10. The window. My buyers were very excited to see this particular house. When we got there the lock box was missing. I called the listing agent and she said that she thinks the back window might not lock and that if we wanted we could try to get in that way. Well duh, of course we crawled in the window! While the neighbors laughed at us I hoisted Corey up, he got in, and we saw the house.
9. The cat. I was doing an agent preview for an investor in Fort Wayne because he was out of town. The house was a foreclosure and vacant. If you have never been in a vacant house with no power... it can be kinda creepy. I slowly opened the attic door and out jumped a screeching cat! I almost crapped my pants.
8. The truck. A few years ago we had a bad snow storm, but that didn't stop my buyer from wanting to see a foreclosure. We both had 4 X 4s at the time so off we went. Since the home was a foreclosure the very steep driveway wasn't plowed. That didn't stop my buyer. He built up speed and away he went! He made it about halfway up before the tires started spinning. Dude was stuck.
7. The little old lady. We had just listed a house in Copper Hill in South West Fort Wayne. I went back the second day to put some fliers in the box when the sweet little old lady from across the street walked over. I said hello and we chatted for a few minutes. She quietly looked at me and said, "I'm glad this family is moving. They are real son's a b**ches!!" I think I laughed for 10 minutes.
6. The dog. A few years ago I was doing an open house in New Haven when the neighbor's dog walked over to say hello. I love dogs and of course I wanted to pet him! I took one step towards him and he went nuts barking and started lunging at me and he tried to bite my leg. I jumped back, kicked at him, and then turn and ran like a little girl. Thankfully I made it into the house. Then I started laughing. :)
5. The poop. I was out showing houses to Patti and Ashlee. We walked into a house and I smelled poop. I knew it wasn't Patti or Ashlee and I was hoping it wasn't me! I looked down at my shoe and saw that it was smeared in poop. My buyers thought it was hilarious.
4. The screaming agent. I called John the agent to schedule a showing for one of his listings for 6:00 that night. He said that he would meet me there to unlock it. We got there at 5:55 and he wasn't there. I waited until 6:05 to call him. When I did he got huffy and puffy and said "You told me 6:30 damn it!! I'm just around the corner, I'll be there in 5 minutes." 6:20 rolls around and he still isn't there. I called again and told him we would re-schedule because we had 5 more houses to see. He exploded! "I'M JUST AROUND THE CORNER YOU STUPID BLEEPITY BLEEP! YOU BETTER WAIT FOR ME OR I'LL KICK YOUR A**!!!" I'm not kidding, he said that. I laughed and hung up and we never saw the house. Oh, and he didn't kick my ass either.
3. The second screaming agent. I was having a conversation with the listing agent on a deal we had going. He was as nice as can be until something didn't go his way. He called me and was screaming at the top of his lungs. I hung up. He called back screaming and asked my why I hung up. I told him because he was screaming. He started screaming again and I hung up again. It was a fun game that lasted about 5 minutes and had 5 hang ups.
2. The ashes. We listed and sold an estate for three sisters. Their mother had lived there for most of her adult life and they were all very attached to the home. At closing they walked in, sat down, and pulled out their mother's ashes and put the urn in the middle of the table. Talk about awkward silence...
1. The lovers. There is a real estate company in town that lists a lot of foreclosures. They are known to leave all of the front doors unlocked. We pulled up to the house and saw a couple of bicycles in the driveway. I cautiously walked up to the front door, opened it, and announced that I was a Realtor and that I was showing the house to my buyers. I yelled again with no response.
We walked through the kitchen dining room and started to head towards the bedroom when my buyer said "Holy crap! They are having sex!!"
They both jumped up and scrambled to put their clothes on while explaining that they were interested in the house and wanted to buy it, but the listing agent wouldn't return their calls. Yeah. Right. There you have it, there is my list. :)
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