There is not a year that goes by that I am not surprisingly raw from 9/11. I believe that all of us have tremendous emotions regarding this point in history & it has certainly changed the lives of "everyone". So, I know that there are so many stories, and the tragedy speaks in volumes, especially with the 1st responders that are still with us, & the families of the responders that we miss & we lost that tragic day, our continued losses in our troops. I have not discussed my feelings much on this subject, or my background with those involved in this group, as I feel I need to respectfully keep things separated professionally.
http://youtu.be/cLj4akmncsA I wish I had his photo, but it will come up when you click on the link.
I had changed my profile to the photo that is the primary picture that I have still in my mind that day. It was followed by my neighbor frantically knocking on my door to see if I was home, or on that plane & a barrage of phone calls, the first was my mother. You will see it in the first photo below.
In one of my other posts that I posted in tribute to Joey, on "Second Chances", I shared a blip about a number of second chances that I have had in my life. I feel that 9/11 represents one of them. I lost several coworkers that day, & I could have been any one of them. They awoke to do their job, just like I do, when it is my turn, & with that same sense of security for the day ahead.
Many of us had survivor’s guilt as a result after these events, & the only way to move forward is to try to make the time that you are given count! Just as Peter states in his video. Peter's You Tube video that I am sharing, is a testimony from one colleague, that says "volumes" of how close to the event ,& the emotions that followed for many of us as a group that day. He is gearing it as a dedication to his church, & wishes for others to do as well. This is his way of placing it forward for "the gift" of "life" that he received...& one that we all should be appreciative.
There is not a step, not a breath that lacks in gratefulness, and shock. We are vulnerable beyond doubt.
I was disturbed afterward for a while, as these reports came forward. I felt that we had been taken for granted...especially in the aviation industry, as no one in ticketing, or especially the crew members had been made aware of any security information that may have possibly had, if yet, a small influence on the events that day. It became public that there were numerous warnings, had our CEO's not disclosed this to us? The FAA?? How could so many warnings not have reached us with the importance of our jobs?? I realize that it is in God's hands, but there is a certain amount that you may think is fair to consider?
This was how I felt. I felt worried about the surviving families & the lives that were suddenly taken. I wasn't sure the exposure with my family or my future in my industry. I was just in shock for days, as I had literally just been right there & out of both airports every month for most of my career. If I was not laying over, I was doing turns so I would be home by 4pm when my daughter got out of school..... The first 10 years of my employer were turns out of Boston, Newark, JFK, LaGuardia, & Chicago....later as the scheduling evolved & my daughter grew older I was able to sometimes hold long layovers in the city. My "escape" so to speak, I could work, but enjoy being away, a little now. An escape, while I was assisting my husband trying to build our former business. I have some items that have to be protected because of the security of the position. None of what I will share is of nature that it is not already public. These are public memories that I will share.
It is difficult to abbreviate this recap as the ripple continues still for all of us as a nation, and even globally. I will highlight the events that stood out & brought emotion for me, especially as a crew member. This is the first memory I have of September 11th, as my neighbor Kitty is knocking frantically on my door, I have just turned on CNN as I always did with my coffee. I was groggy from the flight from Newark, being late the night before & had just gotten my 1st cup of coffee. Then everything went into over drive & became so surreal....it was beyond words...
This is one of the first excerpts I could find that brought just incredible anger, beyond what I had & I did indeed read this in a famous magazine; in fact it was cover report of the warnings. I couldn't remember if it was Time or Newsweek..."Google says Newsweek". This was copied & pasted from the search results on Google.
www.americanprogress.org/kf/911tc.doc
You +1'd this publicly.
Undo File Format: Microsoft Word - Quick View
Newsweek also reported "that as many as 10 to 12 warnings" were issued before ... New York Times reported that in the lead-up to 9/11, Attorney General John Ashcroft.… According to Time Magazine, President Bush is far “cozier than most ...
A Tribute & Remembrance for me ~ w/ "In My Seat" You Tube by F/O Peter Scheibner. (A Pilot's Story from Sept 10th - 11th. (Original comment "If you would like to use this video for your church service on September 11th feels free to stream it from this link.") ...) you may want to have tissues handy.
http://youtu.be/cLj4akmncsA (THIS IS THE VIDEO)
I was angry, extremely angry, with the reports of the warnings, & all the lives being taken for granted. My feelings were "Do they think we are disposable?" "Who was responsible for deciding NOT to share this information?" (Especially as a crew member in our responsibility to protect those with us).
Of course, it is human, that I also had my worry with the fate of my family. My mother went into the hospital that day; she was there for 6 days. She knew I was flying New York layovers, she knew that I flew Purser on the trips on wide bodies. Even after she spoke to me, the shock had a ripple through her that caused her to vomit & she dehydrated & it was a cycle for the term of her hospital stay until she finally stabilized with me there daily as reassurance. She initially visualized me on one of those planes. She came out for not even a week & went back in for 3 days with chest pains. I wasn't sure they would give it to me as a crew member, but I sought out more life insurance to protect my family, as now there were factors that were of a different nature. I never knew that they had a policy that they could shoot our plane down in such an event. It explained some other things for me...but did not make it settle. So many ripples for families, divorce, illness, layoffs, pay cuts, even today that have still not been restored....all of which was none of their fault. Actually, my husband asked for a divorce over the phone from Spain, on 9/27/01, over all of the tension, uncertainty that had built up during those weeks. We are still close friends despite, but it happened a LOT, especially in our company that had two incomes with the company & pay cuts average of 38% each....again, through no fault of theirs.
September 11th should always be honored & remembered for those that lost their lives that day. Heroes that tried to rescue others selfishly & those people that keep our nation running, in innocence of what was about to be their fate. Some as have been recorded, tried to maintain their responsibilities above all else. They leave behind families, loved ones, friends & co-workers who post loudly "WE REMEMBER". It has forever changed our world. The industry that I have spent approaching 30 years. I don't believe that first responders get the credit they deserve either. I just read a report that because of the number / volume of them that they have been asked to not be at the ceremonies... I have to hopefully think that this is also out of protection for their safety...but I am not sure & would hope that it is not out of the initial way it was put forth.
Even today we have a report, so I am doubly concerned- 1) as to how they were allowed into the country?, 2) Are they going to put those 1st responders at risk after all, 3) Now, the first responders will be required to be there because of this, after they were advised initially to stay away?
http://au.news.yahoo.com/world/a/-/world/10221337/newly-released-tapes-reveal-9-11-horror
I wanted to post especially the public testimony by F/O Peter Scheibner & request respectfully for others that may have a venue to put it forward.
If there is a confusion as to my interest here on Active Rain. I have two occupations, plus care for my family & look out for my parents. I am trying to build a future hopefully with my other passion, as our retirements & standard of living have been forever been changed. I wanted to share that "WE REMEMBER" 9/11, & for me, I will never forget, also please don't forget flights #800 & one that is also dearest to my heart flight #587.
(the photo of me yesterday 4am...for the subject of recent photos) (there are thousands of crew members that try to have or have two careers because of pay cuts or instability in the industry, many are in or have been in Real Estate & may be here on Active Rain - I am a "newbie"~I have thought about forming a group of Aviation interests, as I know about 10 agents that fly in Miami alone, but we have different schedules obviously) A diverse group with many talents...mine though is not writing. However, I do write pure & what is on my mind & in my heart.
Photos courtesy of Google or are family.
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