How to Break the Loop of Shame & Reach Your Goals

Reblogger Michelle Carr Crowe,Altas Just Call...408-252-8900!
Real Estate Agent with Get Results Team...Just Call (408) 252-8900! . DRE #00901962 . Licensed to Sell since 1985 . Altas Realty DRE# 00901962 Lic.1985

As we prepare to welcome 2014, naturally it's time to also re-visit our goals. Here is some good advice. Set aside the the chunks of time needed to make the goal a reality rather than mere deadlines. Even bett, enlistntwo other people to make a triad of accountability partners to keep everyone on track for achieving the 2014 goals.

Original content by Pamela Graham RS297950

Ugh. I ate the whole cheesecake again


Here’s a simple shift in thinking that can help you reach your goals and spare you the “loop of shame.” You know the loop of shame.

The loop of shame goes like this:

1. You say: “By X date, I will Y.”

2. You feel good about “having a goal.”
3. Life gets busy.
4. Date X comes, and you haven’t made any real progress on Y.
5. You eat a cheesecake.
6. Full of regret and fresh resolve, you decide it’s time to change!
7. You say: “By X date, I will Y.”

… and so on. Okay, maybe it’s not always a cheesecake, but you get the idea.

The loop of shame is all to easy to fall into. In our minds, simply setting a goal can feel a lot like making progress towards a goal. Of course it’s not. So how do you break the loop of shame and make real progress?

The problem is the deadline. Deadlines are comfortably far in the future. We have plenty of time. But deadlines aren’t action. They’re merely an arbitrary line in the sand.

The trick to breaking the loop of shame is to dispense with the deadline and instead schedule time to work on the goal. Don’t say: “I’m going to lose ten pounds by January.” Say: “Tomorrow at 6PM I’m going to take an hour walk in the neighborhood.” Don’t say: “Next year I’m going to have 100 more followers on Twitter.” Say: “Tomorrow morning at 8AM I’m going to spend thirty minutes and find six interesting articles to tweet about throughout the week.”

You reach goals through action, but to take action you must schedule time for the action. If you want to do something you’ve never done in the past, you have to start doing something you’re not currently doing, right?

Schedule time for progress and progress you will make.  Email us at


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Gerard Gilbers
Higher Authority Markeing - Asheboro, NC
Your Marketing Master

These are great tips, make daily action goals that will lead you to the ultimate goal you are after. 

Dec 29, 2013 02:34 PM #1
Joe Petrowsky
Mortgage Consultant, Right Trac Financial Group, Inc. NMLS # 2709 - Manchester, CT
Your Mortgage Consultant for Life

What a great choice for a re-blog. There is so much wisdom in the post. Without accountability and support to help with one's goals, it is tough to accomplish them alone.

Make it a great week!

Dec 29, 2013 06:00 PM #2
Larry Lawfer
YourStories Realty Group powered by Castles UnlimitedĀ® - Newton, MA
"I listen for a living." It's all about you.

I would have missed this had you not reposted it. Thanks for the good read and best of luck on all your new goals.

Dec 29, 2013 08:54 PM #3
Sarah Lynn Jaskowski
Williamsville, NY
House. Home. Today.

Very good read!  And now I want to eat a cheesecake... thanks ;)

I do create daily/weekly goals.  Going to plan them more carefully in 2014 to stick to them!  Happy New Year!

Dec 30, 2013 02:40 AM #4
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