Just Say NO!

By
Real Estate Agent with Solutions Real Estate CA DRE #01490977

Just Say NO!

 

Sometimes, you need to say no.

 

My NO ButtonIt’s not something I’m particularly good at.

 

I don’t really have an issue when it has to do with my business, especially when there are requests for things I cannot provide or feel are inappropriate. There’s a nice way to say no.

 

Sometimes the answer may be “not yet” rather than no. Or “not right now”.

 

But there are times when I know I should say no but don’t. It gets me in trouble with overextending myself, helping out when I really don’t have the time, or taking on more than I can realistically handle, even when it is something I really would like to do.

 

Not saying no also gets in the way of accomplishing time-sensitive tasks, or getting me distracted by superfluous things.

 

I have a small label taped to my laptop to help keep this perspective. It says, simply, “Just Say No!” It’s a nice reminder when I find myself getting distracted by the phone, email, or other tasks I might prefer to do but which interfere with things I need to get done.

 

It’s also helpful when I am on the phone and need that reminder that I should “just say NO.” I do it nicely, of course.

 

And sometimes, an artificial aid is useful.

 

A very good friend gave this NO button to me for my birthday. It sits on my desk next to my laptop in my office. I play it now and then for fun. But it’s a great reminder just seeing it there. Especially when I find myself saying when I should say no.

 

Go on. Click. You know you want to. No?! I don’t believe you.

 

 

 

close

Re-Blogged 2 times:

Re-Blogged By Re-Blogged At
  1. Lenn Harley 11/28/2013 08:34 PM
  2. Praful Thakkar 11/29/2013 01:10 PM
Topic:
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Groups:
Active Rain Newbies
Certified Residential Specialists
Southern California Real Estate Forum
Addicted to Active Rain
San Diego Realtors®
Tags:
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Rainmaker
3,858,457
Dorie Dillard CRS GRI ABR
Coldwell Banker United Realtors® ~ 512.750.6899 - Austin, TX
Serving Buyers & Sellers in NW Austin Real Estate

Good morning Jeff,

Love the video! We all have to learn this word and use it when needed! I have a button that says "That was Easy!" I press it after I have said "No" to reinforce my action!

Nov 28, 2013 08:47 PM #27
Ambassador
1,207,759
Amanda Christiansen
Christiansen Group Realty (260)704-0843 - Fort Wayne, IN
Christiansen Group Realty

I've found myself in the same position Jeff.  It's nice to help, but it's not worth over extending yourself and not being able to take care of your own business.

Nov 28, 2013 09:14 PM #28
Rainmaker
404,729
Bill and MaryAnn Wagner
Wagner Real Estate Group - Ocean City, NJ
Jersey Shore and South Jersey Real Estate
Jeff,

Great Button. I think I'll get one to keep next to my home phone so I can tap it every time I get one of those annoying telemarketing calls.

Nov 28, 2013 09:48 PM #29
Rainmaker
3,213,210
Nina Hollander
Coldwell Banker Residential Brokerage - Charlotte, NC
Your Charlotte/Ballantyne/Waxhaw/Fort Mill Realtor

Love the button! But here's what I've found--that once you get used to saying NO in the right way, it really does get a lot easier to do it.

Nov 28, 2013 10:09 PM #30
Rainmaker
2,485,290
Richie Alan Naggar
people first...then business Ran Right Realty - Riverside, CA
agent & author

I am an advocate for a persons No & yes...to mean something. If not, they are just noises the mouth makes

Nov 28, 2013 10:33 PM #31
Rainmaker
2,826,561
Kathleen Daniels
KD Realty - 408.972.1822 - San Jose, CA
San Jose Homes for Sale-Probate & Trust Specialist

Jeff, I’ve said it before and I am sure I will say it again many times. No is the biggest little word in any language. It is part of my business plan for 2014 … I plan to use it more often and eliminate a lot of wasted time trying to be nice to those that don’t give a damn about me in the first place.  Did I just say that, out loud?  

Nov 28, 2013 10:40 PM #32
Rainmaker
1,958,100
Andrew Mooers | 207.532.6573
MOOERS REALTY - Houlton, ME
Northern Maine Real Estate-Aroostook County Broker

Enabler, can you say enabler? Sure you can, I knew you could. Now "no" can you say "no"... come on, say "no". Just say "no" or don't whine, complain and get all snarky upset when it all goes back to how did I get myself in the eye of a twister. Ask questions, listen to your gut, deep down in your bones instincts from experience. And you get better as saying "no" with a major relief feeling of being oh so glad. Because you remember painfully what happened the last time you said yes and regretted it dearly when the answer to avoid the buzzer should have been N-O.

Nov 28, 2013 11:13 PM #33
Rainmaker
656,772
Bill Reddington
Re/max Southern Realty - Destin, FL
Destin Florida Real Estate

I like you wish I used the word more often. NO! Not that hard to say. In this business it seems we try to accomodate the world. Am getting better at it.

Nov 28, 2013 11:21 PM #34
Rainmaker
1,815,397
Lottie Kendall
Compass - San Francisco, CA
Helping make your real estate dreams a reality

Jeff, I pushed the button -- expected great help in learning how to say "no."  Why is it so hard to do?

