I had a frustrating experience this week where a person with whom I have a business relationship failed me. It was nothing major; she missed a meeting, causing me to rearrange some other tasks. It was not a big deal, but then she proceeded to tell me that she decided to go shopping, and that it was my fault that the meeting was not re-arranged. She was shifting the responsibility to me. Her reason was that she tried to call, but I did not answer the phone. When I am not in the office, I have my calls routed to my cell phone. I may not answer the phone every single time, but I know when a call comes in, and I respond to the calls at an appropriate time. She had not called, but she wanted to defer the blame from herself. I rescheduled the meeting, but I did not comment on the not answering excuse. Later her boss calls me to check on things, but she informs me of the phone excuse, and tells me that I should do better, since it was really my fault. I was flabbergasted. I mentioned that her employee had not called me, which led to a raised voice reinforcing the fact that I was to blame. With this, I thought I should take my business elsewhere.
I am not perfect, and I know that others make mistakes. In the case above, I knew that I had not been to blame. I mention this example, because later in the week, another situation arose that brought the idea of responsibility to my mind. I was listening to the baseball commissioner Bud Selig responding to the report about steroid usage. The report stated that we should move on to find a solution to this problem. I really do not care about the records; my main concern is the impact of this news on the young. Steroid usage being acceptable by so many in the sport sends the idea to others that drug usage is alright and that we should do whatever it takes to get ahead. Two messages that I do not want my children to hear. Selig appeared to be skirting the issue, while trying to say that he will take steps to rectify this situation. He never took the advice of the report to apologize, do not shift blame, and then move forward. I think this is easy enough to do, but maybe it is our nature to set blame aside from ourselves.
I admit that taking responsibility for our actions does not always sit well with our clients. I have had occurrences where I know that clients or coworkers left with a disappointed feeling, and I truly do not want them to leave with that impression. More often people see the effort to correct, and they come to an understanding. Taking responsibility might not always make our clients appreciate our efforts on every occasion, but more often than not they will come to a better conclusion about our service.
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