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HONEY DEAR and MADAME

By
Real Estate Broker/Owner with people first...then business Ran Right Realty 636943 licensed to thrill

Ladies and Gentleman your thoughts please. Many times the above words are used to address you and others and I want to know what your thoughts are when they do. How it is said is important too. Why it is said is appropriate as well as where it is said. I have seen these words used correctly and open doors and warm hearts

DEARIE...?

You can also take these words and add to them via enunciation and make them derogatory as well. The point is are these words when used correctly, in the moment acceptable to the receiver? How about to the giver or originator? Do they invoke or compliment?

CAN A STRANGER BE DEAR?

Furthermore, are these comments allowed in a business arena as well as in a personal environment? I know that there is no controversy in using them on people that you know. But how about people that you don't? Is it okay to cut corners and blurt out these affectionate sounding words?

THERE GOES A "DEAR" NOW

I have seen up close and personal women of all ages who just command these remarks to come to them. My wife definitely attracts the word dear as she resonates a sincere, guile-less and honest demeanor in all that she does. Not only do I find myself using "dear" on her, but other women give it to her freely....which raises another point too

MEN or WOMEN?

If we find that these words when used correctly are acceptable, can either men or women employ them freely...? I have often spoken of certain women referencing them as dear, sweet and lovely to others who readily agree.

WHAT IF IT IS USED ON YOU?

Should or can these words be allowed into the mainstream of personal or professional interaction without controversy?

 

 

 

Roger D. Mucci
Shaken...with a Twist 216.633.2092 - Euclid, OH
Lets shake things up at your home today!

Guilty at times of calling women dear or sweetie.....comes from all those years of being a hairdresser.  Most of the time it's not found offensive.  Occasionally, I'm sure it is.....

Sep 18, 2013 11:39 PM
Richie Alan Naggar
people first...then business Ran Right Realty - Riverside, CA
agent & author

Roger...I see it as common speak in the hair dressing world...So withdraw your plea of guilty my friend...

Sep 18, 2013 11:41 PM
Jeff Stevens
Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices New Mexico Properties - Las Cruces, NM
Jeff Stevens, Associate Broker/REALTOR

Richie - at the risk of sounding ageist, I find those words kinda old fashioned. I'm not sure they would be acceptable to use in business in any context. 

Sep 18, 2013 11:41 PM
Mary Ann Woolerton
Long and Foster 703-368-1146 - Manassas, VA
Agent, Long and Foster RE Gainesville VA

One of the biggest differences is culture, I believe.  My hubby is from England and it is very common for him to use the term "luv".  This is a normal form of address in England.  I personally do  not take offense at whatever I'm addressed by.  (Especially if they want me to sell their house  :-D.)  I think we would all be better off if people were more tolerant and less quick to take offense.

Sep 18, 2013 11:47 PM
Richie Alan Naggar
people first...then business Ran Right Realty - Riverside, CA
agent & author

DRIZZLING

Hello Jeffrey...point taken. I interact with the age group where this is in play at times....thank you

Mary Ann...Most excellent commenting and point made with an example too...Tell that ole Guvnor that "luv" is worth it

Sep 18, 2013 11:57 PM
Amanda Christiansen
Christiansen Group Realty (260)704-0843 - Fort Wayne, IN
Christiansen Group Realty

Interesting question Richie.  I don't ever use these names when talking to women.  I think it might be taken as offensive.  

On the flip side, there is a lender in my office that calls me "Chief."  I was a little turned off at first, but everytime he does it now it is met with a "Hey Sport" or "What's up Champ?"  It's now like a game.  :)

Sep 19, 2013 12:05 AM
Patricia Kennedy
RLAH@properties - Washington, DC
Home in the Capital

Richie, I hate being refered to as "Ma'am".  Just makes me feel old.  And I think that while "Dear" certainly has a place, it's probably not in my car with clients, unless I really, really know them well. 

Sep 19, 2013 12:36 AM
Lawrence "Larry" & Sheila Agranoff. Cell: 631-805-4400
The Top Team @ Charles Rutenberg Realty 255 Executive Dr, Plainview NY 11803 - Plainview, NY
Long Island Condo and Home Specialists

Dear, honey, sweetie...keep to family. Ma'am...Never use!

Sep 19, 2013 01:22 AM
Richie Alan Naggar
people first...then business Ran Right Realty - Riverside, CA
agent & author

A & J...You raise a good point of which I considered when writing this...thank you. Hey Champ...E-Z- money, handsome, buddy and sport among other names can be thrown at a man too..What then?   Jared...good input

 

Patricia...The cutist flutist...Yes to your wholesome command and commenting...Always welcomed at Richie's General Store & Post

Sep 19, 2013 01:25 AM
Richie Alan Naggar
people first...then business Ran Right Realty - Riverside, CA
agent & author

Larry & Sheila...pipe in: Yes with certain places and people and NO to ma'am no matter what...Thank you L & S

Sep 19, 2013 01:28 AM
Phil Stevenson, CRMP
PS Mortgage Lending 305-791-4874 or 888-845-6630 - Miami, FL
"Mortgage Nerd" in Miami, Florida and Texas

Richie, I think it depends on the person. I'm sure there are people who use it as part of their everyday vocabulary, not as a singular designation of a sex or age group. I, personally, don't use these words when speaking to clients though, it just doesn't feel right to me. In certain situations I think it could be appropriate, but I prefer not to take the risk. Great post!

Sep 19, 2013 02:53 AM
Carie Shapiro
North Shore Suburbs & Chicago Real Estate - Evanston, IL

My grandfather used to say: "I don't care what you call me ... just don't call me late for supper!"  Simpler times back then, for sure :)

Sep 19, 2013 04:15 AM
Richie Alan Naggar
people first...then business Ran Right Realty - Riverside, CA
agent & author

EVERYONE TO CARIE'S HOUSE FOR A SNACK

Hello Phil...Relevant and precise commenting making us consider the matter even further...Thank you Phil

 

Carie my sweet?...And nobody missed a meal either...lol

Sep 19, 2013 05:08 AM
Ernie Steele
Lebanon, PA

Richie, they're all common terms in the diner/waitress biz around here but I wouldn't use them with my clients.

Sep 19, 2013 06:22 PM
Richie Alan Naggar
people first...then business Ran Right Realty - Riverside, CA
agent & author

Pal Ernie...Yes it is true what you say regarding the restaurant biz...those words make that business flow and go on clients agreed...However, everyone once in a while...a dear lady slips out and no one is hurt by it either

Sep 19, 2013 11:38 PM