Nov 29, 2013 12:22 AM #35
Rainmaker
2,190,192
Elizabeth Weintraub Sacramento Realtor Top 1%
RE/MAX Gold - Sacramento, CA
Put 40 years of experience to work for you

No is a favorite word. It's an extremely powerful word. I don't offer excuses for it, either, which would only dilute its power. I've had people stare at me with that look in their eyes that says, "How could you be so RUDE?" Which is really code for, "I wish I had the guts to say no myself."

//

Nov 29, 2013 12:43 AM #36
Rainmaker
257,245
Vanessa Saunders
Global Property Systems Real Estate - White Plains, NY
From Manhattan to the Catskills of New York

This is particularly hard for the "people pleaser" personality types. YES can be so ingrained in the DNA!

Nov 29, 2013 12:46 AM #37
Ambassador
4,070,367
Jeff Dowler, CRS
Solutions Real Estate - Carlsbad, CA
The Southern California Relocation Dude

Lynn - well the dough is done and we are getting redy to head for LA - look for pics later tonight. Thanks for the recipe - I'm going to save it on my online recipe file (which is a good percentage of desserts!

Sylvia - I indeed, and I usually DO feel good when I say no. Thanksgiving was wonderful...except I did NOT say NNO enough. LOL

Thanks, Fred. Hope yours was wonderful. Yep, there are lots of ways to decline and say no, and to do it nicely. NO, by itself, can be a bit cold

Evelyn - EVERYONE should have one, if nothing other than for fun

Jeff

Nov 29, 2013 01:22 AM #38
Ambassador
2,567,604
Ed Silva
RE/MAX Professionals, CT 203-206-0754 - Waterbury, CT
Central CT Real Estate Broker Serving all equally

I have come very proficient in the word NO. I was taught by my mother and wife

Nov 29, 2013 04:48 AM #39
Rainmaker
1,469,254
Kat Palmiotti
406-270-3667, kat@thehousekat.com, Broker, Blackstone Realty Group - brokered by eXp Realty - Kalispell, MT
The House Kat

And as that video shows, there are a LOT of ways to say NO.   Simple word, not so simple to use, but very useful!

Nov 29, 2013 06:07 AM #40
Rainmaker
545,999
Lori Cain
eXp Realty - Tulsa, OK
Midtown Tulsa Real Estate Top Producer

Hahaha, Jeff - I NEED one of those! Cute video!

I called a girlfriend one year to ask her to serve on an annual fundraising committee for a non-profit. It was a courtesy call, in my mind. When I asked if she could help again this year, she said, "NO."  I was stumped. After I caught my breath, I asked her how she did that. She said, "I've been expecting your call, and I've written "NO" on a piece of paper that's sitting by the phone!  We laughed about it.  Smart on her part.

Nov 29, 2013 06:34 AM #41
Rainmaker
420,748
Michelle Francis
Tim Francis Realty LLC - Atlanta, GA
Realtor, Buckhead Atlanta Homes for Sale & Lease

Jeff, 

Just said NO recently to a client who I took on when I really should have known better.  We were just writing up a lease for a new tenant when she insisted I add a stipulation about "No children allowed EVER" in the unit.  It's not an adult only community and our brokerage won't do that as it's illegal.  Not worth it and I won't spend 10 seconds arguing about anything someone wants me to do that is illegal.  

The owner tried to relent and say if we insisted, she could allow children.  By that time, we shared we just weren't the right folks to help her and pulled our listing.  Life is too short and just saying NO is great advice.

All the best, Michelle

Nov 29, 2013 07:55 AM #42
Ambassador
1,154,798
Bryan Robertson
Los Altos, CA

I still need to learn to say no more often.  I'm not good at it as I frequently want to help people so when they ask, I vounteer.  Sometimes there are good reasons to say no and not just to be dismissive.

Nov 29, 2013 11:54 AM #43
Rainmaker
1,080,029
Sharon Alters
Coldwell Banker Vanguard Realty - 904-673-2308 - Fleming Island, FL
Realtor - Homes for Sale Fleming Island FL

Jeff, I think we should have a Christmas special to help us with our New Year's Resolution of Just Saying No to unnecessary entanglements and unserious buyers/sellers.

Nov 29, 2013 12:29 PM #44
Ambassador
4,301,228
Praful Thakkar
LAER Realty Partners - Andover, MA
Andover, MA: Andover Luxury Homes For Sale

Jeff, I could not say 'NO' to watching the video - however, I learned many different ways to say 'NO'!

Nov 29, 2013 12:34 PM #45
Rainmaker
1,325,451
Nick T Pappas
Assoc. Broker/Broker ABR, CRS, SFR, e-Pro, @Homes Realty Group, @HomesBirmingham & Providence Property Mgmnt, LLC Hun... - Huntsville, AL
Madison & Huntsville Alabama Real Estate Resource

Jeff, no works for me, but I found myself occasionally placing an expletive before or after "NO"!!  Just for fun, of course!

Dec 03, 2013 07:04 AM #46
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