I read something a friend wrote this morning on Facebook. She wrote, "I love my life!!!!" with lots of exclamation points. You could just hear her energy come off that screen. I immediately thought, "Yes, I love my life too!" and then I thought of all the people I know who are waiting to be happy with their life "until." They won't be happy until they find the right partner, or lose the weight, or gain it. They will only be happy if (and only if) they had more hair or a flatter stomach. They would be happy if they had more money or a better job or nicer car or house or more clothes. They would be happy if, and not until....
I had a boss once who used to say, "It is what it is" and I hated that term because to me it sounded defeatist. We didn't get approved for a project but "oh well, it is what it is" instead of perhaps going back and readdressing issues and trying again. But now that I think about it, "it is what it is" could also mean, "now is now." We all are where we are at this specific point in time as a result of choices we have made and events we have experienced and emotions we have felt. We have made our own "now" and there is almost always something to be happy about. "Now is now" or "it is what it is" could mean we should embrace our moments, all of them. For example...
Right now I am hot and sweaty and achy and tired. I have a ton of work to do today and I'm feeling overwhelmed with the problems I'm going to have to resolve. My income hasn't been what I wanted it to be in the last few months, so I'm a little stressed about that. I've been dealing with my parents estate which has at times made me sad and frustrated. My home computer and network are giving me trouble, my home office needs some organization, people I need to call me back aren't calling me back, and I'm at my wits end about some of these things. BUT...... guess what!!!
I'm happy! Because of all that is not a reason to be miserable. In fact, when I really think about all those things I just listed, here's my truth.
I am hot and sweaty and achy and tired. Do you know how wonderful this is? I am a 55 year old woman who just ran and power walked four miles up and down hills on a brisk morning without too much huffing and puffing. And I did this only a few years after I broke my ankle. And I feel strong. My legs feel like iron and I bet I could have done double. I am truly happy that I'm still able to run and walk and do physical things. Yee ha.
I have a ton of work to do today. What a blessing for a self-employed independent contractor to be able to say she has a ton of work! I am BUSY. That makes me so happy because it means that even though income has been a bit slow recently, it's coming. And I need to focus on the end result and stay busy. This is great news for me and makes me smile.
My computer and network are giving me trouble. I just spent about 15 minutes trying to get online. I had to test all my connections, and make sure I didn't accidentally hit the "wifi" button on my computer, and I unplugged and plugged things in and out, and I fixed it. And I'm thrilled about that because I have absorbed so much knowledge about computers, both hardware and software, that I'm able to fix things. I'm jokingly called the house computer tech. I love that stuff. I've written and tested programs in the past, and learned every new software package I could get my hands on. Learning something new or figuring something out actually makes me happy. Yeeha.
People aren't calling me back and I'm frustrated. These are all temporary problems. Eventually I'll get the answers I need and in the interim, I'll work on other projects and by the end of the day, I'll have checked off a bunch of stuff and that will make me even happier.
I'm dealing with my parents estate. Of course I am not happy that my parents are no longer here, but I am happy I knew them and had them in my life. I'm happy they are with each other again right now. And I am happy I am organized and knowledgeable enough to be able to take care of their things in a way they would have approved of. Some of the things we found after their deaths have been simply wonderful -- photos of us as children, journal entries, records of our family camping trips. Those findings brought me joy. I am also learning a lot about what the challenges can be after the death of a parent, lessons that could help me be even more empathetic and kind when dealing with my clients.
Wherever we are in our lives right now is where we are. We will never get this day or hour or even this second back. So making a personal decision to find something to be happy about can make such a difference in how our day goes, and quite frankly, how our life goes.
I've decided that I am happy with this moment in time. Are you?