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Please Give Loved Ones Their Flowers While The Can Still Smell Them!

By
Real Estate Agent

Written by:
Darleen McCullen, REALTOR®, Broker
Keller Williams Realty
Phone: 919.454.8864
Email: darleen@darleenmc.com
Website: http://www.DarleenMc.com

 

The other night, while watching Oprah's Big Give, something occured to me. The Big Givers conducted acts of kindness for those who the doctors say will soon depart this Life soon - and I thought:

Why is it that we often wait until our loved ones are sick to do nice things for them - and to tell them how much we care?!

Lady with Flowers

As a child, I heard my maternal Grandmother say: "Give me my flowers while I can still smell them."

I wondered what she meant by that - but now there's no doubt in my mind. She wasn't only speaking of the physical flowers, but also the kind words that people had to say about her and to her.

We've all been to funerals where there were kind words said about the person. But of course, they can't hear them!

So, why not say the kind words to the person while you can look into their eyes and see their reactions - rather than wait?

Two of the most important people in my life are my parents. They have been married for more than 4 decades, and I applaud them.

Following Are the Top 10 Things I Learned from My Parents During Their First 40 Years of Marriage

1. They Taught Me the Difference Between Right and Wrong. As I was growing up, I always thought that my parents were a little strict on me. As a child, I couldn't really appreciate it, but now I surely do. One of the best compliments I've heard about my parents came from a gentleman I worked with in Corporate America years ago. His compliments went something like this:

"You must have really good parents. I have watched how you've conducted yourself, and how you don't compromise your values for anyone."

He was present once when I was asked by a manager to lie for him - and I refused to do so. Of course, my parents had taught me that it was wrong to lie under any circumstances - and also, I knew that if I lied for someone in management - who was to say that they wouldn't think I was an immoral person who may later lie to them about something?

 

Praying Woman

2. My Parents Taught me the Importance of Prayer: Each morning before school, we would take time to pray. To this day, a relationship with God is still important in my life. I am so thankful for all of the many blessings in my life. Sometimes, I feel so undeserving for all of the great things that have happened to me.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

McCullen Family Historic Pictures3. Family is Important: I've heard it said that: You can pick your friends, you can pick your nose, but you can't pick your family. LOL. At the end of the day, your family is the one that's going to be there for you-to listen, to stick by you, and to help you out of difficult situations. When the going gets rough, you can always depend on family!

 

Old family McCullen family photos, including my parents' high school graduation pictures & original marriage license (1966)

 

 

 

Corporate Ladder4. Never Step on Other People: Because the same people you step on the way up, you'll see them on the way down. I sometimes watched as people in Corporate stabbed others in the back- but I'm proud to say that after 16 years of working in a Corporate environment, I never stabbed anyone in the back or lied to anyone. Mom and Dad, you taught me right! It's not always popular to do the right thing - but it surely pays off in the end!

 

 

 

 

 

 

5. Be Self-Sufficient: My dad passed this down from his father: "There comes a time when every tub must stand on its own bottom." I thought this was very interesting - and again, I didn't understand what this meant when I was younger. But now I realize that it means that instead of always relying on someone else to solve one's problems, as individuals, we must stand on our own and just figure out what to do!

Helping Hand6. Help Others: "To whom much is given, much is required." (a paraphrase of St. Luke 12:48 - KJV). My parents have always been an excellent example of reaching out to help others in need-and for doing what's right-even when it wasn't popular. I have watched my parents work tirelessly through the years in the Church and community. They have always been willing to help young couples who may have been experiencing problems within their marriages - or a youngster who might have otherwise been "lost" if it hadn't been for my parents' guidance.

At my parents' 40th anniversary celebration, there were a number of individuals who were not originally on the Program who felt compelled to speak about how much my parents had helped them through the years. It was amazing how many people they've helped - and the example they've set by simply living by principles of the Golden Rule.

7. Encouraging and Inspiring: No matter how lofty the goals, my parents would never laugh or discourage me. (Sometimes even I couldn't believe some of the goals I set for myself!) My mother would always encourage me by saying things like, "The sky is the limit"-and her yardstick of measurement while I was in college was, "Those other kids are doing it, aren't they?" If they could do it-then I could, too! You see, it's not always the smartest people who succeed - but those who are persistent!

8. Meet People Where They Are: Don't try to change people. I believe their marriage has lasted so long because they respect each other. I'm sure there are/were things they wanted to change, but at the end of the day, people are going to be who they are-and won't change unless they really want to do so.

9. They Sacrificed for their Children: They sacrificed so much so that we could have a better life. This, no doubt, meant that they had to do without so that I could achieve. Because of their sacrifices, I am the person I am today.

10. Work Hard: My parents are excellent examples of working hard to achieve one's goals. I remember times when my mother would say to me, "It doesn't matter if you have to go to bed late and get up early" so that I could make good grades and measure up - or to fulfill some work obligation. Those same lessons have stuck with me to this day! They are prime examples of this-they work hard at whatever it is they do. What a great example!

 

 

So...Who do you need to call or let know how much they mean to you?

Please take a moment to listen to this song from Stevie Wonder, "These Three Words", which speaks volumes...

