Paralysis By Analysis - a 49th Birthday resolution

Real Estate Agent with Samsel & Associates 0790808

I wish I could count the number of times I'd written a "Draft" blog post and then reviewed it and critiqued it and re-wrote it and finally deleted it. 

There have been thousands, maybe even millions, of times in my life when I wanted to say something to someone but didn't. Maybe it was "I'm sorry," or "I love you," or maybe it was "You're a jerk," but I held back, possibly out of respect but more likely out of fear.

How many invitations have I turned down because I might not know anyone else there and might feel awkward and didn't think I had the right outfit to wear? 

Do you suffer from Paralysis by Analysis, too? Seems to me that we regret the things we didn't do far more than the things that we actually do. 

Even though it's not New Years, I'm making a resolution. You see, I'm about to turn 49. And that's as good a time as any to rethink the habits that held me back and get rid of them. I don't want any regrets. I want to hit the ground running when I turn 50 next year. 

Join me?



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~ Wayne & Jean 

Union County, NJ - a great place to live and work!

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Fernando Herboso - Broker for Maxus Realty Group
Maxus Realty Group - Broker 301-246-0001 - Gaithersburg, MD
301-246-0001 Serving Maryland, DC and Northern VA

I'm on the other side. . and I can assure you. .it really works

short for words?. .embarrased?. . better them than me!

Nov 26, 2013 09:38 PM #3
Beth Atalay
Cam Realty and Property Management - Clermont, FL
Cam Realty of Clermont FL

Happy 49th Birthday to you! I've learned long time ago that I can't possibly please everyone, my actions, words can have a positive or negative impact on others. One thing I do know is that, I'm free when I just let it roll. There will be always some who may not like what I have to say, so be it!

Nov 26, 2013 09:57 PM #4
Michael Setunsky
Woodbridge, VA
Your Commercial Real Estate Link to Northern VA

Wayne and Jean Marie, I'm sure you will hit the ground running next year. Happy Birthday!


Nov 26, 2013 10:09 PM #5
Nancy Conner
Olympia, WA
Olympia/Thurston County WA
What a great resolution! I was just thinking that two local friends I most admire are VERY outspoken - and yet, even though people don't always agree with what they say, there is a deep admiration for their courage to be really authentic. I guess thinking about them & then reading your post first thing this morning is one of those "subtle" nudges from the universe to me - yes, count me in too on your resolution! :)
Nov 26, 2013 10:44 PM #6
Kathy Sheehan
Bay Equity, LLC 770-634-4021 - Atlanta, GA
Senior Loan Officer

The older I get, the more outspoken I find myself.  

Nov 26, 2013 10:49 PM #7
Amanda Christiansen
Christiansen Group Realty (260)704-0843 - Fort Wayne, IN
Christiansen Group Realty

Thankfully this is not an issue with me.  I'm a risk taker and I have a big mouth!  Good for you for wanting to make these changes.  Best of luck!

Nov 26, 2013 11:04 PM #8
Linda Piper
Planatek Financial, Inc. - Ventura, CA

Hi Wayne and Jean:

Happy 49th!

Your description of analysis paralysis really hit home with me.  You are right, I will regret the things I didn't do far far more than the things I did.  This is a very ggod reminder that waiting perfection can be a real road block.  Thank you.



Nov 26, 2013 11:05 PM #9
Richie Alan Naggar
people first...then business Ran Right Realty - Riverside, CA
agent & author

If not now...WHEN continues to be a relevant question all of us should ask and answer

Nov 26, 2013 11:05 PM #10
Bob Ratliff
Robert Ratliff Realty - San Antonio, TX
"Sold with Bob"

Howdy Jean/Wayne, Well if you ask me life just starts in ones forties, I'm fifty six years old and I have made so many changes in my life and I applaud you for writing this blog which is the first step to making many changes in your future to come. Thanks for sharing your story which I can totally relate to, I'm still growing each day and wish you great success.

