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How much do you???

By
Industry Observer

How much do you share of yourself with your community?

Is there a boundary? Game of Life

Are there just some things that you don't share with the world?

These are some of the questions I have been pondering the past few days.

In this game called life that we are in, we are told to put our best face forward all the time.

I have read stories and posts where people have spoke about things that were not so warm and fuzzy or that did not put their best face forward, but showed that they were human and had problems like everyone else. Or maybe they just wanted to rant about something. Does that reflect poorly on them? Or does it make them more real to you.

So I pose the question....

How much do you share?

Do you only share the good things?

Do you let people know when things arent going your way?

Would you do business with someone who you knew had some hard times and came through them or would you rather go with the ALWAYS UPBEAT~LIFE IS PERFECT~ person who acts as though they have not a care in the world.

I am curious. I am actually asking myself the same questions.

How about when it comes to friends? Do we only want to have friends who never share their struggles or is it okay every once in awhile, to have them cry in their cheerios? I think life would be boring if all the people we were around were perfect all the time. Life is a potpouri of people and it is the different flavors that makes the pot interesting.

Friends

I have a friend who has lost a 19 year old to an overdose, her ex husband killed himself, her oldest son wont talk to her and refuses to let her see her grandson and her 2 younger kids BOTH had to have ICD`s put in. I have seen people shun her because of the things that havehappen in her life. People talk, they gossip, yet they don't ever reach out, or try to walk even a step in her shoes. Yet, I wouldn't trade my friendship with her for anything. We know each other better than most.

People seem to run away when people have problems. They make judgements. I know, I have done the same thing.

                                                                                                                                                                         Underdog

I am one of those people who like the underdog stories. The stories of people who came from nothing and fought and scraped and struggled their way out of the pit. Those people I can relate to. But I feel I am still digging, I am not out of the pit yet. I like a good success story. But in order to get to the success, they had to go through some failures.

Are you the kind of person who will stand by them through the failures to watch them get to the success? Will you cheer them on from the stands or will you get out there on the track and run with them. Or... will you just change the channel.

 

How much do you want people to share.... how much do you share of yourself?

Curious in Arkansas,

Susan

 

 

 

 

Posted by

Susan Davis

Daniel J. Brudnok, REALTOR
Berkshire Hathaway Home Services Fox & Roach, REALTORS - Exton - PA License #RS-225179-L / Delaware License #RS-0025038 - Downingtown, PA
SRES, e-PRO,ABR,GREEN,CSP

Susan,

I tend to fall to sharing mostly the positive.  When I share the not so positive it is in a way that I hope brings light to a topic and may even help ease the issue......

Being part of the community opens yourself to many situations and events that (good or bad) will always have an effect on someone else.

Apr 13, 2008 09:24 AM
Chuck Carstensen
RE/MAX Results - Elk River, MN
Minnesota/Wisconsin Real Estate Expert
I share the positive.  I don't like burdening people with the negative much.  Every once and a while I may share something that has got me off center....
Apr 13, 2008 09:28 AM
Susan Davis
Austin, TX
Excellence Advocate

Dan: Thanks for the comment. I agree, if we are going to share a negative, we should do it in a way that brings a positive to someone.

Chuck: The way I see it, If we never shared things that were negative, we could lose sight of all the positive in the the world. I tend to take some things granted until I hear of someone less fortunate than myself. And, I might be able to make a difference in the situation! Who knows!!

Thanks for the comments!

Susan

Apr 13, 2008 09:32 AM
Tony Fantis
Fantis Group Real Estate - Salt Lake City, UT
Realtor,Principal Broker - Salt Lake City
Good question!  My marketing rep explained it as three circles.  The outside circle is what everybody gets to see.  The inside circle is what only your best friends get to see.  For everyone, the comfort level for each circle is different.  I think it's a personal choice.
Apr 13, 2008 09:36 AM
SacramentoCommercialLoans Bank Turn downs welcomed
Sacramento commercial loans - Sacramento, CA
Quick closings 916-847-7212

Is this a fair question? After all no two people see the world the same. That could be said for points of view. I see many people on here that it seems that they are here to make friends rather than business, and some folks that are nothing but business. So I guess as long as yo are ok sharing these stories it should not matter ,after all if you dont like it dont read it and if you like folks that express everything well you found a perfect match.

Apr 13, 2008 09:49 AM
Greg Hampton
Re/Max Around The Mountains - Blue Ridge, GA
North Georgia Mountain Property,Blue Rid
I share too much info most of the time. I just need confirmation.
Apr 13, 2008 09:54 AM
Susan Davis
Austin, TX
Excellence Advocate

Tony: I have a background in Marketing and I have heard of this concept. I agree and Thanks for reminding me of it!

