Carmichael and East Sacramento, as well as tract homes in Elk Grove, Natomas, Roseville and Lincoln. Call Elizabeth Weintraub at 916.233.6759. Put our combined 80 years of real estate experience to work for you. Broker-Associate at RE/MAX Gold. DRE License # 00697006.

Photo: Unless otherwise noted in this blog, the photo is copyrighted by Big Stock Photo and used with permission.The views expressed herein are Weintraub's personal views and do not reflect the views of RE/MAX Gold. Disclaimer: If this post contains a listing, information is deemed reliable as of the date it was written. After that date, the listing may be sold, listed by another brokerage, canceled, pending or taken temporarily off the market, and the price could change without notice; it could blow up, explode or vanish. To find out the present status of any listing, please go to elizabethweintraub.com.

Comments(17)

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Gloria Valvasori, Accredited Senior Agent
BETTER HOMES AND GARDENS REAL ESTATE SIGNATURE SERVICE - Mississauga, ON
REAL Experience | REAL Commitment | REAL Results!

Elizabeth, I have been in this situation myself....I had a cat with renal failure too and sadly had to put her down too... she had no quality of life, was not eating, etc. much the same as yours.

Its a very sad day for you....so I can empathize.. Its a difficult thing to do... but a humane act...

Have you ever read a verse entitled The Rainbow Bridge?   I will send it to you, and perhaps will provide you with some comfort....

Dec 08, 2010 01:25 AM
Don MacLean
New England Real Estate Center Inc. - Easton, MA
Realtor-Homes for Sale- Easton, Mass 02356

I know how you feel, I went through the same with my dog.

I actually keep a picture of him over my visor. It will get easier.

Prayers are with you

 

Dec 08, 2010 01:30 AM
Mary Douglas
United Country Ponderosa Realty, Red Feather Lakes, Colorado - Red Feather Lakes, CO
REALTOR, Red Feather Lakes, Colorado

Elizabeth, it's a sad day - I will be thinking of you and sending peaceful thoughts your way.  I've been there too when the vet put our dog down - it's the saddest thing to have to say goodbye. I'm so sorry you have to go through it today.

Dec 08, 2010 01:59 AM
Kathleen Daniels, Probate & Trust Specialist
KD Realty - 408.972.1822 - San Jose, CA
Probate Real Estate Services

Elizabeth, I’ve been there with a pet … had to make the decision to let her go because she really was suffering and there was nothing else the Vet could do for her. It’s heart-wrenching. My heart goes out to you as you say goodbye to Brandon.

Dec 08, 2010 02:14 AM
Missy Caulk
Missy Caulk TEAM - Ann Arbor, MI
Savvy Realtor - Ann Arbor Real Estate

Elizabeth, I am so sorry to read this about your cat. I know how hard this is. Our dogs are getting older too. We had a cat adopt us once, she got sick, we had no clue. I found Felicity had died on the heat vent in my closet. It was so sad, she was really more like a dog, in that she came when called and would sleep in my arms like a baby.

My thoughts will be with you during this time.

Why are all the short sales giving us until the end of the year. Weird, isn't it? i am up against the same thing here. Really busy trying to get 3 closed.

 

Dec 08, 2010 02:38 AM
Chris Ann Cleland
Long and Foster Real Estate - Gainesville, VA
Associate Broker, Bristow, VA

I am so sorry that you find yourself in this position.  You are doing the humane thing.  Try to remember that you got to love Brandon for 19 wonderful years.  I hope to have one of my cats that long.  They are short term blessings to our lives and it hurts to lose them.  Wish I could give you a big hug.

Dec 08, 2010 03:00 AM
Myrl Jeffcoat
Sacramento, CA
Greater Sacramento Realtor - Retired

Elizabeth - I am so sorry to hear this sad news about Brandon.  These end of life issues with beloved pets can be so difficult.   But having experienced kidney disease with one of my own cats in the past, I know it can be really hard on them.

My heart is with you Elizabeth!  Dealing with loss like this during the holidays isn't easy!

Dec 08, 2010 04:28 AM
Cindy Jones
Integrity Real Estate Group - Woodbridge, VA
Pentagon, Fort Belvoir & Quantico Real Estate News

Elizabeth-I have not had the good fortunate of having any of my cats die peacefully in their sleep of natural causes.   Each and every time I have had to make the painful decision to be with them while the vet cared out the agonizing decision that ended their lives.  They were all loved as your Brandon was and all lived catered lives of luxury but it isn't easy.  My heart goes out to you as you deal with the loss.  It breaks a little piece of my heart each time I have to say goodbye to one of my beloved kitties but stupid me I go out and get another one as I can't imagine life without them.

