MORTGAGE BANKING DICTIONARY*
Borrower : Otherwise intelligent consumer who believes lender should
kiss him on both cheeks and give him the money - without all this
credit report nonsense.
Closer: This person's only job is to salvage forty or fifty emergencies
at the last moment of every end of month. This person is rarely sane.
Closing Date : Put into purchase contracts to give the closer fits of
hysterical laughter.
Credit Report: Basis for advanced creative writing by Processor and
buyer since white-out doesn't work anymore.
Escrow Officer : A humorless individual who is only truly happy when
they can blame the late closing on the lender.
Fannie Mae : Government agency run by ex-stripper.
Freddie Mac : Type of hamburger consumed in cars by loan officers.
Ginny Mae : Type of alcoholic beverage consumed in large quantities by
mortgage employees.
Good Faith Estimate: Standard document which a loan officer presents
to the buyer to confuse them further.
Loan Application: Document which mysteriously causes amnesia to the
borrower concerning income, credit, bills, and ex-spouses.
Loan Officer : Highly qualified financial analyst who typically
developed these skills while selling used cars or encyclopedias.
Processor: Overworked, underpaid person who collects the garbage
received from the loan officer and transforms it into a real loan.
These individuals are known to consume massive amounts of candy, popcorn, and
cookies.
Rate : This figure is always higher than the buyer's uncle thinks it
should be.
Realtor : Highly trained professional who nevertheless has trouble
figuring out how to subtract the down payment from the sales price to
get the loan amount, but has no trouble figuring exact commission
without a calculator.
Underwriter : Conscientious employee otherwise known as "God". Their
most difficult task is responding to loan agent's explanations of poor
credit and income history while maintaining a straight face.
"We need further information" : We lost your file.
Your loan is in committee : The underwriter/Processors are having a
three margarita lunch and we can't find them.
*COURTESY: Tedd Swanson, Mortgage Broker
BILL CHERRY, REALTORS
DALLAS - PARK CITIES
Since 1964
214 503-8563
Comments(5)