Darleen McCullen,

REALTOR® on a Mission... NOT Just Seeking a Commission!TM

Phone: 919.454.8864
Website: http://www.darleenmc.com/

Disclaimer: Opinions expressed by those who are part of the ActiveRain community, including those providing comments relating to this blog, are their opinions and their alone - and do NOT reflect the opinions of Darleen McCullen and Keller Williams Realty. Darleen McCullen and Keller Williams Realty are not responsible for the accuracy (or lack thereof) or content provided by others.

Comments (15)

Cynthia Tilghman, Realtor® Onslow County NC Home Specialist
Kingsbridge Realty, Inc - Hubert, NC
Good Morning Darleen,
My Grannie says something very similar to this, what she says is "visit me while I'm alive and can talk to you, don't wait for my funeral".  Makes a lot of sense, doesn't it?  We need to appreciate and enjoy the people in our lives while we can, life is much too short.  Another thing Grannie says is "I don't think on your death bed you'll be saying 'I wish I had worked more".  
Apr 09, 2008 12:16 AM
Darleen McCullen
Raleigh, NC
Broker - Raleigh, NC Real Estate
Cynthia ~ Good morning. Grandmothers have so much wisdom, don't they? I agree with your Grannie - that on our death beds, we will NOT wish that we'd worked more - but rather that we would've spent more time with family and friends - and enjoying life to the fullest.
Apr 09, 2008 12:39 AM
* Rate A Home
Rate A Home - Saugatuck, MI
Darleen, great ThemThem to your Mom & Dad, to awesome. Thanks for sharing this great post!
Apr 09, 2008 06:02 AM
Darleen McCullen
Raleigh, NC
Broker - Raleigh, NC Real Estate
Duane~ Thank you so much. My parents are great people - and I'm fortuate to have the love.
Apr 09, 2008 10:17 AM
Robert L. Brown
www.mrbrownsellsgr.com - Grand Rapids, MI
Grand Rapids Real Estate Bellabay Realty, West Mic
Values. An undying art. I look at some of the young people and see how they treat others. It all stems from home. At least it should come from your upbinging.
Apr 09, 2008 11:32 AM
Darleen McCullen
Raleigh, NC
Broker - Raleigh, NC Real Estate
Robert ~ Values do indeed start at home. We can't count on athletes, politicians, or other public figures to instill values in our kids.
Apr 09, 2008 11:48 AM
Patricia Kennedy
RLAH@Properties - Washington, DC
Home in the Capital
Darleen, what a beautiful, heartfelt post!  You're clearly one who has been given much!  I just love your blog!
Apr 09, 2008 12:28 PM
Darleen McCullen
Raleigh, NC
Broker - Raleigh, NC Real Estate
Patricia ~ Thank you so much for your compliments. To whom much is given, much is definitely required!
Apr 09, 2008 12:43 PM
Jason Crouch
Austin Texas Homes, LLC - Austin, TX
Broker - Austin Texas Real Estate (512-796-7653)
Darleen - I LOVED this post.  You made some excellent points here.  I am including this one in the Family Ties recap today.
Apr 15, 2008 07:28 AM
Darleen McCullen
Raleigh, NC
Broker - Raleigh, NC Real Estate
Jason ~ Hi. Thank you so much for your compliment - and for including it in the Family Ties recap.
Apr 15, 2008 11:32 AM
Vanessa Stalets
RE/MAX Elite - Brentwood, TN
REALTOR, Brentwood TN Homes, Real Estate
Wow, married forty years. I cannot even imagine what that is like or looks like. How wonderful to have such great role models to help shape you, I love the list! Thank you!
Apr 15, 2008 03:00 PM
Darleen McCullen
Raleigh, NC
Broker - Raleigh, NC Real Estate
Vanessa ~ Yes, 40 + years. I can't imagine it either! It's been nothing but God + many years of love.
Apr 15, 2008 03:03 PM
Lanre-"THE REAL ESTATE FARMER" Folayan
Samson Properties - Bowie, MD
I don't make promises.I deliver results.SOLD HOMES
I thank Jason Crouch for posting this blog on one of the blogs that he wrote. Darleen this is definitely one of the my favorite blogs so far this year. And thanks for teaching me that scripture - To whom much is given,much is required. I always wanted to know what scripture that was in the Bible. Prayer changes thing -No matter what trials and tribulations you are going through. God is still alive and well.  You are such a professional. 40 years of marriage. Its great to have great parents to help you become the woman with class that you are.Thank God for our parents,their knowledge and wisdom. Great post.
Apr 17, 2008 11:03 AM
Darleen McCullen
Raleigh, NC
Broker - Raleigh, NC Real Estate
Lanre ~ Thank you so much for your compliment. And yes, our parents do shape us. I'm blessed beyond measure.
Apr 17, 2008 11:20 AM
Gayle Rich-Boxman Fishhawk Lake Real Estate
John L Scott Market Center - Birkenfeld, OR
"Your Local Expert!" 503-739-3843

Darleen, you've been *FEATURED* in today's Tuesday Travelogue! 

                                            Travellers in the Rain!

   

 

 

Mar 07, 2017 05:03 AM