The Best Exercises to Prepare for Ski Season

The Best Exercises To Prepare for Ski Season

Ski season is here!  With A-Basin and Loveland ski areas open, and the others soon to follow, the following is a list of exercises to help you prepare for the 2011-2012 Ski Season!

• Buy a new pair of gloves and immediately throw one away.
• If you have children, buy at least 10 pairs of gloves and throw out all the right hands.
• Soak your gloves in water and store them in the freezer prior to every use. 
•  If you wear glasses, begin wearing them with glue smeared on the lenses.
• Throw away a $100 dollar bill - now.
• Start wearing a helmet as part of your daily outfit.
• Find the nearest ice rink and walk across the ice 20 times in your ski boots carrying two pairs of skis, accessory bag and poles.
• Pretend you are looking for your car… for at least 30 minutes.
•  Sporadically drop things, chapstick, glasses, money, driver license, keys etc.
• Place a small but angular pebble in your shoes, line the shoes with crushed ice, and then tighten a C-clamp around your toes.
• Go to McDonald's and insist on paying $10.50 for a hamburger.
• Be sure you are in the longest line at every available opportunity.
• Drive slowly for five hours - anywhere - as long as it's in a snowstorm and you're following an 18 wheeler.
• Fill a blender with ice, hit the pulse button and let the spray blast your face…Leave the ice on your face until it melts…Let it drip into your clothes.
• Clip a lift ticket to the zipper of your jacket and ride a motorcycle fast enough to make the ticket lacerate your face.
• Dress up in as many clothes as you can possibly put on, and then proceed to take them off because you have to go to the bathroom.
•  Slam your thumb in a car door…Don't go see a doctor.

Repeat all of the above every Saturday and Sunday until it's time for the real thing!