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Staff Conflict? Refer to Your Driver's Ed Training.

By
Real Estate Broker/Owner with Cornerstone Business Group Inc 0225086119

Office relationships can make or break a company.  When an office staff is dynamic and congruent, the sky is the limit.  The atmosphere generates an environment of camaraderie, teamwork and success.  When it's the opposite, it can make an office a toxic place to work, and it can ultimately bring the office down.  What can you do when office relationships turn negative?  How do you handle office staff conflict?

 

I think one key to dealing with office conflict is to remember your high school Driver's Ed principles.  What do I mean?

  • When you wade into an employee conflict situation, you need to buckle up.  In a car, the seat belt is there to protect you in the event of a crash.  Office conflict can be rough terrain, but it can be navigated to a smooth conclusion.
  • Check all of your mirrors to see what's behind you.  A conflict rarely erupts on the spur of the moment.  More often, there has been precipitating events that have generated an explosive environment.  If they are dealt with early, they may avoid a wreck.  
  • Look both ways, and then look again.  A conflict is seldom one-sided.  An individual will not get into a conflict with himself.  Every conflict has at least two people.  Each one has a story.  There is truth somewhere in the midst of all of the information.  It is never wise to make a conclusion until all the facts are heard.  Once you have all of the information, you can make a decision from that knowledge, and not from emotion.  
  • Be patient and proceed with caution.  When emotions are ignited in conflict, it takes a while for those involved to settle down long enough to listen to reason and wisdom.  Be patient.
  • Yield the right of away and follow all signs.  Always pick the right way.  Siding with one angry co-worker over another is a dangerous road to travel.  Let the story unfold and make a decision based upon the facts. 
  • Begin braking before you get to the stop.  Make sure you slow the intensity down before you call for a stop.  An offended co-worker may need a little more time to cool off before the offending co-worker.  You want to resolve the problem, but do it so that every one comes out feeling like they have had their issues addressed.
  • In a worst case scenario, stop the ride.  You may have to let a divisive colleague go.  The health of any office is greater than an individual (even though you want to make every worker an integral part of your team).

 

Office relationships can be one of the most enjoyable parts of your working career.  When workers gel, it can be fantastic.  When they don't, it can be a nightmare.  Keeping office relationships healthy can mean a great exerpience for clients and workers.  When relationships get in trouble, refer to Driver's Ed. 

Comments (25)

Lenn Harley
Lenn Harley, Homefinders.com, MD & VA Homes and Real Estate - Leesburg, VA
Real Estate Broker - Virginia & Maryland

One of the reasons I like working alone as a sole proprietor broker is because I no longer have to tolerate inner office squabbles, back stabbing, lead stealing, cliques, prima donna and primo uomo and other infantile behavior.

Some licensees are insufficiently mature to operate a real estate business.  I cringe to think of their practices with buyers and sellers.  Of course, that may account for the low popularity of agents with the general public.

Apr 15, 2013 08:08 PM
James Dray
Fathom Realty - Bentonville, AR

I know I'm right and everyone else is so wrong that is until the boss tells me different.  So many views on the same subject and everyone knows their way is the right way.  Good luck on the issuee but as you say when in doubt go back to the basics and the manual. 

Apr 15, 2013 08:39 PM
Mike Cooper, Broker VA,WV
Cornerstone Business Group Inc - Winchester, VA
Your Neighborhood Real Estate Sales Pro

Lloyd, I'm an independent broker with a very small staff, and I love it.  Conflict is not an issue, but I've seen enough to remember the impact it has on a company.  Yeow!

Thanks, Praful.

Thank you, Conrad. 

Lenn, ironically, I do the same as you.  People are always asking when I'm going to bring on agents, and I really don't know.  I may never.  it's just too easy working alone. 

There you go, James. 

Apr 15, 2013 09:22 PM
Nina Hollander, Broker
Coldwell Banker Realty - Charlotte, NC
Your Greater Charlotte Realtor

Very creative, Mike. Your points are spot on but I'd never have thought of comparing them to driving!

Apr 15, 2013 09:59 PM
Sheila Anderson
Referral Group Incorporated - East Brunswick, NJ
The Real Estate Whisperer Who Listens 732-715-1133

Good morning Mike. You are very wise and I respecr you. In my experience buckling up is important and so is considering the history of an agent. Troubled people always seem to have issues.

Apr 15, 2013 10:39 PM
Sally K. & David L. Hanson
EXP Realty 414-525-0563 - Brookfield, WI
WI Real Estate Agents - Luxury - Divorce

Too true...though deciding not to be with a broker because "Suzy" works for that company...eh....

Apr 15, 2013 10:50 PM
Michael Setunsky
Woodbridge, VA
Your Commercial Real Estate Link to Northern VA

Mike, your Driver's Ed analogy is a good one. Office conflicts can really bring down an office.

