I Can't Make This Stuff Up

By
Services for Real Estate Pros with Real Estate Pipeline, Inc.

I can't make this stuff up...

 

A New Orleans lawyer sought an FHA loan for a client.

 

He was told the loan would be granted if he could prove satisfactory title to a parcel of property being offered as collateral. The title to the property dated back to 1803, which took the Lawyer three months to track down. After sending the information to the FHA, he received the following reply:

"Upon review of your letter adjoining your client's loan application, we note that the request is supported by an Abstract of Title. While we compliment the able manner in which you have prepared and presented the application, we must point out that you have only cleared title to the proposed collateral property back to 1803. Before final approval can be accorded, it will be necessary to clear the title back to its origin."

Annoyed, the lawyer responded as follows:

"Your letter regarding title in Case No. 189156 has been received. I note that you wish to have title extended further than the 194 years covered by the present application. I was unaware that any educated person in this country, particularly those working in the property area, would not know that Louisiana was purchased, by the U.S., from France in 1803, the year of origin identified in our application. For the edification of uninformed FHA bureaucrats, the title to the land prior to U.S. ownership was obtained from France, which had acquired it by Right of Conquest from Spain. The land came into the possession of Spain by Right of Discovery made in the year 1492 by a sea captain named Christopher Columbus, who had been granted the privilege of seeking a new route to India by the Spanish monarch, Isabella. The good queen, Isabella, being a pious woman and almost as careful about titles as the FHA, took the precaution of securing the blessing of the Pope before she sold her jewels to finance Columbus' expedition. Now the Pope, as I'm sure you may know, is the emissary of Jesus Christ, the Son of God, and God,it is commonly accepted, created this world. Therefore, I believe it is safe to presume that God also made that part of the world called Louisiana.

God, therefore, would be the owner of origin and His origins date back to before the beginning of time, the world as we know it, AND the FHA. I hope you find God's original claim to be satisfactory. Now, may we have our loan?"

The loan was approved.


While you are laughing, follow Clint on Twitter. And, while wiping away the tears of joy, fan us on Facebook. ;-)

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Show All Comments
Rainer
273,482
Emmary Simpson
Las Cruces Homes and Land - Las Cruces, NM
Serving Las Cruces, NM

*Note to self* Do not drink beverages whilest reading Mr. Miller's posts. The outcome of this discovery has resulted in a soggy keyboard :)

Glad to have ya back in the Rain!

Aug 05, 2011 04:51 AM #1
Rainmaker
189,766
Clint Miller
Real Estate Pipeline, Inc. - Missoula, MT

Hey Emmary -- Glad to be back. ;-)

Aug 05, 2011 04:55 AM #2
Rainer
366,533
John Michailidis
Real Property Management of Sarasota & Manatee - Sarasota, FL
Real Property Management of Sarasota & M

That is fantastic! I thank you for sharing this very humorous story!

Aug 05, 2011 04:59 AM #3
Rainmaker
189,766
Clint Miller
Real Estate Pipeline, Inc. - Missoula, MT

SMP -- I thought it was hilarious! Had to share... ;-)

Aug 05, 2011 05:03 AM #4
Rainmaker
571,868
Bill Gillhespy
16 Sunview Blvd - Fort Myers Beach, FL
Fort Myers Beach Realtor, Fort Myers Beach Agent - Homes & Condos

Hi Clint,  Funny story for AR and so appropriate.  Always a safe bet poking fun at some clueless bureaucrats.  Have a terrifi9c weekend.

Aug 05, 2011 05:10 AM #5
Rainmaker
189,766
Clint Miller
Real Estate Pipeline, Inc. - Missoula, MT

Hey Bill! Long time, no see, my friend. Yeah, I was giggling histerically when I read this. I just had to post it. Couldnt help myself... ;-) Have a great weekend!

Aug 05, 2011 05:14 AM #6
Rainmaker
1,082,280
Sharon Alters
Coldwell Banker Vanguard Realty - 904-673-2308 - Fleming Island, FL
Realtor - Homes for Sale Fleming Island FL

Unbelievable - and hilarious! Thanks for sharing it, I needed a laugh this morning and good to see you here on Active Rain, Clint :)

Sharon

Aug 05, 2011 05:21 AM #7
Rainmaker
189,766
Clint Miller
Real Estate Pipeline, Inc. - Missoula, MT

Sharon -- Thank you so much! :-) Both for the like...and the comment. And yes, I spit coffee on my monitor when I read this. Its true...

Aug 05, 2011 05:23 AM #8
Rainmaker
1,730,003
Rob Thomas
Prestige Homes of The Tri Cities, Inc. CALL....423-341-6954 - Bristol, TN
Bristol TN-VA & Tri Cities Agent, ABR, GRI, e-Pro

Clint - how funny!! I will think of this post when I have to jump through hoops and cut though all the red tape we have to go through sometimes and maintain my sanity!  Thanks for posting...

Rob

Aug 05, 2011 07:01 AM #9
Rainmaker
189,766
Clint Miller
Real Estate Pipeline, Inc. - Missoula, MT

Rob -- Glad you liked this one. I was giggling like a 4yo getting mauled by puppies. ;-)

Aug 05, 2011 07:04 AM #10
Rainmaker
642,606
Dawn A Fabiszak
Private Label Realty ( Denver metro area, Colorado - Aurora, CO
The Dawn of a New Real Estate Experience!

Clint ~ I read this one before, but it is so well worth posting on AR!  I love when the "commoner" prooves the bureaucrat wrong!

Aug 08, 2011 05:46 AM #11
Rainmaker
189,766
Clint Miller
Real Estate Pipeline, Inc. - Missoula, MT

Hey Dawn... Yup. Me too! ;-)

Aug 08, 2011 06:57 AM #12
Rainer
30,180
Diana Hoyt
Lakes Region Buchanan Group, Ossipee, NH - Ossipee, NH

This is classic!  I love it. Can't believe that FHA would have needed to go back further anyway but this attorney was spot on!  (glad too that I was not drinking anything because it would have come out my nose!)

Aug 09, 2011 02:46 AM #13
Rainmaker
189,766
Clint Miller
Real Estate Pipeline, Inc. - Missoula, MT

Diana -- :-) I was tearing up laughing when I read this...

Aug 09, 2011 03:25 AM #14
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