Robert: Yes, this is very much a matter of personal choice. That is why I was wondering what others thought about it! It is intersting to see the way people react to certain things.

Greg: I tend to lean on that side myself. Thanks for letting me know I am not alone!

Thanks for stopping by and sharing your points of view!

Susan

Apr 13, 2008 09:56 AM
Mike Frazier
Carousel Realty of Dyer County - Dyersburg, TN
Northwest Tennessee Realtor

Sharon,

I always try to be there to listen when a friend needs me. I have found that people for the most part just want someone to "listen".

Apr 13, 2008 10:00 AM
Greg Hampton
Re/Max Around The Mountains - Blue Ridge, GA
North Georgia Mountain Property,Blue Rid
great stuff.
Apr 13, 2008 12:00 PM
Greg Hampton
Re/Max Around The Mountains - Blue Ridge, GA
North Georgia Mountain Property,Blue Rid

Sometimes it seems that when you do something bad,people remember forever. On the other hand ,when you do something good you get about 10 minutes credit.I am glad that God is the real score keeper.

Apr 13, 2008 12:07 PM
Greg Hampton
Re/Max Around The Mountains - Blue Ridge, GA
North Georgia Mountain Property,Blue Rid
I am thankfull that God is the scorer, and that his memory is short.
Apr 13, 2008 12:09 PM
Susan Davis
Austin, TX
Excellence Advocate

Mike: I agree. I do think there are times when people just need to be heard. Then there are times when people need to know that people care. I do my best to be sensitive to what people need at the moment. It is not always easy but I try.

Greg: Yes, I too am thankful that God is finisher of my faith. If it werent for Him, I would be lost.

Thanks for your comments!

Susan

Apr 13, 2008 12:17 PM
Jason Crouch
Austin Texas Homes, LLC - Austin, TX
Broker - Austin Texas Real Estate (512-796-7653)
Susan - I think you already know my answer to this.  I share my life pretty openly, regardless of whether it is positive or not.  I do try to put a positive or funny spin on things that may be considered negative, but I like to consider myself "real".
Apr 13, 2008 01:48 PM
Susan Davis
Austin, TX
Excellence Advocate

Jason: And that is why I love ya brother! I just think I may share too much of myself.

Susan

Apr 13, 2008 01:52 PM
Alexander Harb
Knights Investing - Mesquite, TX
Dallas, Texas Real Estate Investing

Susan.....

There CAN be a limit....... BUT YOU have to set the limit.....

My life is pretty much an open book to everyone in the,
"Christianity and Real Estate" group......

BUT then again, I wouldn't be much of an example to follow
OR very much of a leader if everyone thought I was perfect
and unapproachable, right?

From --- The Founder of --- "Christianity and Real Estate"

\O/

 

Apr 13, 2008 06:54 PM
Susan Davis
Austin, TX
Excellence Advocate

Alexander: My philosophy is this, I have a life, that life has not been perfect, I have been delivered from many things by Gods grace, I struggle daily and have many trials and many triumphs, I believe that no matter what the circumstance, my sharing can touch someones life in some way. I hope that people will see my transparency as authentic and that they will be to relate with me on some level.

Thanks for the comment!

Susan

Apr 13, 2008 07:40 PM
Karen Hurst
RICOASTALLIVING.COM - Warwick, RI
Rhode Island Waterfront!

Susan,

This is an excellent question. From a "readers" point of view, I tend to appreciate honesty and always try to be helpful when someone seems to be reaching out for help. (In regards to both blogging and life). However, I have read and seen people be offending to others that have been looking for actual help.

From a writing point of view, I am very careful what I share, out on the Internet because anyone can read it. I have very close friends, both from my daily life and blogging life, with whom I can share my ups and downs without feeling like I am being judged and it alleviates the need to blog about it:)

Everyone is human, everyone has good and bad times, some more than others. Your example of your friend being shunned because of things that happened to her is right on target. Guess it all boils down to who you trust your feelings to. I think there are times in our lives that we "need" to share just to soften the tragedies.

I notice that the bloggers that "share" their feelings are also the most subscribed to!

Apr 14, 2008 12:09 AM
Tara Colquitt
Tara Colquitt, The Credit Woman, LLC - Philadelphia, PA
Credit Counselor

Susan: I personally share my life with others fully. But I wouldn't necessarily put it in writing in a blog. 8-)

My theory, how can I attract what I want in life by holding back? I am living my life out loud! 

Apr 21, 2008 04:55 PM