I didn't even get to set the radon device because, well, that's right, an AR Ambassador owes me big.
THE REALTOR knew I would call following my first inspection to meet her at this house to drop off a radon. That way we would meet at the same time. Calling THE REALTOR she didn't answer but I left a message. I was at the house for a while when THE REALTOR called, saying she was just leaving her house. Apparently she had just pried herself out of bed. And she was in a terrific mood!
Sitting in front of the house I noticed the brick facade and new windows. OK, not bad I thought.
Then I looked at the roof.
There were many broken shingles, and an old antenna laying sideways on the back side, and the gutter had a severe dip in the middle.
At the bottom of the dip was a broken seam, rusty and old, where water was pouring out when it rained.
The water was cascading in front of one of the new windows, splattering it with mud.
I love it when that happens.
THE REALTOR arrived. Yep, in a mood! When people I know are in a mood, you should know, I am a shark in the water.
We walked in and saw enough water on the basement floor to make a river otter happy!
The source of the water was not hard to find!
THE REALTOR was not happy.
Looking up I saw the panel box.
It was a very old Federal Pacific Stab-Lok with aluminum wiring!
Poorly labeled, I saw a new breaker and a screw missing.
Someone had been inside!
Not good.
THE REALTOR didn't understand, so I gave her a quick FedPac lesson.
Her mood did not improve.
I moved to the furnace.
It was "newer."
Uh, oh. The flexible gas line enters the side of the unit.
That's a biggie no no.
As the unit vibrates it can actually cut into that gas line!
That, and no sediment trap on the furnace or water heater.
THE REALTOR wasn't happy, but by now I was having fun! She knew it.
Beside the furnace the ONLY main drain stack in the house never had a clean-out port installed.
Wait, is it there? Oh, I guess not.
I was going from thing to thing faster than she could keep up! For some reason THE REALTOR was not enjoying this as much as I.
Looking up, what's that white gift wrapping around the furnace flue?
Oh well, at least it's pretty.
And all of the spider webs in the furnace room, and there were a LOT!, means that air is flowing through the basement with impunity!
Spiders only build webs near moving air.
I think there may have been a lot of moving air in that basement! Particularly in winter!
Looking around for spider evidence, because there have to be a lot of them, I found some.
Mingled with the usual house spider eggs were lots of cream-colored eggs, with little points.
Yep! Black Widow spiders!
THE REALTOR asked me why they are there. My answer, "Because there's lots of food!"
I was laughing out loud. Her mood deepened.
She asked if I was going to lay the radon. Knowing this would cost me nearly $500 I told her that no way were these people buying this house. But hey, a Scout is trustworthy.
They are a young couple, newly married (THE REALTOR said they still giggle with each other) and no money.
There were other things too - plastic dryer vent, serious staining on the ceiling under the kitchen, a basement window that didn't close properly. I could go on.
THE REALTOR did not. She was already in the mood to call her clients!
IN ONE OF THE MOST PROFESSIONAL THINGS I HAVE SEEN A REALTOR DO, THE REALTOR IMMEDIATELY CALLED HER CLIENTS!
She told them that "the home inspector" (nameless dontcha know) had already found so much stuff she didn't want them to buy the house. Um, "she?"
THE REALTOR asked me how much I would charge if they needed a report or letter to get out of the contract if the HOA docs didn't work. She already knew the answer to that, but felt compelled to ask. You know the answer too...
Walking out THE REALTOR turned and looked at the house and wistfully said, "But it has new windows..." I don't remember my answer exactly, but it was something like, while laughing, "That's lipstick Honeydoll!"
Wow, once again my honesty costs me big. THE REALTOR owes me big.
CHRIS ANN CLELAND OWES ME BIG!!
When I told her this post "just might" be coming, she asked if I was going to use her name. Well, would that be fair to THE REALTOR?
But, for pay back I'm thinking 500,000 AR points.
All in favor say Aye!
NOW, FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO DON'T ME WELL (OR CHRIS ANN) - THIS POST COVERS THINGS THAT REALLY WERE FOUND IN ONE HOUSE AND IN ONLY A FEW MINUTES. BUT MUCH OF THE POST IS A TEASE AND TONGUE IN CHEEK. YOU WOULD HAVE TO UNDERSTAND MY SENSE OF HUMOR AND SEE THE TWINKLE IN MY EYE AS I WRITE SOME OF MY POSTS. CHRIS ANN AND I HAVE WORKED TOGETHER FOR A LONG TIME AND WHILE YOU MIGHT NOT UNDERSTAND MY WACKY HUMOR, SHE DOES. SHE HANDLED THE SITUATION WITH THIS HOME AND HER CLIENTS ABOUT A PROFESSIONALLY AS A REALTOR COULD!
AND I'M SURE THE 500K IN POINTS IS ON THE WAY REALLY QUICKLY!
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