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You're so vain....you probably think this post is about you.

By
Real Estate Agent with Better Homes and Gardens Big Hill 2002018135

You’re so vain…you probably think this post is about you.

 

Some of you may remember the old Carly Simon song “You’re So Vain”.  For years, many famous men wondered if this song was perhaps about them.  I’ve noticed this trend again recently.  Not in songs however, but rather Facebook posts.

 

The young, the old and everyone in between seem to be guilty of this.  Even I have succumbed to the fear when reading a Facebook post…”Is this about me???”  Does the simple nature of Facebook encourage narcissism?  Google the two and see for yourself.  Where else in the world is it acceptable to “friend” as many people as possible without even really knowing them on a personal level?  Where else is it acceptable to have 200 pictures of yourself (duck lips and all if you happen to be under 18) and not feel a bit of shame in that?

 

Personally, I have pretty much enjoyed Facebook over the years.  And love reading posts about a family reunion, parties, your kid’s first day of school, the new pet, seeing somebody’s great vacation pictures, a church event or great cause being promoted.  Even political stances.  Even just how someone spent their day.  And yes, opinions.  We all have them people.  I don’t agree with them all.  I don’t like them all.  But I accept that folks have opinions.  And I would never limit my “friends” list to JUST republicans or JUST heterosexuals or JUST Christians, just because that is what I am.

 

So I post my opinions.  And I read yours. It’s a free world.  And I don’t want to stop giving mine.  Because that limits ME.  So this is where I continually debate on if I even keep the Facebook account.  Because why oh why must you take those opinions personally?  Can I not gripe about MY day without someone out there thinking “that must be about me?”  Can I not say I am sad or confused or happy or stuck in traffic without it somehow becoming all about you?

 

Don’t get me wrong, PLEASE!  I like your comments, I love your support.  And I try to be reciprocal with those as well.  But gee whiz…this seems to be epidemic.

 

I hate cheeseburgers – “I just took her out for burgers this past week.  She must hate ME!”

 

Bad day at work – “I work with her.  Did I say something to make her mad?”

 

My dog just barfed on our new carpet – “She asked me where to get a new pet and I told her.  I guess this is my fault now isn’t it?”

 

My toilet is broken – “My husband is a plumber…why didn’t she call us????”

 

I know it is just the nature of the beast to assume the worst.  At least in me unless I fight it really, really hard!  And I am JUST as guilty of this as anyone.  But I am to the point of being scared to post even about my weather-related headaches, lest someone that has wished for rain blame themselves.  Seriously though…I am going to work on this.  And I hope others will too.  And just as a side note…

 

If you plan on messaging me to see if this post was about you, then yes, it was.  LOL.

Posted by

 

Thanks for reading!

Kelley Weimerpink flower

 a house "SOLD" name!

Kelley Weimer is a full-time Real Estate professional serving the residential and light commercial needs of Southwest Ohio, including Preble County, Montgomery County, Butler and Darke Counties.  She serves the needs of today's home buyers and home sellers, working for one of the area's top real estate brokerages, Preble Plus Realty, LLC. Making real estate dreams come true since 2002, Kelley prides herself on honest, friendly service; staying on the edge of technology yet always keeping the focus on good ole' communication.  For your real estate dreams, please contact Kelley today!

Comments(40)

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Alisa McKeel Willson
Appraisal Pros in Texas - Huntsville, TX
Certified Res. Appraiser

Food for thought...thanks and thanks for reminding me about Carly's song...now it's playing in my head! 

I had a friend once who was so insecure she thought the guys in the football huddle were talking about her....well, not really but almost that bad.  I imagine Facebook does give some people a little to worry about.

 

Sep 08, 2012 11:13 PM
Dee Toohey
Innovative Realty Solutions Group - Longwood, FL
Broker, ABR, AHWD, CIPS, FMS, ePro

Too funny.  Love the song and am still humming it!

