One of the First Tricks of Trade: Never Loose your Cool!

Real Estate Agent with Century 21 Sundance Realty

I watched something yesterday that prompted me to write about today. I rarely watch reality shows, not because I think I am above them, but because I rarely have time for them. Yesterday was one of those slow nights, as I was flipping through the channels, and came across "The Biggest Loser".

If some of you never watched it, it's about people competing to lose weight. The one who wins and loses the most weight is The Biggest Loser. So, one the contestants was having particularly hard week struggling to loose weight and getting frustrated, while her coach was trying to figure out what's the problem and how she could help her.


At the weight in, the coach got too emotional and started to yell at the host of the show because the host was asking the contestant some tough questions about the way she feels, what she is thinking, etc... Well, I know it is a reality show and sometimes it can be a bit theatrical, but when the coach lost her cool and started just yelling,"F..... this, and what kind of question is that, and why don't you back off that contestant, she is struggling, don't you see," it felt that the coach lost her marbles for a second. Everybody was stunned by her behavior including the other coach, the rest of the contestants, and the host.

Now, if you know me, I use that expression freely, since it is simply a word. However, I would never use it when I am angry or upset, directing it to a specific person because of something they did or asked me about. I would especially not use it when I am working with the public, when I am the professional. I guess that scene yesterday just reminded me to never loose my cool when dealing with people, even if they start screaming (and that doesn't include just the public, but also other associates, Realtors in town, maintenance people, etc). After all, it's you who ends up looking like a fool.


 Then, the coach said something that topped all of that. She said, "Of course that contestant is feeling down. She is a woman, her metabolism is slower than men's, there is no way she can win or compete against other men in the group." Now I hate judging people, but as a coach, you have to keep it cool because you are the professional. To admit on national television that one of your teammates is worse than others is at the very least not nice if not rude.

It's like my broker coming to the office and telling me in front of all other associates that I am not as good/productive and never could catch up. It's like my real estate trainer coming up to me and saying you are never going to achieve what the rest of the Realtors are doing. I think the main objective of a coach, a trainer, or a broker is tell the person," YOU CAN!" even when it seems not feasible, since no one truly knows the full potential of another person. Doubting we can do on our own. No help needed there.

Now, perhaps I am exaggerating and went a little overboard with it, so if you watched the show last night and would like to share your opinion of what happened, please do. I'd like to hear others' perspective.


Anna Lukyanova
Century 21 Sundance Realty 1102 Pelican Bay Dr. Daytona Beach, FL 32119
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Comments (4)

JDo Doe
Barrington, RI
good post, Anna - too true on many instances I've had an agent freak out on me (I like many folks do not like to be freaked out upon) but I always remind them to take a breath - no one has died due to this situation and likely things will turn out just fine - IF WE KEEP OUR HEADS!
Mar 12, 2008 05:29 AM
Anna Lukyanova
Century 21 Sundance Realty - Daytona Beach, FL

Nathan, you are so right ;-). It's been proven that when you are angry, you temporarily become "less smart". They did a study on a human brain, and found out when we stress out, the brain doens't operate as well. And we all know in stressful situations, we need all of our brain to come up with effective solutions to a problem.

Mar 12, 2008 05:40 AM
Midori Miller
Talk 2 Midori, LLC - Daytona Beach, FL
Online Marketing For Real Estate Professionals I like this post alot.  Keeping your cool is so important in our business or any business for that matter.  To rattle off about someone at their expense is a terrible incentive.  Imagine if I did that...I would not be training.  I do love reality shows and have admitted it!  While you were watching the biggest loser last night...I was watching the pussy cat dolls the night before!
Mar 12, 2008 08:44 AM
Anna Lukyanova
Century 21 Sundance Realty - Daytona Beach, FL
Midori, I would love to see you lose your marbles ;-).  Since you've been with the company, I haven't witnessed it just yet.............And, God knows you've been bombarded with some heavy stuff.
Mar 12, 2008 09:30 AM