Q&A Self-Sabotage, or Client-Centric Communication?
Chapter Eleven from the book Less Blah Blah More Ah Ha - How social savvy real estate agents become trusted, preferred, referred and rewarded.
“Who speaks, sows. Who listens, reaps.” ~ Argentine Proverb
They meet. Sam and Ella share their important concerns and ask questions. Before the last syllable leaves their lips, in know-it-all fashion Tony gushes and spews his one-size-fits-all answers. Sure, their words entered his ear holes—he heard their words, but he wasn’t really listening, so he doesn’t precisely understand what they were really saying. In his haste to impress and progress, he didn’t invest the care or time to pause and ask thoughtful follow-up questions. As a result, he failed to grasp the core essence of Sam and Ella’s important-to-them questions and concerns: what they truly want, expect, or need, or what they fear and want to avoid.
This form of self-sabotage is all too common. When we don’t understand the true essence of our clients’ important-to-them questions, we fail them. By not asking the right follow-up questions, we’re self-sabotaging our own success. Even worse, we’re doing our clients a disservice -- Fail!!
Overestimating and Underestimating
I don’t want to suggest that this happens all the time with all of us, but it happens enough times for it to be worrisome. We overestimate what we think we know and underestimate what we don’t know. In our business, we hear the same sort of questions dozens if not hundreds of times. When we hear a familiar question, in a rush to impress and progress, there’s a tendency to answer the question, or address the concern based on our previous positive experiences with other people. This is a big problem.
Why?
Because, while each person’s questions and concerns may be similar in circumstance, the reality is that these questions and concerns are based on their unique personal experiences, expectations, fears, and desires. Sure, we’ve heard and answered similar questions over and over again, but it’s their first time asking us these questions, and their circumstances and perspectives are unique to them. The core essence of each client’s questions and concerns--or what they truly want, expect, or need -- is different, even when on the surface it appears that they are not. So, when our answers and solutions are generic and sized to fit all, the odds of them hitting their target, earning their trust, and making them happy, are razor-slim. Not only is this a disservice to our clients, we’re also self-sabotaging our success.
Thankfully, this form of self-spoken-sabotage and disservice can be easily fixed. When our exchange of questions and answers (Q&A) is thoughtful and thorough, understanding is strong, trust is earned, and our clients are served as they wish to be. Remember The Golden Rule 2.0 from Chapter Seven, “Do unto others as they would have done unto themselves”? If we keep that in mind we’ll stay on course and everyone goes, “Yea!”
Let’s take a look at what wrong and right sound like. Imagine overhearing this lame exchange at an important listing appointment. In attendance were two highly motivated sellers and Tony, an unskilled agent.
Listing Appointment – Scenario#1 – The Lame Exchange
Motivated Sellers: Our last agent never stayed in touch. We’d like regular communication. How often will you report to us?
Unskilled Agent: I communicate with all my clients on a weekly basis, I mail a monthly follow-up report, and I e-mail a bi-weekly showing report. All my clients love this; I run a market-activity-update every three weeks. I’m available 24/7, you can call me anytime; yak-yak, blah-blah, yada-yada.
At first blush, it sounds like Tony’s keep-’em-in-the-loop communication and stay-in-touch program is pretty snazzy, right? He’s sharing what he believes is a fantastic follow-up and communication strategy. His last client loved it and he thinks it’s better than what the other agents in his office are doing. It doesn’t really sound like a lame exchange at all, does it? But it is. Here’s why.
What he doesn’t know—because he’s never asked—is his client’s definition of regular communication and follow-up. Or what they think fantastic looks and feels like. He doesn’t know their preferred frequency, which method of delivery they prefer (phone, in person, mail, e-mail, text, etc.), or what specific types of information they want. He doesn’t know diddly-squat about their specific expectations, concerns, or desires. All he knows is that they said they want regular communication and follow-up.
Yes, there’s a snowball’s chance that Tony’s generic answer might satisfy his clients’ needs, but what if Sam and Ella’s expectations are completely different, or even slightly different? Earlier in this book we learned that the vast majority of sellers and buyers contact two agents. What if the other agent listens and understands just slightly or miles more about Sam and Ella’s expectations, wants, and needs? In this instance, Tony wouldn’t just have shot himself in his right foot, he would have blown both feet completely off, along with an opportunity to take a salable listing. Equal bummer, Tony will have lost potential sign calls, Internet leads, repeat business, and referral recommendations as well.
What would happen if, instead of rushing to proudly answer, he asked a few clarifying questions instead? Let’s find out
Listing Appointment – Scenario #2 – Crystal-Clear Client-Centric Conversation
Motivated Sellers: Our last agent never stayed in touch. We’d like regular communication. How often will you report to us?
Skilled Agent: Sorry to hear that, Ella. Regular communication can mean different things to different people and I want to make sure I’m delivering precisely what you want. So I’d like to ask a couple of questions. Would that be okay? [Waits for seller’s approval].
When you say “regular communication,” can we nail down what that looks like for you? For instance, how often would you like an update, what kind of information is important to you, and in what form? I can get you whatever you need—recent market activity, showing agent feedback, marketing activity, things like that—and report back to you by phone, e-mail, snail mail, in person, or however you prefer it. Let’s talk about how you’d like to be kept in the loop.
