Special offer

Wife says YES ... Husband says NO. Husband says YES ... Wife says NO.

By
Real Estate Broker/Owner CalBRE# 01433049

hose for saleWhen I represent buyers in the purchase of a home, about half of those buyers are single. In my experience, it has been less difficult selling a home to an individual and the reason is quite simple. When just one person is required to make a decision, there isn't anyone to argue with.

The other half of the time, I've represented buyers who are married, significant others or registered domestic partners. This can be a little more challenging and sometimes surprising ... especially for them.

Quite often I hear one of the pair saying "YES! THIS IS THE ONE!" while the other is shaking their head in dis-belief. "ARE YOU KIDDING ME?".

Some days this can be quite amusing. Other days it can be downright frustrating. It takes a lot of listening to realize the amenities required in a house where both parties will like it enough to make an offer.

This past Saturday was one of those days. Here are the results ...

  1. Both said "MAYBE" (if they could only move it somewhere else which means "NO")
  2. Wife said "YES", Husband said "NO" (busy street)
  3. Both said "NO" (too much work)
  4. Both said "NO" (but the wife wanted the chandelier)
  5. Husband said "YES", Wife said "NO WAY" (no explanation, just "no")
  6. Both said "NO" (kitchen sink was the focal point)
  7. Both said "YES" (as a runner up to their different first place choices ... sigh)
  8. Both said "YES" (ladies and gentlemen, we have a winner!)

Of course the first thing they did was accuse me of saving the best for last. Which I did. I said "let's write an offer". Which we did. And we still have all of our fingers and toes crossed.

 

Posted by

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Cynthia Larsen (707-332-2560) is an independent real estate referral broker in Sonoma County, California as well as a Certified Probate Real Estate Specialist.

CA Broker License #01433049

Comments(18)

Nancy Conner
Olympia, WA
Olympia/Thurston County WA

Other family members can also make for interesting conflicting opinions - I showed one house to a woman who was in love with it until her son started crying - crying HARD - & saying he hated it and would NEVER live there!  Yikes!!

Apr 26, 2011 11:04 AM
Cinnamon Wright
Wilmington Real Estate 4U 910.547.1446 - Wrightsville Beach, NC
Assistant to Tish Lloyd

Those yes/no conversations between partners are often amusing.  And frequently frustrating.  But they make good blog fodder!  And in the end, you got 'em on paper.  Good luck with having your offer accepted and everyone happy!

Apr 26, 2011 11:19 AM
Cynthia Larsen
Cotati, CA
Independent Broker In Sonoma County, CA

Nancy - oh my ... that must not have been pretty!

CA - yes it is very good blog fodder and thanks!

David - I've done that as well, but it doesn't seem as appealing with gas at $4.30 a gallon :)  Oh well, you'll always have to kiss some frogs to find the prince.

Apr 26, 2011 11:34 AM
Rob D. Shepherd
RETIRED - Florence, OR
RETIRED

This reminds me of an lod TV game show in the 70's called "The Newly Weda".

Apr 26, 2011 12:00 PM
Cynthia Larsen
Cotati, CA
Independent Broker In Sonoma County, CA

Ha ha, Rob. I forgot about the Newlyweds!

Apr 26, 2011 12:12 PM
Carol Faaland-Kronmaier
Weichert, Realtors; Hillsborough - Hillsborough, NJ
PhD, e-PRO, Manville, Hillsborough, Somerset NJ

Cynthia, This is why I warn sellers to fix anything that will give buyers a bad first impression. I have helped many buying couples where one sees something that they dislike at the beginning of the house tour that completely loses their focus on the house. It could be something in the entrance way or just too much clutter. Unfortunately no matter how much one person likes the house, the bad first impression sticks around to distract the other buyer. Carol

Apr 26, 2011 12:34 PM
Cynthia Larsen
Cotati, CA
Independent Broker In Sonoma County, CA

Carol - unfortunately, my market is pretty distressed. Every home but two were vacant properties. The occupied ones were #1 (first place for the wife) and #5 (first place for the husband) until we saw the last house (vacant but not bank owned).

Apr 26, 2011 12:45 PM
Anna "Banana" Kruchten
HomeSmart Real Estate - Phoenix, AZ
602-380-4886

Hey Cynthia - I was thinking of the newlywed game too!  I can hear the music playing now.  And I agree they're going to have to write out their lists first - compare them ahead - before we go looly gagging about the city at such high prices.

Apr 26, 2011 01:14 PM
Jane Peters
Home Jane Realty - Los Angeles, CA
Los Angeles real estate concierge services

How many nos does it take to get a yes?  This would seem to be a combination of them.  Congrats on the meeting of the minds, finally.

Apr 26, 2011 02:22 PM
Cynthia Larsen
Cotati, CA
Independent Broker In Sonoma County, CA

Anna Banana - they were pretty on board with the same list, but we visited very diverse neighborhoods (built by different builders, different years) and the floor plans were all over the map.

Jane - thanks ... and I just heard we had our offer accepted!

Apr 26, 2011 03:00 PM
Christine Smith
Buyers Brokers Only LLC - www.BuyersBrokersOnly.com - Canton, MA
Exclusive Buyer Agent & Attorney, Canton, MA

It happens all the time with husbands & wives!  Congrats on getting the offer accepted.

Apr 26, 2011 03:53 PM
Ken Barker RealtorĀ® GRI, E-Pro Certified
Dilbeck Real Estate - Burbank, CA

Cynthia  -  How about introducing a father into the mix? I am struggling with that now and it is a Million dollar price range. Yes/No/No/Maybe.

Congrats on your offer and good luck.

Apr 26, 2011 04:09 PM
Peggy Hughes/pha logistix, inc.
pha logistix inc - San Francisco, CA
SF NYC LA

Cynthia... good luck on your offer!  I agree, working with a diversity of couples is always interesting!

Apr 26, 2011 06:16 PM
Malcolm Johnston
Century 21 Lanthorn Real Estate LTD., Trenton, Ontario - Trenton, ON
Trenton Real Estate

Cynthia, congratulations on getting a positive result at the end of the day. It's not easy trying to get the needs/wants/desires of two people to coincide sometimes. It reminds me of the time when I was showing a house with a gorgeous new kitchen which the wife was admiring, and the husband piped up "you haven't cooked a decent meal in years, you don't need this". I was cringing in the background.

Apr 27, 2011 02:01 AM
Cynthia Larsen
Cotati, CA
Independent Broker In Sonoma County, CA

Christine - oh the things we hear :) Thanks!

Ken - yes, I've had parents in the mix who were helping with the down payment. They weren't going to live there, but their "tastes" had to be satisfied too.

Peggy - thanks! The dynamics are fun, there can be some great laughs and bonding during the process.

Malcolm - ooh, I guess a decent kitchen doesn't mean a decent meal. Ouch!

Apr 27, 2011 03:13 AM
Carla Muss-Jacobs, RETIRED
RETIRED / State License is Inactive - Portland, OR

Getting to yes is a great thing.  Both have to be in agreement, and it's nice to find a property for your clients that YES is on both their lips!!

Apr 27, 2011 04:53 AM
Cynthia Larsen
Cotati, CA
Independent Broker In Sonoma County, CA

Ha ha, Carla, that would be a great graphic ... YES plastered over both buyers lips!

Apr 27, 2011 09:05 AM