The Art of Disconnection

By
Real Estate Agent with Keller Williams Realty 0575737

The topic on the agenda for day is disconnection. You would not believe in reading REALTOR web sites how many offer their lives up as 24/7 warriors to provide excellent "customer service" to their clients. How do they fit in sleep? Maybe they sleep walk? To me 24/7 is not service it's craziness. No one can devote all their time to the business side of life. Get real. If you are 24/7 you don't have a life. Some REALTORS wear this as a badge of honor, but to me, it reflects complete lack of balance. I once heard that with boundaries you teach people how to treat you. If you're available "whenever" then I think you may as well tell everyone you work in a slave labor environment. Your clients are your master. Kid Disconnect

Note to self: You need to learn the "Art of Disconnection." It's really not that hard once you learn the first step. It's called the word "NO!" Yes, there is an exclamation point with that word. As your emails and paperwork pile up you start taking back and editing your life with more No's. No to every athletic sport your kid wants to enroll in. No to taking more business than you can handle. No to all the social events everyone wants you to go to. No to all those educational classes available (do take some though). The second step is to time block your week for their time and your time. If Friday afternoon is your rest and relaxation part of the Monday through Friday grind then put on your calendar "Meeting with Bob" or some other non-relevant item. Only you know Bob is your quiet walk in the park at 3 p.m.

By learning the Art of Disconnection you will find more energy in your life and feel totally comfortable with not answering the phone and email for certain periods of your day. You are not BAD. You are BALANCED! Your family will rediscover you. Do you know how to disconnect? Or are you still in the training wheels stage of this art?

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Rainer
12,630
Aggie Friend Kay Perry, A&M Class of '94 & '97
Kay Perry, Broker - College Station, TX
Gary, Hurrah for you writing this post.  No is not an easy word to learn but it is a must to keep a balanced life.  I plan on relaxing all weekend and enjoying my family.
Nov 30, 2007 09:20 AM #1
Rainmaker
354,363
Melanie Ross
Coldwell Banker Solano Pacific - Benicia, CA
Benicia CA & Vallejo CA Real Estate, 707-319-2828

Thank you for writing this as we should see this and do it!!  Our manager this morning said in our sales meeting, work hard, but take time off and not half a day.  Mark a day off and keep it.  Still hard for me but if I think and plan it, I will do it!

Nov 30, 2007 09:20 AM #2
Rainmaker
643,395
Marchel Peterson
Results Realty - Spring, TX
Spring TX Real Estate E-Pro
Gary, it was not easy but I have learned how to say NO!  I have even learned how to refer a client if I happened to be planning a trip.  My life is much happier because of it.  Life is too short to let real estate control it.
Nov 30, 2007 11:11 AM #3
Ambassador
1,887,156
Gary Woltal
Keller Williams Realty - Flower Mound, TX
Assoc. Broker Realtor SFR Dallas Ft. Worth
I think those who figure out how to balance their lives are way ahead of the pack!
Nov 30, 2007 01:26 PM #4
Rainmaker
340,215
Judy Greenberg
Coldwell Banker Long Grove - Buffalo Grove, IL
Coldwell Banker - Buffalo Grove - Long Grove Homes

In the long run, do our children remember one more deal or the time you spent with them at the beach?  What happened before we had cell phones?  Was life easier then.  I'm beginning to turn off my cell phone at times.  You can always call people back!

Nov 30, 2007 02:33 PM #5
Ambassador
254,583
Melissa Grant
A Serendipity World - Greenbackville, VA
The Law of Attraction In Life & Business

This is a terrific post ! Just so you know I added you to this weeks Week in Review ! Merry Christmas

Week In Review 11/25/2007 - 12/02/2007

Dec 02, 2007 10:39 PM #6
Rainer
5,050
Linda Giordano
Keller Williams Realty - Nashua, NH
Southern New Hampshire Real Estate
This is so true! There are agents in my office who run around 7 days a week! I'm mentoring an agent who is starting to do this also. I'm preaching the concept of scheduling your time off to be with your family. You should work to live, not live to work!
Dec 02, 2007 11:44 PM #7
Rainer
129,332
Therese VanderMeer
Midwest Properties of MI - Grand Rapids - Jenison, MI
Realtor-Greater Grand Rapids, MI area communities

Gary:  In my last occupation I learned the "Art of Disconnection" the hard and painful way...as a means of survival.  Now I schedule everything on my calendar and if I have time blocked out for family time or activity (sport events etc...) I simply state I have another commitment at that time and request we look for an alternative.  I very seldom have a problem with this. 

Without balance in our lives we will be miserable and more often than not the people whom we care about the  most will also be miserable.

Great advice and post!
Dec 03, 2007 04:59 AM #8
Rainer
13,122
Mary Ann Grafft
Keller Williams Realty - Lubbock, TX

The Art of Saying No is an excellent book and can be life changing.  Being 24/7 to your clients will not make them respect you!

Dec 03, 2007 06:40 AM #9
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Gary Woltal

Assoc. Broker Realtor SFR Dallas Ft. Worth
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