My wife and I have spent the last five years attending self-development courses, coaching, read all the success manuals and struggled through a lot of trial an error. We wanted to share what we discovered.
We had a lot of information that all made logical sense. If I do "A", then it will produce result "B". Simple enough right?? Except - the forgot to tell us how long it will take!! We started to ponder as to why some people seemed to be achieving success faster and percievably easier...We didn't get it!! Were we just DESTINED to live a life of mediocrity?? Good News!! Destiny is a result of our actions today... we discovered that even the smallest decision could send us far off our goals and dreams over a long period of time. The more our decisions were in alignment with our goals - the easier it became and the faster we got results. We both had what we thought were different goals -so we were pulling in different directions....Nikki believed that I needed her to work more and spend less time with the kids, and I wanted to work more NOW so we can get to a point where we can have more time with the kids. You see we both had the same end goal but just different timeframes. Once we understood we wanted the same thing - we stopped making contradicting decisions that pull us side to side instead of moving forward. We know actually work less hours now, and have tripled our production.
What was the Key to Success? It is simple - Understanding WHY you do what you do. You have to have a reason for going after what you want. More importantly - the Reason for - has to be bigger than you!! We have all heard this, but what does this mean!! This means that as you go for what you want - you will encounter obstacles. While some are physical, the hardest to get through are the mental ones:
"What happens if I make a mistake?"
"What if people reject me"
"What if I fail"
"What will people think"
"I do not like talking to people"
"I don't have the money"
I can go on and on about the self sabotage talks that happen within ourselves. So the reason to get past these things has to be SO IMPORTANT that you have no choice but to get past it!! That is the Key!! When you have your intention is PURE - nothing can stop you!!! Your pasision will drive you. You will constantly encounter these obstacles - but you will find a way through because the DESIRE if larger than the obstacle(fear). Your actions will be consistent with what you want, and a good measure of that will be your results.
In the classes we took, we were always reminded: "I can tell what you want in your life based on your results. Somtimes harsh, but always fair" - Our lives are a result of the choices we make...so what are you choosing that is keeping you from what you want??
For me, it WAS the need to be right, or a fear of being wrong!!. It was more important to have things my way than to have a family - my results were: A failed first marriage and not getting to see my sons grow up. Results speak for themselves. As I got clear on what was most important to me(family), the needs to be right was miniscule compared to the need to create a loving environment and being a family.
Let me know if you have questions or would like some help discovering what holds you - it may not be pretty, but at least you can have a starting point to go from.