Cocktail parties and real estate

Real Estate Agent with Samsel & Associates 0790808

File:Cocktail Party At The Imperial Hotel March 13, 1961 (Tokyo, Japan) (496610682).jpg


Picture yourself at a cocktail party. Perhaps you're wearing your favorite cocktail dress and amazing heels or a perfectly fitted tuxedo. There's the soft hum of conversation, the twinkle of laughter, perhaps some piano music or a string band. Servers pass finger food and drinks and you're enjoying yourself immensely.

Now, compare that to the way you approach social networking. Do you present yourself in the best light, avoiding negative behaviors and negative talk? Do you politely engage in small talk, or instead hand each person your business card and move on? Do you listen as others speak, or are you too focused on giving your best sales pitch to everyone you meet?

If you're using social networking to build your business, remember that the relationship comes first. If the only status updates you ever post on Facebook are advertisements for listings, people will quickly hide your statuses. If the only time you comment on anyone else's posts is to promote your business, people won't take your comments seriously. Instead, use social networking sites like Facebook, Twitter, etc., to help you build relationships. The rest will come naturally.

In the mean time, don't forget to dance.


Related Posts:

Do you have enough Facebook Followers?

Is Social Networking Taking Time away from your Business?

The wrong way to Tweet

6 Common Twitter Mistakes

Realtors Use Twitter?

Posted by




~ Wayne & Jean 

Union County, NJ - a great place to live and work!

If you're looking to buy or sell a property in Union County, call us at 908-917-4189 or email


facebook  Pinterest  LinkedIn  Read Our Blog!

All opinions, information and data provided is deemed reliable but is subject to errors and omissions. Not intended to solicit other Brokers' clients. We cooperate with them fully. 


This entry hasn't been re-blogged:

Re-Blogged By Re-Blogged At
Real Estate Sales and Marketing
POSITIVE ATTITUDE for the Weary Soul
Darryl Davis Seminars Attendees
Inspiration Station
cocktail parties

Post a Comment
Spam prevention
Spam prevention
Show All Comments
Pamela Seley
West Coast Realty Division - Murrieta, CA
Residential Real Estate Agent serving SW RivCo CA

I agree with Nancy comment #7. It seems no one parties in real life anymore. So sad. I think too much time is spent on social media, myself included. Thanks for your post today,

Jul 05, 2012 08:11 AM #8
Tammie White, Broker
Franklin Homes Realty LLC - Franklin, TN
Franklin TN Homes for Sale

I'm not very good at social media. I would rather pick up the phone and talk to them about something I see on Facebook, rather than comment there. I still like the old-fashioned way of communicating; face-to-face.

Jul 05, 2012 08:13 AM #9
Margaret Goss
Baird & Warner Real Estate - Winnetka, IL
Chicago's North Shore & Winnetka Real Estate

Many of the social networking events I attend are specifically for, well, networking.  I suppose it's expected that business cards will come out and people will talk about what they do. 

However, if you are talking about other social events that are not specifically for networking, like parties, then one must tread carefully.  People know I sell real estate so usually the subject comes up without me having to bring it up. 

Jul 05, 2012 08:28 AM #10
Donald Reich
Prudential Centennial - New Rochelle, NY

Great post!

But even if you don't play it right, at least you are at the dance, and not sitting home alone!

Jul 05, 2012 08:33 AM #11
Susan Neal
RE/MAX Gold, Fair Oaks - Fair Oaks, CA
Fair Oaks CA & Sacramento Area Real Estate Broker

Hi Wayne and Jean Marie - This is a great analogy because it illustrates what I advise new bloggers who think they should blog only listings and market reports.  Don't be the person at the cocktail party who spends the whole party trying to drum up business.  You'll only end up making others stay away from you.  Mix in at least some fun stuff.

Jul 05, 2012 08:49 AM #12
Wayne and Jean Marie Zuhl
Samsel & Associates - Clark, NJ
The Last Names You'll Ever Need in Real Estate

LOL @ Roger :)

Richard, Beth, and Donald - I may forget lots of things, but I never forget to dance!

Nancy and Pamela - I love a great cocktail party! I love the clothes, the appetizers, the whole thing. And the next time I host one, I'm inviting the entire AR family :)

I agree, Tammie, but the 20-30 year olds buying houses now were born with a computer mouse in their hand. They're more comfortable texting than talking. We figured we've got to keep up with the clients.

I guess, Margaret, that we initially wrote this thinking of Facebook. It's so not cool to have nothing but business conversations.Even at our BNI networking, we're more focused on relationship building than grabbing referrals.

Jul 05, 2012 08:51 AM #13
Barbara Todaro
RE/MAX Executive Realty - Franklin, MA
Marketing Agent for The Todaro Team

Hi Wayne and Jean......  good post.... I think Roger wants you to have a cocktail party....

