Life is Good; Change is Hard

Real Estate Agent with DFW FINE PROPERTIES 0506509


I was reminded of this phenomenon this past weekend at Fifth House Lodge in Bridgton, Maine. In the gardens, a butterfly lands and my eyes see something different and how it relates to my business as a REALTOR® and the changes people go through when transitioning from rent to buy.

Where I notice people have a tendency to get stuck is during the Option Period. This is where the transition begins. The person, who relies on reason and logic, has to move forward and trust the journey they are on for change. The defining moment begins to take place after the Home Inspection, when the individual begins to feel some discomfort. The buyer, and/or tenant, recognizes that home maintenance is part of the package deal. As the inspector points out defects, flaws, and concerns, the buyer has to be ready to accept future responsibility and that’s where some people have second thoughts. Is it easier to rent than own? Do I want to maintain a home, or do I want to continue paying rent and let someone else assume responsibility for home maintenance? 

My eyes shift back to the butterfly and the catalyst for change becomes more clearly in focus. Before the awakening, the emergence of the beautiful butterfly, this species was merely a caterpillar, safely snuggled in the comfort a cocoon. It didn’t know what it was like on the outside until it went through the process of change. By the same token, a renter doesn’t know what to expect until they shift through the process of what it takes to buy a home. For a person who relies on reason and logic, they have to feel something different – a shift is beginning to occur. The catalyst for change takes courage.

“What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls a butterfly.” --- Richard Bach



During the process of buying a home, a buyer decides more than just what items they want repaired, or what responsibility they are willing to assume – they decide whether or not they call an end to the landlord/tenant relationship or do they want to be the master of their dwelling. 

I watched as the butterfly moved freely from flower to flower and stopped to take the nectar and that's when it hit me, every time I had to make a change in my own personal life, I was afraid of whether or not I could land successfully.  Transitioning into the unknown requires risk. Taking that leap of faith takes courage and just like the caterpillar who moves out of the cocoon and transitions into a butterfly, people need to trust their instict and the ones who are on their journey.

A REALTOR® plays a crucial role, so does the Home Inspector and the Lender. But it's the buyer who makes the ultimate decision. For a buyer to decide to relinquish the place where they are living for something different means they have to be willing to let go of the familiar, losing their comfortable routine, in exchange for something more appealing. In essence, giving up control and be willing to accept change takes a lot of courage. 

My eyes shift back to the butterfly in my photograph and I am gently reminded of the catalyst for change. I'm no longer in Maine, today I'm in the Chicago area, near the place where I once lived, reflecting, reminscing, thinking about how freely that butterfly transitioned from a caterpillar to a higher species called the butterfly. I am reminded once again that Maine was the catalyst for my change from Chicago to Texas. Here is where I transitioned. It took risk and courage. If you are in transition and need to talk about moving, call me, and I'll be there...




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                                        2900 W Southlake Blvd, Suite 180
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                                         Patricia Feager
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"With self-discipline most anything is possible." --- Theodore Roosevelt 





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Myrl Jeffcoat
GreatWest Realty - Sacramento, CA
Greater Sacramento Real Estate Agent

First off, Patricia, let me say I admire the picture with the butterfly.  And yes, change can sometimes be really difficult, or overwhelming.  A few years ago, I was shuffling along selling real estate, while also working at a software development company.  I sold a lot of homes to the employees there.  The company went through several acquisitions in the 8 1/2 years I worked there.  I had developed a a financial plan based on the path I was on.  However, about 3 years before I thought I might leave the company and focus only on real estate, there was a big layoff at the company.  My Plan A went totally out the window.  However, the golden parachute I had been given, and a couple of other financial maneuvers made my new Plan B even more beneficial.  It still took a emotional adjustment to get comfortable and relax with with the new change. 

Change in this instance was good, but I don't agree with those that patently declare, "Change is good!"  Change is nothing but raw energy.  It is only as good as those who have the power to implement and spin it.  The best we can do is adapt as easily as we can, so we become comfortable with the environment.  What John Lennon said is so true, "Life is what happens when you are busy making other plans!"

Aug 23, 2012 09:25 AM #26
Ellen Caruso
Daniel Gale Sotheby's International Realty - Glen Head, NY

Patricia, your careful thought and flowing words and images brought me to what I'm dealing with right now. I have been working with buyers for over a year, always something breaks the deal. I talked to the wife and said perhaps his excuses, or always finding something negative is because he is afraid to change. We have an offer of 3.4MM in now on the most perfect house, I advised them 3.6 will get the house of their dreams.....they will go to 3.5 but I fear its not enough....they need to commit to change!

Please pray with me for this deal to go through. It is NOT about a commission, I want the wife and family to get the home they deserve!

Aug 23, 2012 11:15 AM #27
Hella Mitschke Rothwell
(831) 626-4000 - Honolulu, HI
Hawaii & California Real Estate Broker

Change can be very difficult for some people, while others thrive on it. Buying a home that has a lot of problems can become overwhelming for someone who is used to renting and having everything fixed for them. On the other hand, home ownership is so rewarding because you can express yourself in it.

Aug 23, 2012 02:24 PM #28
What Not To Renovate - Milan B.
Palm Coast, FL
We provide tips & trends on home renos & designs

Change is always difficult but necessary to grow to the next level.

Sometimes we just have to let go and keep our eyes on the prize.

Have a fabulous weekend!


