Why Good Communication Skills are Necessary in Real Estate and in Life

Real Estate Agent with Florida Property Experts

A real estate dilemma... Proper communication in real estate business... or any business!

I was just reading a post by Jason Crouch, who is the owner of a real estate brokerage in Austin, Texas. Jason's post is titled "How to properly leave a brokerage-Am I wrong to expect a call?" Jason was discussing the reasons why REALTORS® choose to leave one brokerage and move to another. But he was most puzzled by why some agents just transfer their real estate licenses, without even having the courtesy of having a conversation with their soon-to-be previous broker.

  • If you're not in the industry, just in case you're not aware of the procedures, real estate agents and REALTORS® are independent contractors, not employees, and as such, if one desires to leave a brokerage and move to another, all they need to do is transfer their license, using one simple form.

After reading Jason's post, as I was typing in a comment, I realized I should just share something my parents experienced when they were in full-time ministry. This was a lesson in communication, that my mother learned the hard way.people talking

When I was younger, my father began pastoring a church here in Central Florida. Although my dad had been a guest speaker at this church on many occasions, he had just begun officially pastoring there, so my parents didn't know all of the members of the congregation. As you know, the job of a pastor is to "shepherd the flock", but to do so, you have to really get to know the people. So the people who did know my parents pretty well, took it upon themselves to have several pot luck dinners and other such typical church gatherings, to show their support of my parents, and encourage the other church members to get to know my parents.

Fairly early on, some of the long-time church congregants came to my mother about one woman who was doing a lot of griping and complaining. So my mom started going out of her way to always ask this woman how she was doing and make small talk, and be encouraging to her. And the woman would always act like everything was just fine, and never tell my mother any of the things she was saying to other people in the church. 

Well, my mother always taught me that pretty much anything can be worked out through open communication. So my mom finally decided to pay this woman a house call, where they could talk privately, in a non-confrontational manner, in the comfort of this woman's own home. So my mom brought over a vase of flowers and some home-baked goodies and stopped women talkingby for a chat.

To make a long story short, the woman talked about everything BUT her complaints. She would only make small talk and not discuss anything more. So my mom finally asked her in a more direct manner, if she had any problems with the changes that had been made at the church, and assured her that it was OK for her to say whatever was on her mind. But the woman denied having any issues at all! She continued pretending everything was fine... but never came back to the church!

My mom told me this story because she wanted me to understand that some people can't handle confrontation, even when it's not really confrontation. (I've since then experienced a similar situation with someone who was a friend, that I never would have guessed was petrified of even the slightest confrontation!) Some of us are direct and to-the-point and wish people would just get to the point and say what they mean! But there are people who will never tell you what they're really thinking, not matter how you approach them. man refuses to talk

In Jason's case, as he is wondering why some agents leave a real estate brokerage without ever having the courtesy to discuss their reasons for leaving, I can't speak for Jason, but from my perspective, that may not even be a confrontation. I left a brokerage last year and just walked into my manager's office and told him I was leaving. I gave him my 2 main reasons and said that any other reasons were minor and not even worth mentioning, and that I had no real problems with any of the people. And I told him my reasons for transferring to the new brokerage. The entire conversation may have lasted 10 minutes. And I frequently stop by now, just to socialize with all the friends I made there over the years.

Like Jason, I can't understand why some people have so much trouble just speaking their minds. But I guess those same people can't understand how I can be so direct. I frequently make jokes with the people who know me, that I am the voice of what everyone else is thinking, but afraid to say. LOL!  And I suspect that it's people with the direct personalities who get the most frustrated realtor and real estate clientswith the ones who beat around the bush, or are never able to have an open conversation. I can only guess at how shy people feel, since I've NEVER been even remotely shy.

I would say Viva la Difference! But as Jason said, because a REALTOR® had left his brokerage without the courtesy of even a small conversation, that bridge is burned. If you're one of the people who finds it difficult to discuss your issues with others, if I may, let me offer a tidbit of advice from the proverbial Sales 101 handbook. If you're thinking of the next phone call or meeting or appointment as a problem or a confrontation, you're more likely to handle it wrong. But if you look at it as an opportunity to solve a problem, or even better yet, if you look at it as just a conversation, or brainstorming session, it opens your mind up to an easy dialogue. And that's my 2 cents =)

If you're interested in buying or selling real estate in the Daytona Beach area, you need a REALTOR® with the communication skills to handle any obstacles that may arise during your real estate transaction. Make a Smart Choice and contact Lisa C. Hill for all your real estate needs.


