7 Ways to move a negotiation forward

7 Ways to move a negotiation forward

By Adorna Carroll, ABR®, ABRM(SM), e-PRO®, GRI, PMN, SFR, SRES®, Owner/Broker, Realty 3 Carroll & Agostini, Berlin, Connecticut

An excerpt from REBAC's Monthly Newsletter, The Today's Buyer's Rep.


Avoid deadlock! If your negotiation is struggling, here are seven tactics and techniques that can help get things moving in the right direction again.

1. Take a time out. If tempers have flared, suggest revisiting the conversation when you’ve both had an opportunity to rethink options. Apologize for losing your temper (even if you didn’t) so that the stage is set for cooperation instead of combat.

2. Reestablish common ground on a personal level with the other negotiator. Rebuilding rapport can go a long way. Soften your approach and compliment the other negotiator’s strengths as a person and as a professional.

3. Bring in some “new” information. For example, “Since we last spoke, we got pre-approved for a loan, rather than just having a pre-qualification.” New information allows you to reopen the conversation and pick up where you left off, rather than starting over again.

4. Change the negotiator. This is an extremely effective tactic, one that alters the personalities involved and opens up the potential for resolution. The substitute does not have to be of equal stature and experience, but someone who will modify the dynamics of the situation by virtue of their different personality.

5. Change the venue. When negotiators are deeply invested, a change of venue (breakfast, coffee, dinner, a golf game) can dramatically modify the tension and reopen the door to creative solutions. It also reestablishes rapport between professionals and allows each to take a step back. 

6. Changing levels. Often times, we see a manager or owner step into a difficult negotiation to alter the playing field. Sometimes, however, when a stalemate occurs between experienced seasoned agents, it’s a great idea to throw a new agent into the mix since they bring no baggage to the negotiation at hand. 

7. Use fairness as a tactic. Most people want to be perceived as fair, so if you position your offer as “fair” there is pressure on the other side to accept because they also want to be perceived as fair. If they disagree, it’s up to them to respond with something that is “more fair.”

The Bottom Line. Ultimately, our primary objective in any negotiation is to achieve satisfaction for whomever we are negotiating. Even though we strive for “win-win” outcomes, there is a huge difference between an actual win-win and a perceived win-win. Sometimes perception is reality. And perceived success yields satisfaction for the parties involved. In essence, even a “bad deal” can feel good.