Losing "Control" can mean Taking Control

By
Real Estate Agent with EXP Realty 414-525-0563 57026-90 Broker

 When a part of life is just not lke it was...not like someone wishes....major changes shift life plans into another gear, different people respond differently.  gear

    Sometimes as the result of a health issue, mobility can be restricted...temporarily or permanently.  Divorce can mean having to sell the house a family has called home for as long as they have been a family.

  linus  The security of knowing that there was a spouse, neighbor, friend or family member to depend on may have been taken away when "life happens."

   As Real Estate agents....we need to recognize that there are times when even the strongest people have to take the time to re-group and the fuss made over what time the showing is...the inspection that can't interrupt a meal...the closing that is not convenient...are all "control attempters" that people grab when they feel they are sliding down the slippery slope of loss of control.
    How can we help ?   Find new things that CAN  be controlled...do what you can to make moving to the new place more pleasurable...the things that can be done to the new place to "make it their own" from paint colors to furniture choices...the advantages of a new location...emphasize the positive of the life changing experience.

     Life is about change...not always in the ways and at the time each of would choose to have things happen. Being a Realtor means more than buying or selling a house that someone will or has called home...it is a life changing experience...

 happily ever after  If you or anyone you know is making a "housing transition" selling or buying in southeastern Wisconsin...call the Hansons, we are honored to make the next "happily ever after" the very best it can be.

Posted by

Sally K. & David L. Hanson, ABR, CDPE, CSS, e-Pro,ILHM, REDS


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Ambassador
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Debbie Reynolds
Platinum Properties - Clarksville, TN
Your Dedicated Clarksville TN Real Estate Agent

If we take control of the things we can and leave the others alone, there would be lots less stress in our lives. This is a good post to read and share.

Sep 21, 2015 01:16 AM #16
Rainmaker
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Sharon Tara
Sharon Tara Transformations - Portsmouth, NH
New Hampshire Home Stager

This is a beautiful insight that I don't think many agents have....such understanding and compassion is the sign of a true professional who wishes the best for their clients! 

Real estate isn't the only place to apply this....whenever a person is being "difficult" it's important to remember that we each have our own issues we are dealing with and maybe their issue is getting the best of them at that moment!

Sep 21, 2015 03:02 AM #17
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Bob Crane
Woodland Management Service / Woodland Real Estate, Keller Williams Fox Cities - Stevens Point, WI
Forestland Experts! 715-204-9671

Great post Sally, you never know when your life will change, good to know that you and David are there to help people through these changes.

Sep 21, 2015 08:11 AM #18
Rainmaker
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Lisa Von Domek
Lisa Von Domek Team - Dallas, TX
....Experience Isn't Expensive.... It's Priceless!

Hello Sally K. & David L. Hanson 

Great post as the only constant in life is change!  

Sep 21, 2015 09:46 AM #19
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Kathy Streib
Room Service Home Staging - Delray Beach, FL
Home Stager - Palm Beach County,FL -561-914-6224

Sally and David- there are so many things I love about your post.  Compassion is at the heart of your post.  When changes in our lives occur, what we miss is the feeling of a lack of control.  

Sep 21, 2015 10:18 AM #20
Rainmaker
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Jay Markanich
Jay Markanich Real Estate Inspections, LLC - Bristow, VA
Home Inspector - servicing all Northern Virginia

This is a wonderful blog, beginning with the title.  Life is action and reaction.

Thanks for the great wisdom.

Sep 21, 2015 11:22 PM #21
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Kathy Streib
Room Service Home Staging - Delray Beach, FL
Home Stager - Palm Beach County,FL -561-914-6224

 

                  Thank you Sally K. & David L. Hanson for my Ah-ha moment. 

Sep 26, 2015 11:13 AM #22
Rainmaker
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Wayne Martin
Wayne M Martin - Chicago, IL
Real Estate Broker - Retired

Sally and David, hard not to recognize the emotional side of the transaction but we sometimes ignore it! Enjoy your day!

Sep 26, 2015 09:52 PM #23
Rainmaker
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Debbie Gartner
The Flooring Girl - White Plains, NY
The Flooring Girl & Blog Stylist -Dynamo Marketers

Oh yes, you guys ooze compassion, and you really need to in this business.

Sep 26, 2015 11:27 PM #24
Rainmaker
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Kat Palmiotti
406-270-3667, kat@thehousekat.com, Broker, Blackstone Realty Group - brokered by eXp Realty - Kalispell, MT
The House Kat

Buying and selling homes is always as a result of some sort of transition, some welcomed, and some not. Your caring about all transitions is evident!

