Buyer: Hey, I want to see this house. Where is the agent?
Agent: I'm right here. You mean this lovely house. It's perfect for you! And the seller is very motivated!
Buyer: Yes? Can I do an inspection? How much is it? Can I get a deal? Can I get 89% of your commission?
Agent: I assure you, no inspection is necessary. It's brand new! And the location is excellent. I can cut you a deal if you buy it right now! I don't get commission - I work for free. Special deal for you - just today. Look, the home is perfect for you and the colors are with the latest trends, very popular.
Buyer: OK then. You sound like a man of your word. It does look perfect. How much?
Agent: Oh, it is a great bargain, just for you my friend. Only $12534983473843 and HOA is included. But it's just for today and I have somebody else coming to look at it in a little bit. Oh, and it's cash only. It's perfect for you.
Buyer: Well I don't want to lose the house. But it's a lot of money.
Agent: You will have instant equity on this beauty!
Buyer: Really?
Agent: Oh, yes. Wait until you see the upgrades. Top of the line. Newest materials in the universe.
Buyer: Ok then. Lucky I brought my cash. Here.
Agent: Thank you. Go right on in, the keys are inside. I need to make a quick phone call (disappearing...)
Buyer: Hmm, where is the door. Well, oh, well. This will do.
Buyer: Whoaaa....
CRASH
Buyer: Grrrr, newest materials huh? I have been betrayed!
Buyer: Where did that agent go?
Meanwhile, at the Canina...
Yo, bartender - bring me another one!
...back at the house (well what's left of it) ...
Buyer: I wonder if duct tape will fix this?
...duct tape rolling in with a help of buyer's assistant
Hope you enjoyed the story. This story is in no way a reflection of any real estate professional or buyer and the scene is a complete fiction of imagination and intended for entertainment. The story dedicated for my 10-yr-old son who is a huge Star Wars fan.
