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They have to like you before they'll do business with you!!

By
Education & Training with Independent Leadership & Financial Fitness Consultant

This is a marketing piece that I send my clients once a year, and the inspiration of this piece was the master of networking and relationship building himself, Dale Carnegie.  As we get ready to go forth and create new relationships in our industries, let's remember that they first have to like you before they'll trust you!

Karl Christen 2007 

 

Six Ways to Make People Like You
Start by Liking Them!

The book, How to Win Friends & Influence People*, consistently makes the top five whenever there is a survey of most influential or inspiring books, and is often second only to the Bible. Dale Carnegie outlines - in very simple steps and examples - how to be nice without letting yourself get walked on.

The section titled, Six Ways to Make People Like You, reveals six traits kind people of the world share:

Become interested in other people. Note that he doesn't say "show interest," but rather "become interested" - change yourself for real, rather than practicing handy habits. Especially in business, it's critical that we learn to see prospects as people rather than as sales.

Smile. There's probably nothing so positive and contagious as a simple smile. If you have trouble smiling sincerely, get your mind out of the dumps and think about something that will make you smile.

Remember that a person's name is to that person the sweetest and most important sound in any language. If you are not a pro at remembering people's names, become one. If your mind is dividing people into "important" and "not as important", remembering only those names you value, you're at an enormous disadvantage - in addition to being a snob.

Be a good listener and encourage people to talk about themselves. Most folks don't need much encouragement, but those who do will likely thank you for such a great conversation.

Talk in terms of the other person's interests. Reignite your childhood curiosity, and ask questions! When possible, learn in advance what their interests are and spend a few minutes each day researching those topics so you have something to discuss the next time you chat.

Make the other person feel important - and do it sincerely. Notice the talents and abilities of others. Show gratitude to the grocer for not smashing your bread. Admire the speed of the clerk at the DMV. If you can't find something complimentary about another person, you're not looking hard enough.

I hope Carnegie's tips serve as a reminder for how you can make the world a better place.

Call me to discuss additional ways to create raving fans and clients for life!

Karl Christen  ~~  Castle Rock Mortgage Lending

Posted by

Bonnie Erickson
Tangletown Realty - Saint Paul, MN
How quickly "How to Make Friends and Influence People" has become a household phrase.  It's always good to review.  One of the things that has always been important to me is learning the person's name.  I've especially worked hard to do this with immigrants.  If I practice with them in the beginning, it seems to break the ice.  Many times I have asked if their name has a special meaning and the majority of the times it does.  It's fun to know my client's name is beautiful jewel.  It's also fun when an prospective tenant's face lights up when he hands you the written application and you read and pronounce his name correctly.  It definitely makes kudos and pleases the people you meet.  I have a friend whose name is always slaughtered.  It's not hard but is German.  If people had the interest to learn that "ch" is pronounced as "g" when . . . But many people do not care.  They are the ones who didn't read the book!
Jan 05, 2007 05:38 PM
K C
Independent Leadership & Financial Fitness Consultant - Pleasant Grove, UT
Amen Bonnie... I've noticed a remarked change when I practiced the principal of remembering someones name!
Jan 05, 2007 05:41 PM
Kelly Mitchell
The Wine Siren & Agent Caffeine - Napa, CA
TheWineSiren.com Food | Wine | Fab *Napa Valley
Hi Karl - What a wonderful reminder and especially appropriate as we begin the New Year.  
Jan 05, 2007 06:22 PM
Concetta Pepenella-Timmons
Remax Metro Staten Island, New York - Staten Island, NY
Associate Broker
Feels Good reading your post. Thanks Karl!
Jan 05, 2007 07:57 PM
"The Lovely Wife" The One And Only TLW.
President-Tutas Towne Realty, Inc. - Kissimmee, FL

Has anyone who has a career in Sales not read that book? :)

"Thinking Big" is another good one for anyone who intends to make a living in Sales. :)  

TLW...ROAR!

Jan 05, 2007 11:33 PM
Stefan Scholl
Buyer's Broker of Northern Michigan, LLC - Petoskey, MI
Northern Michigan Real Estate
Excellent advice, Karl, although I still have trouble with names once in a while (and no, its not because I'm a snob).
Jan 06, 2007 01:21 AM
Keith Jeppson - Salt Lake City Real Estate
Everest Realty Group - Holladay, UT
Thanks for the reminder Karl.  I've tried the mirror/matching, joining their tribe.  But when it boils down to it.  If you have and show a genuine interest in people, they will love you.
Jan 06, 2007 02:32 AM