Aug 23, 2012 04:39 PM #29
Gary Frimann
Eagle Ridge Realty / Signature Homes & Estates - Gilroy, CA
REALTOR and Broker

It was nice for a change to read something inspirational first thing this morning.

Aug 23, 2012 06:37 PM #30
James Dray
Fathom Realty AR LLC - Bentonville, AR
Exceptional Agents, Outstanding Results

Morning Patricia first of all congrats on the feature. Second I do like the way you take a simple thing like a butterfly and transform it into the animal we in the end all are and the changes we go through

Aug 23, 2012 08:23 PM #31
Karen Kruschka
RE/MAX Executives - Woodbridge, VA
- "My Experience Isn't Expensive - It's PRICELESS"

Patricia  I will be the first to admit I don;t embrace change for the sake of it.  I need to be convinced it has value and meaning to me and those I interact with

Aug 23, 2012 08:41 PM #32
Andrew Mooers | 207.532.6573
Northern Maine Real Estate-Aroostook County Broker

The guy or gal wearing, sporting the blue and gold "R" is suppose to make sure no one else in the real estate list, market, sell process has butterflies fluttering in their stomachs. Great image!

Aug 23, 2012 10:39 PM #33
David Burrows
Classic Realty - Fairfax, VA
No Pressure, Just Seriously Devoted to Real Estate

I am always so fascinated with Butterflies... The metamorphosis that takes place is unbelievable... Thanks Patricia for a most interesting post today.

Aug 24, 2012 02:14 AM #34
Lawrence "Larry" & Sheila Agranoff. Cell: 631-805-4400
The Top Team @ Charles Rutenberg Realty 255 Executive Dr, Plainview NY 11803 - Plainview, NY
Long Island Condo & Home Sale Specialists

Change can be difficult Patricia and no one experiences it the same way or feels the same about it. You have been a role model for all those that read your blog posts and the words that you put to your beautiful photos!

Aug 24, 2012 02:53 AM #35
Phil Leng
Retired - Kirkland, WA
Phil Leng - Retired

Hi Butterfly Patricia,

Quite the analogy of change and the butterfly.

Fun to read, and follow your way of looking at it


Aug 24, 2012 09:55 AM #36
Rob Thomas
Prestige Homes of The Tri Cities, Inc. CALL....423-341-6954 - Bristol, TN
Bristol TN-VA & Tri Cities Agent, ABR, GRI, e-Pro

Patricia ....Change is hard sometimes and at other times very good! Great post and Feature!

Have a great night in TX!

Aug 24, 2012 10:36 AM #37
Adrian Willanger
206 909-7536 - Seattle, WA
Profit from my two decades of experience

Patricia, pretty powerful stuff! This is serves as a good reminder for me when I go out to show a home this morning what my clients are experiencing. 

Aug 25, 2012 12:05 AM #38
Kathy Streib
Room Service Home Staging - Delray Beach, FL
Home Stager - Palm Beach County,FL -561-914-6224

Patricia- as I said many times, you should focus on your writing, because as you can tell, we all love it.  It is a wonderful trait that you have... to be able to see much more in the world around you than others might. 

Aug 25, 2012 05:47 AM #39
Debb Janes EcoBroker and Bernie Stea JD
ViewHomes of Clark County - Nature As Neighbors - Camas, WA
REALTORS® in Clark County, WA

Just lovely Patricia. Really. I agree with Joni 100%. You are a gift and I am so happy that writing allows you to express your thoughts and ideas so beautifully. This is stunning on many levels. Well deserved star - so happy to see it attached to this particular post.

Aug 27, 2012 02:44 AM #40
Clint Mckie
Desert Sun Home, commercial Inspections - Carlsbad, NM
Desert Sun Home, Comm. Inspection 1-575-706-5586

Hi Patricia,

Congrat's on the Featured post.

I would like to see everyone own a home. But there are those who don't want the responsibilities of owning a home. For them, that's O.K. but for the rest of the worlds population everyone who can should buy a home and maintain it as best as possible.

Fine shot of the Monarch Butterfly.

Have a safe trip back to Flower Mound, Texas.

Best, Clint McKie  

Aug 27, 2012 09:05 PM #41
Will Nesbitt
Nesbitt Realty at Condo Alexandria - Alexandria, VA
Nesbitt Realty is a family-run brokerage.

Chang is glacial. Thanks for imparting your words of wisdom to the AR community! Have a nice week!

Aug 28, 2012 05:33 AM #42
Bob Crane
Woodland Management Service / Woodland Real Estate, Keller Williams fox cities - Stevens Point, WI
Forestland Experts! 715-204-9671

Wow, what a great analogy, and that quote is priceless.  Thanks for sharing these words of wisdom with us Patricia.

Aug 29, 2012 07:35 AM #43
Rebecca Gaujot, Realtor®
Perry Wellington Realty, Adam Conrad, Broker - Lewisburg, WV
Lewisburg WV, the go to agent for all real estate

Patricia another great post.  We must embrace change... and once we do, we wonder what took us so long to make the change :)

Aug 30, 2012 02:46 AM #44
Roy Kelley
Realty Group Referrals - Gaithersburg, MD
Roy and Dolores Kelley Photographs

Have a great day and a very special holiday weekend.  Be sure to have your camera in hand to capture the special moments.

Aug 30, 2012 08:36 PM #45
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