Kodak Moment Remembering a Good Man
Scrambling over some boulders on a crisp cold morning in Yosemite National Park, my Father laughed as he glanced up and noticed the sign warning people to avoid "scrambling over the nearby boulders". I don't even remember why we were off the trail but as we reached the path, I retrieved one of those Kodak disposable cameras from my jacket and asked a passerby to snap a photo of us standing beside the sign. I tried to frame it for the person who kindly agreed to our request but composition and color balance are not what make up a Kodak Moment. Ten years ago, Christmas 2001, my family had the great fortune to spend the holiday in Yosemite National Park and enjoy a Christmas Dinner at the Awahnee Lodge. We managed to be a part of a lottery that determined a seat in the annual ritual at the Lodge. If you've never been to Yosemite National Park, it's an amazing place with an abundance of raw natural beauty and one of our country's treasures. Baugh Lewis was an avid outdoors man who enjoyed hunting, camping, hiking, running, fishing, and wildlife conservation. He shared his enthusiasm with my brother and me and spent his life teaching us an appreciation of the outdoors and nature so Yosemite was like an amusement park for us!
They say a picture is worth a thousand words and a Kodak Moment is certainly that but even more. The way a simple picture manages to capture an image, freezing in time a moment that inspires an emotion and the essence of a memory. As I mentioned, it's not about great photography though I admit, a beautiful photograph can certainly arouse a wide range of emotions and reactions. For me this photo is a very special reminder of a connection to something and someone so familiar and evokes a response that is intensely personal. Seven months after this picture was taken my Father was died. The Non-Hodgkin's Lymphoma he overcame 4 years before returned with a vengeance and he made the decision to die with dignity, at home with our family around. I feel so fortunate that we had such a loving and supportive relationship and that we had no regrets or unfinished business. Unlike many, we were able to share our feelings, thoughts and ideas during The Living Years. The day of his service, the church was filled with hundreds of people from the community that Baugh Lewis touched in some positive way. Folks from all walks of life came to pay their last respects to a man who had given so much to his family, his business, employees and the community at large. It was living testament to Baugh Lewis, a person who actually "practiced what he preached". I remember the last time I dreamed about you. I told you that I missed you and you replied, "I know" and then put your arms around me. I know you are still with us.
My father used to play with my brother and me in the yard. Mother would come out and say, "You're tearing up the grass." "We're not raising grass," Dad would reply. "We're raising boys." -Harmon Killebrew
It is often mentioned that every family has some dysfunction but the quote above is an excellent description of my Father's attitude about being a parent and raising a family. When my brother and I were threatened with, "Wait until your Dad gets home!" he would arrive after a hard day of work, survey the situation and almost always find nothing to inspire punishment and simply say, "Boy's will be boys" and urge everyone to move on. I remember his basic guidelines:
1. Was anyone physically hurt or injured due to mean or neglectful behavior.
2. Was anything broken?
3. What difference does it make a year from now?
And if we saw something that we wanted/needed while out in public,"Does it cost more than a dollar?" Understand that this was in the last century during the 1960's...
Dad was a successful businessman who traveled and was often away from home but we never felt an absence because when he was around, he was always available, patient and incredibly supportive. He taught by example and my brother and I learned so much from him about family, living, giving back to the community, sharing and more than I can ever begin to document here. Several months after he died I was working in his office preparing for the transition of the business when I came across a folder with a mission statement for his life. He had been a Steven Covey fan for years and was always looking at ways to improve himself and the world around. One of the questions on the form was, "How do you want to be remembered?" He was incredibly modest and I was struck by his modest wish that when he was gone, people would say, "He was a good man." I am still amazed at the powerful simplicity of that because he was a GOOD MAN and so much more. Dad was the glue that held us together, the wisdom that helped us thrive and the love that nurtured, protected and allowed us to grow. I look at the picture daily and am reminded of all the ways he influenced us; usually remembering to be grateful as I try and carry his lessons with me as I make my way through each day.
Thanks Dad, Merry Christmas!
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