Why Your Friend Listed or Bought With Another Agent!

Real Estate Agent with Rich Life Real Estate Team GA#242237

Why Your Friend Listed or Bought With Another Agent!


A few weeks ago a good friend at church came up to ask me for a bunch of advice on a home they had under contract.  The conversation went something like this, "Jared, I know you are a complete expert on real estate, and we have some difficult questions that our agent can't answer and need your help?"  A lot of people would be irritated that their friend had not used them on the purchase of their home, but for me it was a wakeup call, and I was glad to have the conversation.

Over the last few years our market in Georgia had become an investors market, with tightening bank regulations and many people having credit that is, shall we say, less than perfect, it made a lot of sense to focus on foreclosures and on investors.  Since I had a strong background in real estate investing I chose to focus on my several hundred investors.  My friends knew that I was selling a lot of investment properties, and that they heard me on the radio on Saturdays.  Frequently I got feedback that let me know that I was missing business that would have normally come my way.  What business are you leaving on the table?  Why did someone you have a great relationship  choose to list with someone else?  Why did they buy a home with a different agent?  Perhaps your friends fall into one of these categories:


  • They think you are so successful, so busy that you don't have time for their business.
  • They think their business is too small, that you only work with million dollar investors.
  • They think you only work with high end luxury homes.
  • They think you only work with first time home buyers.
  • You have not asked for the business.
  • You lost touch and they aren't even sure you are still in real estate?
  • They think you don't want to work with them because you didn't ask for the business.
  • You haven't put them into a marketing database to keep yourself front of mind.
  • You might not seem successful enough from the car you drive, the clothes you wear, the complaints you make, and they want to work with someone who they think knows real estate better because of their perception?
  • They think they have to work with the agent who's sign is in the yard, and nobody explained anything to them.
  • They don't even know you do real estate because you have never talked about it.
  • They bought a new construction home from the host or hostess that sits in the house and didn't understand agency!
  • Some other agent kept them in a drip campaign, and though they like you, they believe that agent earned the business.
  • You don't have their neighborhood in your farm and they see another agents sign over and over.
  • They might not want you to know their personal finances or credit history.
  • You might not have been reliable at the PTA, volunteer/charity service etc that they know you from?

Evaluating how we come across to our friends and neighbors, and what our messaging and communication is telling them is very important to being successful in the real estate business.  Your friends have to know you care the most, that you give the best service, have the most knowledge, are the best negotiator and can get them results!  Personal relationships are important because they build trust, perceived expertise is important because it builds credibility.  Understanding these issues will help you so you don't have to answer the question of Why your friend listed or bought with another agent!


Comments (9)

Graziella Bruner
NCS Premier Real Estate - Detroit, MI
Associate Broker - Serving Wayne & Oakland County

I truly understand - I remember one of my friends telling me that she just thought I was too busy with real estate that she just assumed that I wouldn't have the time to help her find a house.  She did buy off a sign call and 5 years later, she did call me and wanted me to list her home.  I've even had a friend who told me up front they didn't want me to know their financial status, so that's why they went with another agent.  The bottom line is that people want to know that you care and when it comes time for them, they want to be the one and only.

Nov 05, 2013 11:38 PM
John & Shannon Cox

Wow. I've had that same thing happen to me recently. I work with investors and even bid at the auction on occasion. I help my investors flip homes and that takes a lot of my time. But most of my business comes from traditional buying and selling. I have had some friends think that all I do is investor flips and they've gone with other agents. I need to be more aware of that.

Nov 06, 2013 04:54 AM
Jared Garfield
Rich Life Real Estate Team - Buford, GA
Invest With The Best For The Highest Returns!


I'm glad your friend came back around to list with you, I honestly think that many people make mistakes in not using their full time agent friends who would give great service just because of our failure to communicate regularly.

John and Shannon, 

You are so right, and while I tried to just make as comprehensive list as I could, I've experienced two or three of these myself too!

Nov 06, 2013 05:01 AM
Andrew Payne Realtor® Richmond VA Homes For Sale~804-938-5257~
Piedmont Real Estate - Richmond, VA
Richmond, VA, Real Estate, SRES®, NAR Green
It depends on the situation. Some friends already have other reliable friends they've known longer in the real estate business. However, I like that you suggest we keep reminding our friends about the type of work we do!
Nov 06, 2013 09:56 AM
Ed & Tracy Oliva
West USA Realty - Arizona - Fountain Hills, AZ
The Oliva Team Arizona Agents

Good Morning and stuff happens.  Keep up the good work and good luck with your business,   E

Nov 06, 2013 07:53 PM
Robert Fowler - 55CommunityGuide.com
President of Retirement Media Inc. - Braselton, GA
55+, Active Adult and Retirement Communities

Wow, there is a lot of ways to loose business.  As a property manager, I was not sure I ever wanted to manage for or lease to one of my friends.  I am sure in sales it is different.

Nov 14, 2013 11:36 AM
Jared Garfield
Rich Life Real Estate Team - Buford, GA
Invest With The Best For The Highest Returns!


That's very true, but it's also a list of how to keep clients, and to have your friends want to do business with you, by just flipping it!  I'll look forward to seeing you at our December Meetup in Atlanta for ActiveRain members!

Nov 14, 2013 11:43 AM
Jordon Wheeler
The Jordon Wheeler Group - Fairburn, GA
J W Group Real Estate Sales and Service

Hey Jared,

Excellent post!  I have explored this same topic with me and my agents, and we came away with many of the reasons for getting business from friends.  The most simple steps is to stay in touch and remind people of our business - real estate.

Best of GREAT success to you always!

Nov 14, 2013 12:57 PM
Debe Maxwell, CRS
www.iCharlotteHomes.com | The Maxwell House Group | RE/MAX Executive | (704) 491-3310 - Charlotte, NC
The right Charlotte REALTOR!

Jared, You're so right on every one of those!  If you don't stay in touch with your sphere, it's easy to lose them.  I know that your friend fit into that first category and I get that too.  I always tell them I'm never too busy for them!  I lost one to a neighborhood friend/agent.  I found my clients the house, they lived there a few years and became good friends with the neighbor agent.  We kept in constant contact with each other but, I knew that relationship (with children and families) was going to wind up with them selling with the other agent if they did ever sell.  Sure enough, they did - and they called me excited to tell me that they had just gone under Contract!!  They did apologize for using their friend and said, "We later talked about it and we should have asked you both to list it together!"  Yeah, that would have been nice but, I understood and moved on.  We still keep in touch though - and always will. 

Nov 20, 2013 12:17 PM

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