There are good and bad points to FB.  I'm sick of all the sayings as photos, I don't care about how much coffee you had or didn't have but the sharing of real photos, updates and events is good. 

Now Twitter......

Oct 15, 2012 12:04 PM
Suzanne Strickler
Realty Mark Associates - Havertown, PA
School is never out for the Successful.

Kelley ~ The first sentence of Rick Warren's Book The Purpose Driven Life is "It's not about you." Talk about an eye opening statement. We all have to fight really, really hard to grow out of that attitude.

 

Oct 25, 2012 06:08 AM
Catherine C Capasso
Catherine Cornelia Real Estate - Eastchester, NY
Cottage or Castle, What's Your Dream!

Your post is thought provoking in so many ways. There is a paranoia in all of us these days and we should stop taking ourselves so seriously.

I am having a love/hate relationship with Facebook. I joined years ago to know what my nieces were doing. They jokingly have said I "stalk" them on Facebook just because I "like" a post or add a comment... but seriously, all interaction with others has a place. It's when we attach more meaning to one thing; i.e., Facebook over another; i.e., picking up the phone and having a conversation that the problems and the paranoia set in. 

Let's stop trying to "read between the lines" because "Good Morning" may mean just that.

Thanks. 

Nov 15, 2012 10:07 AM
Jill Sackler
Charles Rutenberg Realty Inc. 516-575-7500 - Long Beach, NY
LI South Shore Real Estate - Broker Associate

I guess it speaks to the insecurities of a person. We all experience that sometimes.

Jan 09, 2013 02:31 AM
Christine Zinser
Metro Referral Associates Inc. - Burke, VA
I Make Home Happen™

Great post Kelley, but I'm confused!? You're not the thin-skinned reader of someone elses posts, right? And tell me your "friends" on fb aren't actually asking "was this about me"?  I honestly can say that I have never seen a post that made me think that about the post-er. Don't forget, there's always that little button that says "unfriend" and really, unless someone is keeping track of how many "friends" they have on fb, no one will be the wiser for you having pushed it.

Jan 28, 2013 04:33 AM
Deanna Casalino
Realty World J. Pavich R.E. - Estero, FL
Fort Myers Florida Homes,

LOL -- Good stuff and great comments. Liked them all. Thanks for sharing

Mar 03, 2013 09:42 PM
Lise Howe
Keller Williams Capital Properties - Washington, DC
Assoc. Broker in DC, MD, VA and attorney in DC

Thanks for a good reason to smile this morning - I have a hard time with facebook- can't believe that anyone wants to know what I had for dinner last night - and yet.... 

Apr 28, 2013 10:26 PM
Brad MacKenzie
Brad MacKenzie - Duxbury, MA
Turning Houses into Homes on the South Shore

You're so right.  Those are some of the problems people bring to FB.  I find the interface lacks depth in every way.  Lowest common denominator, you get what you pay for, and it is what it is, so get used to it if you want to use the medium.  But it's a peeve of mine that I can't post, say, a poem or a lyric that I find beautiful or poignant without explaining it.  Just post it and people will say, "Aww, are you okay?" or "Is this about me?".  So instead, you have to say, "WOW, this is OMG, soooo coool. I <3 it, don't you?"

May 25, 2013 05:06 AM
Beth and Richard Witt
New York, NY
The best Retired Brokers !!!!

Hi Kelly... nice to meet you... love your post... agree with just about everything you had to say and enjoy meeting another republican... Hope the IRS doesn't come after us for admitting that on line....  Yikes...   LOL

Happy Day

Beth

Jun 22, 2013 01:12 AM
Tracy Lee Parker
RE/MAX DFW Associates - Royse City, TX
Buy*Sell*Rent

Hi Kelley, My husband always says "It ain't all about you babe!" Funny post, but can't help but wonder can we???

Jul 18, 2013 06:20 AM
Holly Weatherwax
Associate Broker, Momentum Realty - Reston, VA
A Great Real Estate Experience

If you think Facebook is bad, spend some time on Twitter. The messages are more cryptic and people definitely assume the worst. I have teenager/twenty-something children and I am always hearing about comments someone made on Twitter that they KNOW are about them.