Jul 05, 2012 09:03 AM #14
Tanja Cisliek
Future Home Realty - Seminole, FL

I am still torn about Facebook as business tool - I agree, I have myself hidden people who's status updates were always about pitching their business. I am who I am, it does seem ok to have a life and be a friend, sister, mother, wife, and all those other roles that I am on Facebook. Being a Realtor is a big part of me, but there are actually several even bigger ones :)! So, I'll use facebook as a social networking page that it is, I am doing my fair share of "small talk" on there ... :)!

Jul 05, 2012 09:30 AM #15
Wayne and Jean Marie Zuhl
Samsel & Associates - Clark, NJ
The Last Names You'll Ever Need in Real Estate

Hi Barbara - We'll host if you'll show up :)

Tanja - I think you've got the right mix. Make your relationships and the business will follow.

Jul 05, 2012 09:33 AM #16
Myrl Jeffcoat
GreatWest Realty - Sacramento, CA
Greater Sacramento Real Estate Agent

Excellent advice, especially the part about not forgetting to dance:-)  I have been to social events and parties, where there have been those far too intent on self-promotion.  It usually comes off as pretty transparent.  It's one thing to rub elbows with people in the social networking scene.  It's another to rub noses with your elbow!

Jul 05, 2012 10:14 AM #17
Wayne and Jean Marie Zuhl
Samsel & Associates - Clark, NJ
The Last Names You'll Ever Need in Real Estate

I think you're right, Myrl. Not only is it transparant, it's a turnoff. No one wants to do business with someone who's that desperate to do business. 

Jul 05, 2012 10:26 AM #18
Digital Digital
Alachua, FL
full service

Hi Wayne and Jean,

That's a lovely way to approach engaging people, not to try to sell to them.

A cocktail party sounds better than a sales presentation.

Have a fabulous weekend!

Jul 05, 2012 01:06 PM #19
Hella Mitschke Rothwell
(831) 626-4000 - Honolulu, HI
Hawaii & California Real Estate Broker

Wayne and Jean: We have forgotten how to party! I used to go to fantastic ones, it was fun and, yes, there was dancing. You made new contacts, but you didn't talk business. Then you called them the next day or so to invite them for lunch to get to know them better. Now everything needs to be instant. PS. I would not give out business cards where there was DANCING. Jeez Louise (am I dating myself here?)

Jul 05, 2012 02:02 PM #20
Doug Bullwinkel
Envoy Mortgage, NMLS 6666 - Roseville, CA
Mortgage Loan Originator NMLS #281609

People use social media to get to know you and not to read your Real Estate ads.  I agree that the first thing I turn off is an ad that I don't want to read.

Jul 05, 2012 04:52 PM #21
Amanda Christiansen
Christiansen Group Realty (260)704-0843 - Fort Wayne, IN
Christiansen Group Realty

When I first started using social media, I was very careful to always be professional and paint a good picture of myself.  After a while I realized that truly being myself was the best strategy if I wanted to attract the people that I want to work with.  No tuxedos for me, I'll be in shorts and a t shirt!  Good post.

Jul 05, 2012 09:57 PM #22
Wayne and Jean Marie Zuhl
Samsel & Associates - Clark, NJ
The Last Names You'll Ever Need in Real Estate

Good morning Wanda and Doug - I couldn't agree more.

Me, too, Hella!

Hi there, Christiansens - being yourself is key to forming good relationships, don't you think?

Jul 05, 2012 10:35 PM #23
Richie Alan Naggar
people first...then business Ran Right Realty - Riverside, CA
agent & author

Leave the gun, take the cannoli? I am not very good at small talk, I don't party well but I do a mean Real Estate deal

Jul 06, 2012 12:21 AM #24
Sandy Acevedo
951-290-8588 - Chino Hills, CA
RE/MAX Masters, Inland Empire Homes for Sale

Great post and great tips.  I think Roger wants a cocktail party too. And if he goes, we all have to be invited.

Jul 06, 2012 01:32 AM #25
Mary Bowen
Coldwell Banker United, Realtor - The Woodlands, TX
Real Estate At Its Finest!!!

Good Advice. I really don't like seeing someone's status being all about business.

Jul 06, 2012 02:01 AM #26
Christine Donovan
Donovan Blatt Realty - Costa Mesa, CA
Broker/Attorney 714-319-9751 DRE01267479 - Costa M

Wayne and Jean - I'm not sure there can be enough reminders on this subject.  It's so easy to go the wrong direction.

Jul 06, 2012 04:24 PM #27
Post a Comment
Spam prevention
Show All Comments

What's the reason you're reporting this blog entry?

Are you sure you want to report this blog entry as spam?


Wayne and Jean Marie Zuhl

The Last Names You'll Ever Need in Real Estate
Want more information about Union County real estate?
Spam prevention

Additional Information