Top Thirty Things You Will Never Hear A Southern Boy Say ~ Humor From the Sunset Beach Team

Real Estate Broker/Owner with Sunset Beach and Beyond Realty
THE TOP 30 THINGS THAT YOU WILL NEVER HEAR A SOUTHERN BOY SAY:   30. When I retire, I'm movin' north.   29. I'll take Shakespeare for 1000, Alex.   28. Duct tape won't fix that. 27. Come to think of it, I'll have a Heineken 26. We don't keep firearms in this house. 25. You can't feed that to the dog. 24. No kids in the back of the pickup, it's just not safe. 23. Wrestling is fake. 22. We're vegetarians. 21. Do you think my gut is too big? 20. I'll have grapefruit and grapes instead of biscuits  and gravy. 19. Honey, we don't need another dog. 18. Who gives a damn who won the Civil War? 17. Give me the small bag of pork rinds.   16. Too many deer heads detract from the decor. 15. I just couldn't find a thing at Wal-Mart today. 14. Trim the fat off that steak.   13. Cappuccino tastes better than espresso. 12. The tires on that truck are too big. 11. I've got it all on the C: DRIVE.   10. Unsweetened tea tastes better.  9. My fiance, Bobbie Jo, is registered at Tiffany's.  8. I've got two cases of Zima for the Super Bowl.  7. Checkmate  6. She's too young to be wearing a bikini.  5. Hey, here's an episode of "Hee Haw" that we  haven't seen.  4. I don't have a favorite college team.  3. You Guys.  2. Bring me a cup of Latte, Dear. AND THE NUMBER ONE THING THAT YOU WILL NEVER HEAR A SOUTHERN BOY SAY:                                  1. Nope, no more for me. I'm driving!  

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Jennifer Chiongbian
Specializing in all types of Manhattan apts & townhouses - Manhattan, NY
Real Estate Broker - NYC

Ha! Ha!  Thanks for the Sunday humour pick me up.  Have a safe and happy Labor Day weekend!

Sep 04, 2011 04:52 AM #1
Kathy Streib
Room Service Home Staging - Delray Beach, FL
Home Stager - Palm Beach County,FL -561-914-6224

Frank and Karen- I was trying to read through them all to pick out my favorite but I just can't!!! I love them all and they're all true!

Sep 04, 2011 05:58 AM #2
Tony & Darcy Cannon
Aubrey and Associates Realty - Layton, UT
The C Team

ROFL, Very funny.  I love it!  What's wrong with Hee Haw?  Have a great weekend!

Sep 04, 2011 06:04 AM #3
Ed Gillespie
WealthWise Mortgage Planning, a Division of American Pacific Mortgage Corporation NMLS #1850 - Folsom, CA

Priceless!  Thanks so much for this.  Passing it along to friends and family!

Sep 04, 2011 07:18 AM #4
Liz and Bill Spear
RE/MAX Elite 513.520.5305 - Mason, OH
RE/MAX Elite Warren County OH (Cincinnati/Dayton)

LOL! :)  As a Southern Boy by upbringing I can relate to them..... don't forget the most famous words you WILL hear from a Southern Boy, their last words "Hey, Watch This!!" :)  Bill

Sep 04, 2011 10:11 AM #5
Richard Iarossi
Coldwell Banker Residential Brokerage - Crofton, MD
Crofton MD Real Estate, Annapolis MD Real Estate

Frank and Karen.

These are just priceless...especially since there is always a grain of truth in good humor.


Sep 04, 2011 11:38 AM #6
Richard D. Chapin
Arizona Elite Commercial - Payson, AZ
PLLC - Commercial Real Estate

Gotta love the south. That was funny part of what makes it funny is so much of it is true. Thanks for the laugh.

Sep 04, 2011 02:38 PM #7
Scott Warga
ACSI American Construction Specialists & Investigations - Gilbert, AZ

I was laughing all the way through this.

I think my favorite was:

7. Checkmate

Sep 05, 2011 04:56 PM #8
Phil Leng
Retired - Kirkland, WA
Phil Leng - Retired

Hi Frank,

Pretty funny.

A few I missed. Must not be from the South


Sep 09, 2011 01:02 AM #9
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Karen Baker

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