ASK AN AMBASSADOR: Sticks And Stones
"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words can never hurt me".
Harrrumph. Horse manure.
I've heard the statement made that words only have the power we give them, and last Monday the words I heard buckled my knees and stunned me to my core.
My dad calling at 10 in the morning can't ever be a good thing. My brother Joe was dead at age 50. Massive heart attack on his front porch as he left for work. Nothing they could do for him. A wife and two daughters (11 & 15) left behind.
Joe was a pastor currently between churches. The testimony from others at his memorial service last Friday was touching, affirming he'd made a huge difference to many and meant a lot to my parents and the rest of the family and friends in attendance.
I KNOW he is in a better place, but the heart and the mind haven't reconciled that knowledge yet and I have no idea how long it will take this wound to heal. It's taken me a week and a day to even get to the point where I could even attempt to write this post.
And here's the thing and the reason I write this post today, it's about THIS community. I've not made it a secret here that I work TWO jobs full-time. I'm an engineer for a Fortune 500 company and have been for 24+ years, and I've been helping Liz with real estate since 2004. I'm by nature a fairly private person and being in real estate/sales isn't a natural fit for my personality. I kept the news of my brother's death to just my manager and a co-worker, and frankly might not have even told them except for the need to travel out of state for my brother's service.
Who DID I tell? Rainers. At first just a couple via FB messages, then another group that I interact with daily. Rain friends of mine that I've mostly met in person. People that I'd have never met without this community. People that I trust, that help me learn, help me blow off steam in private, support me as I shed tears.
Then I shared with some of the other Ambassadors. For the most part Ambassadors are people I've never met, but many of them I consider true friends. The texts, emails, FB messages and phone calls of sincere support followed shortly and are appreciated beyond anything I can readily express.
The thing about buying into this community, truly understanding what this place is about, is it comes with that kind of support when you need it. When you've been kicked hard and fallen down, there are kind people here that will reach out to help you up. I know that ANYTHING I need I could ask for and there wouldn't be any hesitation. When I needed professional advice on how to help my sister-in-law, Rainers were there for me.
It doesn't mean we're ALL going to get along. Fact is we're going to have differences of opinion, sometimes pretty strongly. We're family and those that miss that are missing what is perhaps the best part of the Rain.
I have a passion for this community and sometimes I have to REALLY think hard about whether to respond or not to a post or comment, and if I choose to respond, the words to pick to do so. I'm a strong believer in having a RATIONAL, CIVIL discussion (and sometimes my twisted humor will interject). And that means sometimes my responses might be a bit on the "long" side. That's my nature, analyze, dissect, lay out response, click submit.
I don't think having an Ambassador badge makes me a special class of AR citizen, it just means I have certain responsibilities and obligations to the community that I take seriously. And it also means I hit delete a lot if I don't think what I'm writing in a post or a comment fits my responsibilities as an Ambassador for this community.
It is difficult for me to stay totally silent because I do believe that if left unchallenged that negativity can become infectious. Destructive vs. constructive criticism, the first is NOT good, the other is welcome, even when it's uncomfortable. We become who we associate with, and a friend of mine from Ghana has a saying "Silence is acceptance".
That's not saying that I think everything in the Rain is perfect. There are glitches, there is room for platform improvement, maybe everyone in the Rain doesn't always uphold the standards of the community. It's complicated, just like the rest of our lives.
But it also means that I will periodically feel the need to ask questions and have frank conversations. And if it becomes apparent that a rational, civil discussion isn't going to happen, then at least I know I tried & hopefully someone else will have success where I failed.
Relationships are the lifeblood of this community. I don't seek to burn bridges. I put in a lot of hours into this community each week (way too many if you ask a certain person I'm married to) & I want this community to thrive long after I've punched my keyboard for the last time. So if I'm doing anything to cause damage, you can know it's not by intent. Mea culpa.
Until next Tuesday, just Ask An Ambassador if you need help!
Bill
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