How to say NO ... to Family!

Real Estate Broker/Owner with Scates Realty & Investment Properties

OK .. I know everyone has been burned a time or two or three BUT from family!  Soooooo How do you tell a family member no or even referring them out without feeling the burn too much?  There's some family that expect you to work for FREE!  Then there's the family that wants a discount that you might as well have worked for free!  So what do you tell them ... especially if it was the other way around you'd be paying for their services but THEY seem to forget that or not see it that way!  What then?  

I understand its family and you should take care of them - but isn't having their best interest at heart and being the professional on their side enough?

Comments - Opinions - join in my rants ....


Comments (5)

Gaylen Thornton
Desert Heritage Real Estate - Surprise, AZ

Tough question but I believe in just saying no. Depending upon there vocation, like a dentist, you could asked them if they would do your teeth for free? We both could guess the answer. If you do it with a smile you probably will still take the heat, but in the long run I think you will be much better off without the stress.

Oct 02, 2007 01:13 PM
Robin Willis
eXp Realty - Tucson, AZ
CDPE, SRES, Associate Broker

You could offer to work for free as long as they are willing to pay your mortgage, car payment and electric bill for the entire time you work for them. LOL

Oct 02, 2007 01:15 PM
Eileen Scates
Scates Realty & Investment Properties - Clermont, FL
CDPE, Broker

LOL!!!  Robin, I like your answer, it made me laugh!  Thanks!

Oct 02, 2007 01:19 PM
Daniel Sundberg
Crystal Springs Real Estate - Kentwood, MI

Nice Response Robin!  You are a hard hard act to follow.

Eileen, I don't know exactly what to say.  I'd want to be nice, but I probably would say what Robin said.  If their deal is out of the ordinary at all, just tell them they need a specialist and then refer the deal. 

Hopefully, common sense surfaces first and they become more than happy to pay you.  Come to think of it, last time someone wanted me to work for free, I asked them to do some work for me for free.  That didn't go over too well.

Oct 02, 2007 01:28 PM
Harvey Rosenberg
Realty Professionals of Florida, LLC - Clermont, FL
The best way to say NO.... is to scream it out loud and make sure everyone hears it!!!  Family is a hard group to tell NO, but sometimes, you need to remember that you have to feed yourself, and your bills and when bill time comes, watch the family run like roaches.  Be honest, tell them your too busy and if you stop to work for them for free then not only are you not making any money, but your losing money that you could be making while working for someone else.  However, this does not apply to all family members, as there are some that will also bend over backwards to help you, if that case you need to help them as well.  Just use good judgement.  Good luck with your aunts house!!!!
Oct 03, 2007 10:01 AM