COURAGE ... is the ability to face challenges, difficulties, uncertainty that may cause pain in a world of what appears to be confusion fueled by fear that determines a path arrived from that decision or action taken.
Courage should never be a reaction but an action taken to express ones self in a manner of truth, knowing that it might hurt someone when the truth is spoken. Granted, one would never assume that the truth is to be broadcasted on an intimacy level yet there are times when the truth needs to be heard in a general form.
Fear is the inhibitor that usually blocks the courage and hence, fear is what makes our stomachs churn and our hearts ache because we might lack the courage/ability to speak or act upon.
I remember talking to my coach about a wall that was blocking me from increasing my production. We all have those walls. This wall was the fear of "I don't deserve it". That was the name of my wall.
"YOU DON'T DESERVE IT"
How can that wall be created? As a child and young adult, I studied classical music. I am talented and have a gift to express on the keyboard. In the 6th grade, I was playing music that graduates in college were playing. Every year, I would go to the St. Cecilia Society and compete against my own ability. I had no idea what my piano instructor wrote about me but believe me, she was tough! I remember going to the bench, relaxing at the grand piano in the auditorium and would see this table of judges who didn't smile, make any form of expression and it scared me. But I also knew, that they didn't know me, so if I got a bad rating, it didn't matter. Yet, year after year, I came out with "Superior Ratings". And year after year, my younger two siblings came out with lower ratings. My Mom, in her innocence told me that "I didn't deserve it, because I made my younger two siblings scared by an action or word." I believed her.
When I met with my coach, she had said that she saw me running into another wall and to think of what it was that I kept bumping into. We pressed on for about five minutes, and then "I don't deserve it" came flying out of my mouth. What most do not understand is that it is our sub-conscious that fuels those thoughts that are hidden in the walls of our lives.
Did my Mom say "You don't deserve it" to be nasty or hurtful? I don't think she did. She just wanted my other two siblings to achieve the same rating as she wanted the best for all of her children. What I later realized was that when I broke that wall down, "you don't deserve it", it had no merit because I realized that I excelled in the piano and my sister in the flute.
Fear usually is what stands between us and courage. We fear that we are going to loose our job. We drive ourselves crazy because we want someone to be our friend and yet that friendship doesn't take the form that we desired. Our husband or wife walks out on us and we sit and analyze what we could have done in the past to change instead of seeking the courage to put one foot in front of the other.
One of the best ways I have come to overcome fear is to face it head on by actions. Courage isn't about broadcasting your hurt, displeasure, fears but literally make a move in a positive direction that will break down that wall of fear.
So many today, are in default on their mortgages and think that they are the only ones in the boat. It's self punishment and self destruction. I have news for you who want to be the only ones in the boat: It's a ship ... several ships loaded with people with the same problem.
Fear is something that we are comfortable with because we have become acclimated to understanding and relating to unhappiness. We need to change the course by taking the courage to overcome that fear. One tiny pebble of fear that we can throw away with courage, creates a world of happiness. A world that will be easier to face because we have that courage.
DISCLOSURE: Do not be surprised when you take the courage to overcome the fear(s) in your life, that you will not be able to sleep that first night because you are so happy.
Comments(3)