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Hello, I’m an experienced Realtor and you’re an idiot…

Real Estate Agent with Real Estate One

Did you ever hit one of those long-term Realtors who thinks that everyone else in real estate is an idiot because they don’t all do it the way he/she does? It’s particularly maddening when they are also the type that starts most sentences with “I’m not going to let my buyer(seller) do that… or maybe I won’t even show my buyer (seller) your ridiculous offer, unless… or maybe I would never let my buyer (seller) use that type of mortgage company, I’m going to require them to get pre-approved by…


Some of the Realtors that I’ve hit lately, especially in the short sale market have been condescending to the point of being just plain rude. It’s certainly true that I don’t know everything about short sales, but I do think I know right from wrong and how to advise my clients to do what’s right – for them. Perhaps that is the issue; it may not be “right” for these old timers’s clients, at least not in their minds.


This is really a form of bullying, which many Realtors use as what they believe is a negotiating tactic. It’s as tiresome as the agent who whines their way through a litany of issues large and small that they have with the property that you represent as preparation for some low-ball offer that they may have advised their client to thrown in. Both waste time and both are really ego-driven attempts at misdirection to see if they can get the other side to blink or tire out and capitulate.


I’ve even had one of these prima donnas dress me down in front of her client because I didn’t have my client offer the best home warranty for her client – not the one that she always offers her clients. HELLO. I represented the other side, honey. I did the best I could for my client. You saw the warranty well ahead of closing, why didn’t you advise your client to upgrade it, if it wasn’t what you would have offered.


I guess it’s all just human nature. There will always be people in any profession who see it as a zero sum game – in order for them to win, you have to lose. I hope that I try to play the game such that everybody can feel like they won.


I’ve only been at it for 10 years, so I guess that old school agent with 20-30 years in the business will always see me as an idiot who doesn’t know what he’s doing or who is doing it wrong. So, I smile and try to stay calm and let them rant and rage and vent until they’ve run out of steam…and they always run out of steam, because once the hot air is gone, so is the steam. There. See, I feel better already.

Posted by


 Norm Werner

Real Estate One


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Norm Werner 2009-2011 All rights reserved


Ty Lacroix
Envelope Real Estate Brokerage Inc - London, ON

Hi Norm, those kind of agents must move around a bit, I met one yesterday and sounds like your person! lol


Aug 18, 2011 04:32 AM
Pamela Stubbs Rogers
Vero Beach, FL

I like your "zero-sum" analogy, I've had my own experiences with these type and it is painful.  Hang in there and continue doing what you apparently do...exemplify professionalism.

Aug 18, 2011 05:30 AM
Gene Riemenschneider
Home Point Real Estate - Brentwood, CA
Turning Houses into Homes

I know the type.  I also see some people that are so used to doing something a certain way that they think that is the only way to do things.

Aug 18, 2011 05:32 AM
Laura Al-Amery


Thank you for your nice article on hello-i-m-an-experienced-realtor-and-you-re-an-idiot-, I like it. It will help me for my research.


Aug 18, 2011 06:32 AM
Jaime Purcell
AlaskaUSA Mortgage - Juneau, AK

This is one of my most favorite lines ever, and I think I will make it my new motto in life:

So, I smile and try to stay calm and let them rant and rage and vent until they’ve run out of steam…and they always run out of steam, because once the hot air is gone, so is the steam. There. See, I feel better already."

Thanks for sharing!!  IT made me smile as I have been up against a few of the same scenarios lately!

Aug 18, 2011 07:24 AM
Tommy Desmond
Keller Williams - Troy, MI

"I've been in the business _____ years..."

"Wow, haven't you found it really difficult to keep up with how much things have changed since you started way back then? Adapting to the technology must really be challenging."

Aug 18, 2011 07:28 AM

I like to start off all of my relationships with the "other" broker by letting them know up front...."I am looking forward to a great working relationship with you. "  I let them know that I am not an expert in all things having only been in the business for 5 years.  They seem to like that and I have rarely (only once) worked with someone who's ego took over the transaction.   I have luckily had some really GREAT ones!

Aug 18, 2011 09:44 AM
Eugene Lew
RE/MAX equity group - Happy Valley, OR

I've been fortunate enough to not have been treated like this by another agent. The thing is, being civil is the best way to go in any transaction, if you have any desire for it to go in a positive direction. Negative energy is just no good at all whether you get the deal together or not.

Being dressed down by the other agent in your case, undoubtedly put that person in a bad light in front of your client. I know I've had my client dislike the other agent because of how they acted in the transaction, and their responses to me before. Unprofessional behavior makes the agent look bad to the other side, and often if it gets back to the client you're trying represent, it may give a negative light as well.