Nov 26, 2013 11:29 PM #11
Hannah Williams
Re/Max Eastern inc. - Philadelphia, PA
Expertise NE Philadelphia & Bucks 215-953-8818

Happy Birthday ! I guess the older you get the less you care what other people think

Oh and Happy Thanksgiving

Nov 26, 2013 11:30 PM #12
Janis Borgueta
Key Properties of the Hudson Valley - Newburgh, NY
LIC RE Salesperson

Yes a great birthday resolution!! Happy Birthday and be brave!!

Nov 26, 2013 11:31 PM #13
Bob Stanis
JMR Properties LLC - North Fort Myers, FL

Powerful Post Wayne & Jean. I agree with everything you said. I used to suffer the same problem. Fear can be paralyzing. There was one question that I read somewhere that struck home with me and forced me to evolve past the "paralysis"

The question was "What would you do.. IF.. you weren't afraid?"

The answer to that question should be the very next step you take.

The sad truth is we all know what we should do but we let ouselves talk us out of it because we may suffer discomfort.

Posting this should prove that when a bold step is taken you'll find that 1.More people are supportive and on your side than you thought.... and 2. You are not alone. I think this post helped a lot of people re-examine how they approach situations that they fear will result in discomfort or embarrasment.

Happy Birthday! Go forth and Live a Long, Bold, and Fulfilling Life! No More regretts!


Nov 26, 2013 11:50 PM #14
Tom White
Franklin Homes Realty LLC (615) 495-0752 or - Franklin, TN
Franklin Homes Realty LLC, Franklin TN

Wayne and Jean, Happy B-Day! I think that's a great resolution. The old maxim, "Nothing ventured, nothing gained" really works.

Nov 27, 2013 12:56 AM #15
Helen and Larry Prier- Re-Max Gateway - Residential Real Estate
RE-MAX Gateway- Residential Real Estate Sales - Anacortes, WA
Anacortes & surrounding Skagit & Island Counties

Wayne and Jean, Happy Birthday. And yes that is a good resolution, you will find it very freeing. People will still like and love you as you are.

Nov 27, 2013 01:48 AM #16
Margaret Goss
Baird & Warner Real Estate - Winnetka, IL
Chicago's North Shore & Winnetka Real Estate

As others have said, the older you get, the more outspoken and bold you become.  Somewhat, where I used to sit back and watch, not I jump in and participate.  I think it just comes from realizing that you won't have forever to experience things.  

Nov 27, 2013 02:03 AM #17
Beth and Richard Witt
Long Island Cash Home Buyer - Huntington, NY
Long Island Cash Home Buyer 516-330-6940

Not sure which one of you will be having this wonderful birthday but I sure do  support you in hitting the game running full force... You go guys... Happy Day

Nov 27, 2013 02:15 AM #18
Matthew O'Hare
Osterville, MA

Sometimes the hardest step is, out of your own head. I think over analyzing yourself into inaction effects much more people  it doesn't.

Nov 27, 2013 04:35 AM #19
Debb Janes EcoBroker and Bernie Stea JD
ViewHomes of Clark County - Nature As Neighbors - Camas, WA
REALTORS® in Clark County, WA

Good for you. A wonderful resolution - and you're going to love 49 - and then your fifties. :)  Hope you have a Happy Thanksgiving - both of you.

Nov 27, 2013 07:17 AM #20
Joan Whitebook
BHG The Masiello Group - Nashua, NH
Consumer Focused Real Estate Services
A very good post.  This statement says it all for me.
"Seems to me that we regret the things we didn't do far more than the things that we actually do."
Nov 27, 2013 11:12 AM #21
Jeff Fritzson: Frisco Real Estate Pro
Jeff Fritzson Real Estate, Ebby Halliday Realtors - Frisco, TX
Your Success is My Focus!

When I find myaself in this situation, and I certainly do, I try to remember one of my favorite quotes, "you miss 100 percent of the shots you never take" - Wayne gretzky. 

Dec 02, 2013 01:12 AM #23
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Wayne and Jean Marie Zuhl

The Last Names You'll Ever Need in Real Estate
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