Sep 27, 2015 01:12 AM #25
Rainmaker
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Nicole Doty - Gilbert Real Estate Expert
Zion Realty - Gilbert, AZ
Broker/Owner of Zion Realty ZionRealtyAZ.com

Changes in life can throw people off balance and they do and say things they normally wouldn't do. We have to remain professional and willing to help in whatever way we can with our clients changing life. 

Sep 27, 2015 01:19 AM #26
Rainmaker
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Marte Cliff
Marte Cliff Copywriting - Priest River, ID
Your real estate writer

Compassion, empathy, understanding - all valuable attributes for an agent, and so sadly lacking in some. 

Sep 27, 2015 04:07 AM #27
Rainmaker
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Mark Don McInnes, Sandpoint
Sandpoint, ID
North Idaho Real Estate - 208-255.6227

Good morning Sally.  I come by way of Kathy Streib .  We all know change is something we need live with and much of the time good.  As you state it can sometimes be devistating and we need be in tune with those feelings.  At least repectful of them.  Mark

Sep 27, 2015 04:40 AM #28
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Gayle Rich-Boxman Fishhawk Lake Real Estate
John L Scott Market Center - Birkenfeld, OR
"Your Local Expert!" 503-755-2905

I am heeding these words myself, Hanson family, as I am going through a HUGE transition, and much of it has been spent in letting go of so many precious things in my life....I think that you have to face your emotions with a degree of acceptance, and allow the angst, but don't hold onto it tenaciously, simply allow it, and let it flow by not pushing back or pushing it down, as it will only resurface in some other manner. It has its own energy and stepping aside and letting it go past you is a gentle way to deal with it, by "losing control" you gain it back again...beautifully done and thanks also goes to our dear pal, 

Kathy Streib for putting a shining light on this. 

Sep 27, 2015 06:18 AM #29
Rainer
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Shirley Coomer
Keller Williams Realty Sonoran Living - Phoenix, AZ
Realtor, Keller Williams Realty, Phoenix Az

Hello, great insight as to why people may behave they way they do (especially when you see a different side of them with the sale of a house).  I have often said Realtors are also counselors and peace makers. Realtors do much more than sell houses. The reason for a sale can be unhappy and traumatic.  Sometimes the amount of listening and understanding that goes into a transaction supersedes the work of transaction itself.

Sep 27, 2015 06:30 AM #30
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Praful Thakkar
LAER Realty Partners - Andover, MA
Andover, MA: Andover Luxury Homes For Sale

Sally K. & David L. Hanson so right - life is all about change. Losing control NOW means taking control of the future.

Sep 27, 2015 02:54 PM #31
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Bill Roberts
Brooks and Dunphy Real Estate - Oceanside, CA
"Baby Boomer" Retirement Planner

Ah jeez Sally K. & David L. Hanson It is all I can do to complete a transaction without getting involved in the "why" they are selling.

Bill Roberts

Sep 27, 2015 11:53 PM #32
Rainmaker
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Les & Sarah Oswald
Realty One Group - Eastvale, CA
Broker, Realtor and Investor

Very timing post for me, as I am fighting losing control in order to gain control. When a rug is pulled from under me after years of care and love, one becomes lost and hopelessness sets in. The constant thought of what if, or how come, or why me fills every crevice of my awaken life. Life has its up and downs. Been stuck in the valley for the last year or so. What gives me hope is knowing that there is light above the valley and I just need to figure out how to climb out or dig myself out little by little. 

As a realtor, we all need to realize that there is always a reason behind every transaction that we complete. Whether it is a happy or not so joyous occasion, we must be understanding and compassionate. For behind the smile, a pool of tears might be weighing them down. 

Sep 28, 2015 02:24 AM #33
Rainmaker
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Carla Muss-Jacobs, RETIRED
RETIRED / State License is Inactive - Portland, OR

Life happens . . . and when people are rolling in the deep, they need to rely on professionals.  I know that you would never take advantage of that.  It says a lot about your characters!  

Sep 28, 2015 04:15 AM #34
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Jeff Dowler, CRS
Solutions Real Estate - Carlsbad, CA
The Southern California Relocation Dude

Sally K. & David L. Hanson 

What an wonderful, insightful post you've shared here. Words of wisdom to keep in mind with buyer and seller clients, but in life in general. You;ve made my morning. GLad I found this through Kathy Streib 's Sunday list of learnings

Jeff

Sep 28, 2015 09:47 PM #35
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