I have just gotten so I ignore things on FB that  I don't feel like reading and if someone gets offensive (my personal threshold), I hide their post so I don't have to see it. Sometimes I limit them only to important posts. If they are really bad, I will block them entirely (this happens when you have too many people from your high school that you didn't REALLY know--or you did and don't any longer). And if you think that might be you...well, then, think about what you post!

Jul 18, 2013 09:09 AM
Christine Gerbehy
Berkshire Hathaway Home Services Fox and Roach Northfield - Egg Harbor Township, NJ
Making waves, one home at a time...

Omg, lol!  SO TRUE!!!  You'd think we have complexes or something.  Sometimes I'm afraid to friend "certain people" that are a bit vocal with their vents and rants.  Goes with the territory I guess...

Aug 27, 2013 01:44 PM
Inna Ivchenko
Barcode Properties - Encino, CA
Realtor® • GRI • HAFA • PSC • Short Sale • Probate

I never had such experience.

FB can bring very nice people into your circle, and a lot of not good... I have the simple solution: 'delete' and keep my personal profile closed~much better that way.

 

 

Sep 13, 2013 05:24 PM
Terri Woods
Keller Williams Realty Mid-Willamette - Harrisburg, OR
Selling Homes and Land in Oregon

This is so true. I know it is hip to be a Facebooker, but I really don't like it at all. I don't like the stress from reading about everyone's bad days. I do think it allows people to focus on themselves instead of others. However, we have to be where the crowds are.  Thankfully, the grandparents have Facebook and keep up with the grandkids that way. In some aspects, we are really getting to be a "me" society. Thanks for the post.  FYI - I am not talking about anyone specifically.  I am new to AR.  :)

Oct 09, 2013 03:00 PM
Jason Crouch
Austin Texas Homes, LLC - Austin, TX
Broker - Austin Texas Real Estate (512-796-7653)

I wrote a post with the exact same title about 7 years ago here on AR. I think mine was about how people treated one another online vs. in person. 

Feb 01, 2014 02:05 AM
Jill Sackler
Charles Rutenberg Realty Inc. 516-575-7500 - Long Beach, NY
LI South Shore Real Estate - Broker Associate

Try not to get into peoples' heads is probably the best advice I ever got, but it's hard. Social media does encourage it.

Mar 13, 2014 11:40 PM
Bryan Beckstead, KOmKards, Care-Connect-Communicate, on auto pilot, 24/7.
Start MAXIMIZING the Internet.... Kommunicon.com - Priceville, ON
Become a KOmKard owner today,

Social Networking is a two edge sword, if you want to put yourself out " there " then you have to man up when the waters get a bit choppy.

 If people want to have what they perceive as the value of being active on Social networking sites, then they have to deal with whatever comes at them.

I talk to thousands of business owners in a year, what I am hearing, more and more in regards to Social Networking is;

"  Where's the beef ?"

 

Have a great Sunday

Bryan

 

Apr 13, 2014 02:08 AM
Bill Lauler
Chase Realty LLC - McLean, VA
Associate Broker,CIPS,CRB,SRES,GRI

Good Morning Kelley, We have been in the real estate business for 29+ years.As too the postings on FB we tend to be conservitive and only post our listings and the good news in our community, because if you post other items they are there forever.

                                        You could be know as "Good News" Kelley!

Jun 30, 2014 09:54 PM
Tammy Adams ~ Realtor / Podcaster
Maricopa Real Estate Co - Maricopa, AZ
A Maricopa Agent who Works, Lives & Loves Maricopa

This is too funny. I have watched people think a common easy sentence is about them. My own family will post something and one person thinks it is about them and the other is heck no I was talking about someone else. LOL. Facebook is hilarious to watch people with what they will post and interpret

Aug 05, 2014 03:29 PM