There are some things that are just uncomfortable to have to talk about. I was raised to be polite and to consider others before speaking. But darn it, sometimes something simply must be said. Here goes. Before you move out,CLEAN THE STINKING HOUSE!
I realize that you're excited about your new place. I'm sure it's beautiful. But come on. Remember those sweet people you met at the closing yesterday? Remember how you chatted with them about the neighborhood and told them important things like when trash pick up was? Remember how excited they were about their new home (your house) too? I think I heard you tell your REALTOR that they were so cute.
You really should see them now. The moving truck is parked on the driveway filled to the brim. Their family and friends are at the ready with pizza and beer wanting to help them unload and unpack. They can't wait to see the "dream house" they've been hearing about for the last month. Yep, they're definitely cute!
But the thing is, nothing has been unloaded. Nope. They're actually feeling a bit embarrassed to have their friends stop by. But they really need the help.
Unfortunately, when they entered their new home for the first time, they found a mess. Looks like before the fun can begin they will have to clean up after the previous resident, cough, YOU.
Like I said, you really should see them. Right now they are up to their elbows cleaning all the gunk you left in the bathroom drawers. I guess you were done with that broken eye shadow, huh? They've had to hire a truck to pick up all the trash you left piled in the garage. Good thing you mentioned garbage day. That was very helpful of you. The best is yet to come. Later today they get to go out in the backyard and scoop all the poop before their kids can play out there. How cute is that?
Folks, leave things the way you would want to find it. Before you move out, CLEAN THE STINKING HOUSE!
Talk to you soon!
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