Aug 19, 2011 02:06 AM
Emmary Simpson
Las Cruces Homes and Land - Las Cruces, NM
Serving Las Cruces, NM

Oh goodness. I hate that "I've been in the business for XYZ years" line. I've only been at it about a year now and I've learned to say, when asked, "A while." I think I even rolled my eyes in front of one of these 'master agents' once. :)

Aug 19, 2011 06:26 AM
Rod Osbeck
Five Star Real Estate - Kentwood, MI

Well, I've been in the business for 27 years and let me tell you how it is....actually, I feel like I don't know jack about real estate after all the changes in the last five years! Good post - I get tired  of the know-it-alls and really appreciate the professionals more.

Aug 19, 2011 09:30 AM
Allyson Hoffman
RE/MAX Properties Northwest - Park Ridge, IL
Making Today's Dreams Tomorrow's Reality!

Norm, you are 100% correct that the behavior you described is offensive.  It drives me crazy too!  However, I don't think its purely associated with agents who have been in the business for any specific length of time.  I think it is more a personality-driven thing as opposed to one developed over many years since I've seen it, unfortunately, in agents who have been around both short and long times in the business.

Aug 20, 2011 06:15 PM
Beverly Femia
BlueCoast Realty Corporation - Hampstead, NC
Broker Realtor Stager - Greater Wilmington, NC Are

Now, this is a GREAT POST and a message we all need to hear time and again.  It is bullying and they do their Clients such a disservice and themselves as well.  Relationships with fellow Realtors are so important to outcome in a tough situations and this business has a lot of them! 

Aug 21, 2011 04:53 AM
Monique Ting
INET Realty Honolulu, HI - Honolulu, HI
Your agent under the sun

Norm, I enjoyed your post (aka rant) and all of the comments. The only thing I have to add Is that I too can't stand bullies...

Aug 23, 2011 02:57 PM
Olga Simoncelli
Veritas Prime, LLC dba Veritas Prime Real Estate - New Fairfield, CT
CONSULTANT, Real Estate Services & Risk Management

Norm - clearly based on the number of comments, you've struck a raw nerve - very common issue! Agree, that sort of behavior is a form of bullying.

Aug 24, 2011 11:39 AM
Carla Freund
Keller Williams Preferred Realty - Raleigh, NC
NC Real Estate Transition & Relocation 919-602-848

You know what, I had several of those agents this year from out of state. They were looking for good deals. The first thing they would say is, "I've been a Realtor for _____________ years!" As someone mentioned above, you know it's going to get worse from there. I ended up not working with any of them because they don't know our market and they made redicilous offers. The same homes did sell for much better. So, all that experience didn't get them anywhere.

Aug 27, 2011 02:35 PM
Kasey & John Boles
Jon Gosche Real Estate, LLC - BoiseMeridianRealEstate.com - Boise, ID
Boise & Meridian, ID Ada/Canyon/Gem/Boise Counties

Wow, 280 comments!  I'd really like to read all of them, but I just don't think I can right now.....your first paragraph is a great example of how agents need to not think and decide for their clients but talk with them and give them advice.  Thinking for them is not representing their best interest. -Kasey


Aug 28, 2011 05:14 PM
Teresa St Martin
Windermere Realty Trust - Portland, OR
Be Part of the Solution

Thanks for the post, dealing with one of those agents right now. Fortunately, the buyers really love the home, so despite the bullying tactics that are feeding the agents ego, we are making progress for the real people whose lives are dependant on this home buying/selling process. Somehow it makes me feel better knowing that I'm not alone. -- Teresa

Aug 30, 2011 06:27 PM
Mike Henderson
Your complete source for buying HUD homes - Littleton, CO
HUD Home Hub - 303-949-5848

I'm adding number 18 of your comments as a potential retort to those comments.

Sep 06, 2011 03:29 PM
Matt Robinson
Professional Investors Guild - Pensacola, FL

Norm, most of the experienced agents in our area are dinosaurs and weren't smart enough to take on short sales when the writing was on the wall that you couldn't survive without them in this market.  They always throw around how many "years" they've been in the business, but the stats always reveal that I've sold twice as many homes in my 10 years that they have in their 30...so who has more knowledge and true experience in the world of real estate? 

You are correct in your assertin, it's just an attempt at bullying, but they are bullying the bigger kid in my instance, and I don't put up with their nonsense.  I hope you won't either.  Keep up the great work for your clients, and your great blogging!

Feb 08, 2012 04:34 AM
Inna Ivchenko
Barcode Properties - Encino, CA
Realtor® • GRI • HAFA • PSC Calabasas CA

It does not really matter if the person is a Realtor or not. That is a special sort of people who always look down on others. 

Nov 04, 2016 10:00 AM