Dec 08, 2010 07:15 AM
Nancy Conner
Olympia, WA
Olympia/Thurston County WA

Elizabeth - I'm so sorry - there is just no easy way to say goodbye to a loved pet, even when it is clearly the loving thing to do for them. 

Dec 08, 2010 07:44 AM
Tammy Lankford,
Lane Realty Eatonton, GA Lake Sinclair, Milledgeville, 706-485-9668 - Eatonton, GA
Broker GA Lake Sinclair/Eatonton/Milledgeville

I'll leave it at I'm sorry and I have been there.

Dec 08, 2010 08:47 AM
Donne Knudsen
Los Angeles & Ventura Counties in CA - Simi Valley, CA
CalState Realty Services

Elizabeth - So sorry for your pain right now; I know what you're going through, been there and done that more than I care to remember.  As you already know, it's the humane thing to do.

Dec 08, 2010 09:15 AM
Cynthia Larsen
Cotati, CA
Independent Broker In Sonoma County, CA

That's a tough one, Elizabeth. 19 years is a lot of bonding time ... I'm sure you provided the best life that cat could have ever had.

Dec 08, 2010 01:13 PM
Colleen Fischesser Northwest Property Shop
NextHome Experience - Chelan, WA
A Tradition of Trust in the Pacific NW since 1990!

Ugh! That's a tough day indeed, Elizabeth. When we allow pets into our hearts, we know we will (hopefully) outlive them, but it's never easy when that moment comes. I'm sure Brandon had 19 years of a wonderful life.

Dec 08, 2010 01:59 PM
Cathy McAlister
Cathy Ashley McAlister, GRI CDPE - Broker / Sacramento - Sacramento, CA
Sacramento DRE#00648507

Elizabeth.... you know I am so sorry about your little guy.  I have enjoyed your stories about Brandon, and have been aware that he has reigned in Weintraub world far longer than expected.  Bravo to him for the success and Bravo to you & your hubby for giving him a life that thrived. 

Dec 08, 2010 03:35 PM
Elizabeth Weintraub Sacramento Broker
Elizabeth Anne Weintraub, Broker - Sacramento, CA
Put 40 years of experience to work for you

Thank you, everybody. It was a pretty rough afternoon and evening yesterday. Brandon was so special to me. I have 2 other cats, but they don't really have that bond with me. I love them, but it's not the same. Except for my husband, I was the only person on the face of this Earth who Brandon cared about.

I will tell you a true story. When my husband first came to visit me, he was living in Cincinnati and I was living in Minneapolis. He stayed at my house. While he was in the bath, a mouse ran in from the back yard. I lived on a pond, and we had a lot of mice. Brandon spotted the critter and chased the mouse up the stairs. I followed them, shrieking. My husband came running out of the bath, wrapped in a towel. The mouse ran under the sofa, where Brandon couldn't get it. I grabbed the broom and yelled at my husband to get up on the sofa and jump up and down, which he did, without hesitating.

There was nothing so funny as seeing my date jumping on the sofa, hanging on to his bath towel. The mouse came out and Brandon caught him. I said to myself at that moment, "This is a man I'm gonna marry."

Dec 09, 2010 04:20 AM
Doug Anderson
Tucker Associates Real Estate Services - Danville, CA
Bay Area Real Estate Views

Elizabeth - I am sorry about your loss. I have a little guy that is a blogging companion (I think he likes the heat of the computer more than me) and just turned 17. We had to put his brother down a little over five years ago and that was very hard. The little guys were a gift from a Realtor in Santa Monica in 1993 after the loss of the cat I had through college. It will get better over time. They are certainly great friends with individual personalities which is why I will always look forward to having a new kitten in the home when one is lost.

Dec 10, 2010 04:36 PM
Cece Blase
Paragon Real Estate Group - San Francisco, CA

Elizabeth:

Been there. Done that. And it was perhaps the hardest thing I ever did. But wow, Brandon was old! You're lucky you got that much time with him. My favorite kitty didn't hang on that long-- I actually envy you a bit getting that bit of extra time. Hope your holidays are special in spite of it.

Dec 13, 2010 04:33 PM