Apr 15, 2013 11:04 PM
Amanda S. Davidson
Amanda Davidson Real Estate Group Brokered By Real - Alexandria, VA
Alexandria Virginia Homes For Sale

Mike- this is a great analogy! It reminds me of the days I was with a big box broker. I cringed everytime I had to go by the office for something - always drama going on. Makes me happy to have my own show now...no drama!

Apr 15, 2013 11:52 PM
Charita Cadenhead
eXp Realty - Birmingham, AL
Serving Jefferson and Shelby Counties (Alabama)

Mike I haven't dealt with anything like this in so long, I hardly remember what it's like.  Counting my blessings.

Apr 15, 2013 11:55 PM
Mike Cooper, Broker VA,WV
Cornerstone Business Group Inc - Winchester, VA
Your Neighborhood Real Estate Sales Pro

Nina, I saw a commercial the other day about safe driving, and it sparked the idea.  Go figure.  8-)

Yes they do, Sheila.  They can be toxic to a company.

Absolutely, S & D.

They sure can, Michael.  I've been pretty fortunate in that this has never really been a huge deal.

Don't you just love the drama free zone.  I can only complain about me to me for so long.  It doesn't do any good anyway.  8-)

You are blessed, Charita. 

Apr 16, 2013 12:06 AM
Dr. Paula McDonald
Beam & Branch Realty - Granbury, TX
Granbury, TX 936-203-0279

Such a great post on this topic and good analogy.  The inner office politics are just things that I prefer not to have to deal with.  Life is too short.

Apr 16, 2013 12:11 AM
Richie Alan Naggar
people first...then business Ran Right Realty - Riverside, CA
agent & author

Honoring the theme of the post....Hit & run is probably tempting at the work place...Instead, pull over and exchange data....At work, we come together to put legs on a business plan and not to work out anti-social behaviors...Good post here

Apr 16, 2013 12:12 AM
Mike Cooper, Broker VA,WV
Cornerstone Business Group Inc - Winchester, VA
Your Neighborhood Real Estate Sales Pro

Me too, Paula.  That's why I work alone.  8-)

Thank you, Richie.

Apr 16, 2013 01:59 AM
Bryan Robertson
Los Altos, CA

I really try to take a diplomatic approach to organizational behavior. There are times when I need to follow the "Walk softly and carry a big stick" approach as well.

Apr 16, 2013 02:00 AM
Mike Cooper, Broker VA,WV
Cornerstone Business Group Inc - Winchester, VA
Your Neighborhood Real Estate Sales Pro

That's a good idea, Byran.  If nothing else, you can bang them on the head. 

Apr 16, 2013 02:02 AM
Trisha Bush-LeFore
Preferred Properties Land & Homes - Walla Walla, WA
Providing Realtor Services in the Walla Walla Area

Cute analogies. We are fortunate to have a wonderful environment in our office. Hopefully everyone else could enjoy the same.

Apr 16, 2013 06:50 AM
Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

Interesting metaphor for a good topic.  I think you're right, of course.  But when I took driver's ed I just wanted to see how fast I could get around the course!

Apr 16, 2013 08:58 AM
Cara Lam
Gladewater National Bank, NMLS#1009328 - Pinellas Park, FL
Cara Lam, Gladewater National Bank

I love your analogy... I just had to chuckle but realistically it is so true...I know that I will think of you if this ever happens to me !!!

Thanks for the post!!!

Apr 16, 2013 11:42 AM
Mike Cooper, Broker VA,WV
Cornerstone Business Group Inc - Winchester, VA
Your Neighborhood Real Estate Sales Pro

The same here, Trisha.  Oh wait, I work alone.  8=)

I think we're like minded on the old D Ed classes, Jay.

There you go, Cara.  An easy to remember analogy.  8=)

Apr 16, 2013 12:01 PM
Cassandra Boyes
Orchestrated Designs - Barrington, IL
HSR Certified Home Stager, Staging Barrington-Lake Geneva, www.orchestrateddesigns.com

So clever Mike!  Conflict management is such an interesting thing to me.  I previously worked as a Challenge Course Facilitator, which for those who are unfamiliar: groups come (usually to some kind of camp) to complete challenges given to them by a facilitator in order to address the different aspects of team-building, in hopes of bonding.  I've seen it all, and one of my favorite things about being able to be "front seat" to all of that conflict, was watching how it could all be turned around and the team made stronger in the end.  It's like they got into a wreck, but then the car was taken to the shop and built even better than it was before! 

Now I'm admittedly a glass half-full person, so I always hope for the best when it comes to conflict.  All of your points are great reminders!

Apr 16, 2013 11:18 PM