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Perception is Reality in Real Estate

By
Real Estate Agent with Associate Broker, Momentum Realty

Buying or Selling a home can be very stressful. Hiring a Realtor can help, but cannot entirely prevent, missteps along the way.


As a party to the transaction, you will be called upon to respond at different points in the transaction. How you react--and even when--can affect how the other side views your offer.  Does this matter? It couple dancingcan. 

I recently worked with a move-up buyer. They found the house of their dreams and submitted an offer. The sellers countered. The buyers, understandably nervous, took some time to think about the counter and how they wanted to respond. The sellers interpreted this as either arrogance or indifference (it was never clear which) and became very aggressive in their negotiating posture. For almost a week we went back and forth, with each side becoming increasingly annoyed. In the end we came to agreement, but both parties were burnt out and and irritated by the other.They weren't annoyed so much at the negotiations, but rather how the other party responded.

The truth is, both parties were making a big decision and an important one for their future. How someone will react in this situation is hugely varied. Some people will become laser focused and want to move quickly and decisively. Others will become reflective and want to move forward with deliberation. Neither is right or wrong, but when both parties behave differently, it can make what would otherwise be simple negotiations turn to tense ones.

Of course, keeping unproductive behavior of the other party from your client is one of the things we Realtors try to do. In this situation, it wasn't possible since the one party wanted to see response deadlines (which is not customary in Virginia).

As you negotiate for the sale or purchase of your home, remember that your actions and responses may not be interpreted with your original intent. In a negotiation scenario, it doesn't matter what your intent was, it only matters how the other side interprets what you say or do.

Negotiations are dance. One party makes a move and the other party responds accordingly. Just as not all couples can dance in tandem, not all parties to a negotiation will work easily together. 

As you prepare to buy or sell your home remember that, in most cases, both parties have the same objective; to get the transaction to closing. While you work together to come to agreement on the terms, don't lose sight of the goal for short term gratification and satisfaction. 
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 Momentum Realty

A GREAT Real Estate  experience.

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Comments (5)

Charlie Dresen
The Group, Inc - Steamboat Springs, CO
Steamboat Springs, CO e-Pro

Great reminder that we sometimes forget that interpretations and perceptions can be very detrimental when they are not in-line with the other party's intentions. We have contractual deadlines in place here in CO for responses on key actions and that definitely facilitates the process. When those deadlines are not part of the contractual agreement and someone expects them because their previous transactions did have them, it can be an instant red flag for someone who is process oriented. In that case, the other party's not dragging their feet in responding becomes even more important.

Mar 20, 2012 09:36 PM
Tracy Oliva
West USA Realty - Arizona - Fountain Hills, AZ
The Oliva Team Arizona Agents

Holly this is some good Info for all,good luck with your business and good luck in 2012,   E

Mar 20, 2012 09:39 PM
Nor Yeretsian
Envoy Capitol Realty Inc. - Toronto, ON
Envoy Capitol Realty Inc., Brokerage Toronto

Well said Holly. 

The realtors need to also remember that they should remain rational and not 

cause more stress to the process - keep your client's end game in perspective throughout.

cheers

Nor

www.envoycapitol.com 

Mar 20, 2012 09:44 PM
Holly Weatherwax
Associate Broker, Momentum Realty - Reston, VA
A Great Real Estate Experience

Charlie, You are right on, one party was from a state where they were accustomed to deadlines and one wasn't.

Ed, Thanks for stopping by.

Nor, Realtors can definitely fuel the fire if they are not careful. I am big believer in stepping back from the situation and thinking it through before reacting. We are often just the messenger, no need to make a situation more emotionally charged than it already is.

Mar 20, 2012 10:02 PM
Kathy Sheehan
Bay Equity, LLC 770-634-4021 - Atlanta, GA
Senior Loan Officer

When I sold real estate, time for acceptance was at presentation of the offer.  It kept things moving quickly.

Mar 20, 2012 11:24 PM