Motivated Sellers: Wow, Tony! You’re really different from our last agent; you really listen and ask questions to understand what we want. You must have read that really awesome book: Less Blah Blah More Ah Ha. We love you and we’ll sign right now. Plus, we’re going to pay you a big fat juicy bonus. Plus-plus and super-plus, we’re gonna send you a never-ending stream of qualified buyers and seller referrals!
Okay, I was just having fun with that last paragraph. The point is, if we put ourselves in the seat of the seller, we can understand how asking thoughtful and thorough questions will lead to crystal-clear and precise communication, which leads to delighted and loyal clients. On top of all that, you’ll feel good and proud of how you do what you do.
Be sure to ask thoughtful and thorough questions, before you answer your clients’ questions, even if you’ve heard them dozens or hundreds of times before. To help keep you on track, here’s a simple four-step Crystal-Clear Communication model for answering questions effectively.
Step One: Gain Understanding and Clarity Step Two: Confirm Mutual Understanding Step Three: Share Your Answer/Solution Step Four: Achieve Agreement
Step One: Gain Understanding and Clarity
After the question is asked, smile, breathe, and relax. To identify, clarify, and understand the true essence of their question(s) or concern(s), ask follow-up questions, such as:
You get the picture, right? Ask your follow-up questions in a conversational tone with a relaxed body posture. By taking the time to really understand your clients’ needs, desires and fears, you’re providing a positive and powerful service to them and to yourself. Enjoy the interaction adventure and smile.I appreciate how you feel, please tell me more about. . .
Could you please elaborate on that. . . Can you describe how/when . . .
Step Two: Confirm Mutual Understanding
When you’re finished asking your follow-up questions, confirm that your understanding matches the true essence of their questions or concerns, by feeding this back and asking if you are on track. If they say yes, congratulations -- you understand them perfectly. But before we move to the next step, I want you to ask if there’s anything else they are concerned about. If there is, listen, and repeat Step One.
Continuing the client-centric listing appointment scenario, Step Two – Confirm Mutual Understanding -- might sound like this:
Skilled Agent: Thanks. Let’s see if I understand what’s important to you. Your last agent didn’t follow up or communicate effectively. What you’d like is a weekly telephone call, and I heard you say Wednesday evening would be best. You’d also like a weekly e-mail summary showing appointment feedback, marketing effort updates, and any new market activity in your neighborhood. Ella, you’d like to be the point of contact; Sam, my man, you’d like to be copied in on the e-mail update. Does that sum it up?
Motivated Seller: Yes.
Skilled Agent: Is there anything else about my communication or follow-up with you that we haven’t covered, but is important to you? I don’t want to miss anything.
Motivated Seller: Nope, you’ve got it. Thanks for really listening.
Asking follow-up questions and confirming that your understanding is crystal-clear and matches the true essence of their questions and concerns is universally appreciated. It also demonstrates your keen interest in what’s important to them. This approach easily separates you from the unskilled masses. Everyone wins when you use this Four-Step Model. It works like magic in business, and all your other relationships too. Give it try.
Now that we’ve confirmed we understand our clients’ questions and concerns, we move to Step Three, which is where we share our answers/solutions.
Step Three: Share Your Answers/Solutions
When we ask appropriate follow-up questions and the client confirms our crystal-clear understanding, we know exactly what’s important to them. In essence, our client has shared exactly what they are looking for. All we have to do at this point is share our tailored to exactly match what they’re looking for answers and solutions. Of course, as always, relax, smile, and share your answers in a conversational and confident manner.
Here’s an example:
Skilled Agent: Per your expectations and preferences, I’ll report to you weekly by phone, Wednesday evening, between 7 p.m and 8 p.m. We’ll discuss anything important to you, showing appointment feedback, a marketing campaign update, and any new market activity in your neighborhood. Ella, you’ll be the primary point of contact, and Sam, I’ll be sure to cc you on the e-mail updates.
Follow these three Steps, and then finish strong by moving to Step Four.
Step Four: Gain Agreement
This step will sound duh-obvious, but the unskilled leave it out because they haven’t read this book and/or they fear a negative response. Traditional sales education teaches us that salespeople need to close and ask for the order. I like to think of the close and asking for the order as simply asking if their needs have been met, are they happy, and if we have their agreement to move forward. By asking if our answers and solutions are on the mark, we’re doing what others call closing and you and I will call gaining agreement and permission to move forward.
Here’s an example:
Skilled Agent: I think I’ve covered all the important points. Do you both feel that I’ve answered your questions and addressed your communication and follow-up concerns in a fully satisfactory way?
Motivated Sellers: Yeah, it sounds good, dude.
Skilled Agent: Great. Then as far as my communication and follow-up commitment are concerned, we’re in agreement. Let’s move forward.
The Take Away
What positive impact would you and your clients experience, if both of you were dancing in perfect communication rhythm? This crystal-clear and client-centric Four Step Q&A model works equally well with clients, prospects, lovers, significant others, and co-workers. In fact, it works with all humans. Use this four-step strategy and you’re on your way to real estate rock star status, raving fans, more listings, more sales, and fewer problems and misunderstandings.
As great as all this sounds, you’ll do even better (yes, it really is possible) when you become a consummate storyteller. Find out how in the next Chapter.
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Thanks for reading. If I can be helpful, let me know - Ken Brand 832-797-1779. If you'd like to own the book Less Blah Blah More Ah Ha, it's available on Amazon.com in both paper and eBook/Kindle versions. CLICK HERE to go there.
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