I saw you this morning not long after you arrived. Thanks for not coming on full force just yet. Give us a day or two to adjust to the idea that things could get brutal.
Could we just consult for a minute or two at the start of you tenure?
Listen up August. We all understand you are the 'tough guy' of summer in the Ozarks. You're reputation is well earned and I'll give you high points for consistency. You boldly spell the beginning of the end of summer in so many ways. Kids go back to school, silencing the happy sounds of their reverie. The harvest begins in earnest. Our water bills go through the roof as we defend our turf. You dare to sit by while the lawn scorches and the flowers hang their heads, near death. You do not seem to care. You make the summer sun into a blow torch and give little rain and barely a breeze. Dude, what makes you like that? Need love? This is not the way to get it.
August. Could you try a little tenderness? You might like the accolades it would bring you. Your reputation could use repair my friend. I'm just saying...have mercy and you might get a better welcome next year.