Lisa C Hill real estate agent with Adams Cameron

list and sell real estate with lisa hill

Comments (8)

Lola Audu
Lola Audu~Audu Real Estate~Grand Rapids, MI Real Estate - Grand Rapids, MI
Audu Real Estate~Grand Rapids, MI ~Welcome Home!
Hi Lisa, Your blog post was filled with wisdom and good advise. 
Mar 20, 2008 02:58 PM
Jason Crouch
Austin Texas Homes, LLC - Austin, TX
Broker - Austin Texas Real Estate (512-796-7653)
Lisa - This is a terrific post, and I thank you for mentioning and linking to mine.  On a related note, when we left our previous church about three years ago, my wife and I spent the entire afternoon speaking with one of the pastors about things.  Consequently, we felt good about our decision and the way that we handled things with them.  I saw one of the pastors a few days ago at a mutual friend's house, and it was really nice - we laughed and had a great time.  If we had just disappeared, I wouldn't have had that comfort level.
Mar 20, 2008 03:22 PM
Alexander Harb
Knights Investing - Mesquite, TX
Dallas, Texas Real Estate Investing

NICE post on honesty and openness, sis......

I had a feeling you were a Christian, Lisa...... I just needed the facts straight from YOU...and now I have them....

YOU are a PREACHERS Kid.....


Mar 20, 2008 06:06 PM
Lisa Hill
Florida Property Experts - Daytona Beach, FL
Daytona Beach Real Estate

Lola- Thank you. This one was a bit troublesome, getting started. It took a while to get my thoughts into words. I guess that's food for thought, too =)

Jason- Our previous church was difficult for us to leave, because the leadership had become so controlling, and I was on the worship team. We DID discuss it, but it was very stressful. We already knew that God was leading us elsewhere, so we finally had to just say "Look. We're moving on. We've prayed about it and we have no doubt about this decision and there's no need to discuss it anymore". (They disagreed about us leaving.) That church has since been dissolved! BUT, when we see any of the people from that once thriving congregation, it's all OK. Time does heal wounds if you let them heal. And God wants unity. So sometimes I guess we just have to overlook some inevitable human faults... and NOT gossip about them! (Sometimes I have to preach to myself) 

Alex- Yep. I'm a PK. *sigh* I could tell so many stories... LOL! It's best to just laugh about them. 

Mar 20, 2008 07:37 PM
Debra Gambill
Weichert Realtor's Southern Coast - North Myrtle Beach, SC
Realtor, N.C. / S.C
Hi Lisa - very good post- lots of good advice- good communication skills is an art
Mar 20, 2008 10:52 PM
Laura Karambelas
Baird & Warner Downers Grove - Downers Grove, IL
Realtor - Downers Grove
Lisa- I am like you....I am very direct, forward, whatever you want to call it.  Most of us leave one company for another because we believe it will benefit our business.  I've always had a good rapport with my managing brokers and when I left I have always had a conversation with them.  Thanks for the post because it's good advice.  "Never burn your bridges". 
Mar 20, 2008 11:57 PM
Gary L. Waters Broker Associate, Bucci Realty
Bucci Realty, Inc. - Melbourne, FL
Fifteen Years Experience in Brevard County
I am one of those non-confrontational types however I can be direct, succinct, and polite. Such was my manner of leaving my previous broker. Good post, Lisa!
Mar 21, 2008 01:39 AM
Lisa Hill
Florida Property Experts - Daytona Beach, FL
Daytona Beach Real Estate

Debra- Thank you, and good communication is definitely something that has to be learned. We're not just born with it.

Laura- Agreed. You never know when you might need the people on the other side of that bridge.

Gary- Actually, I don't like confrontation either. But I'm also not afraid of it. And leaving doesn't really have to be a confrontation unless you already know the OTHER person is going to make it that way. In that case, the less said, the better. 

Mar 21, 2008 04:51 PM

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