What Do People See When They Look AT You?

By
Real Estate Agent SL3287291

Too often we think that communication is limited to when we speak.

In fact people are watching us and our body language and are forming opinions about who we are.

You may be speaking and yet you are communicating non-verbally. What does this photo say to you? What is this person's attitude?

 

We may be talking on the phone, but others are watching us. We may be frustrated with the person on the phone and roll our eyes, or throw our hands up. We may even throw a pencil. What are we communicating to those who are watching us?

People watch us all the time and they are forming opinions about what kind of a person we are. They are trying to decide if they want to work with us, can they trust us.

 

If they see some of our actions as we are engage with others, do they wonder if we will treat them the same?

It can make a big difference if we become aware of our non-verbal communications. Ask yourself: What do other people see when they watch me?

Comments (18)

Anna Banana Kruchten CRS, CRB, Phoenix Broker
HomeSmart Real Estate BR030809000 - Phoenix, AZ
602-380-4886

John oh so true - people are watching and taking note.  Recently I had an interesting conversation with a gal that was looking for a job. I was interested at first until we started talking about her  old boss. All she did was frown when she talked about her old boss and really didn't have much to say that was good but rather what didn't work . That was a sign.

Jun 15, 2016 06:09 AM
Beth Atalay
Cam Realty and Property Management - Clermont, FL
Cam Realty of Clermont FL

John, thanks to social media, it's not that difficult to learn about others. You're so right, eyes are on us all the time, that goes for every individual.

Jun 15, 2016 06:11 AM
John Wiley
Fort Myers, FL
Lee County, FL, ECO Broker, GRI, SRES,GREEN,PSA

Anna Banana Kruchten I am always amazed at people who interview for a job.

Watching their body language is often very telling.

Thanks for your contribution to the conversation.

Jun 15, 2016 06:14 AM
John Wiley
Fort Myers, FL
Lee County, FL, ECO Broker, GRI, SRES,GREEN,PSA

Beth Atalay social media tells people more than we can imagine. I am shocked at what some people post as it does not reflect the image I had of them. And that stays out there for many to see.

Thanks for sharing.

Jun 15, 2016 06:16 AM
Susan Laxson CRS
Palm Properties - La Quinta, CA
Local Knowledge & Global Network

John, excellent observation and I do it all the time. I think I am a natural editor, always finding ways to improve my surroundings and at times, even people's mannerisms and body langugage (silently). I think most of us are often evaluating others. Hope to read more of your observations and posts!

Jun 15, 2016 06:30 AM
John Wiley
Fort Myers, FL
Lee County, FL, ECO Broker, GRI, SRES,GREEN,PSA

Susan Laxson We all Listen by Looking because people are always talking with their bodies. That is how we get our first impressions. But as we observe a person the impression will often change.

Thanks for your comments.

Jun 15, 2016 06:34 AM
Roy Kelley
Realty Group Referrals - Gaithersburg, MD

This is a good question and the answers may be difficult.

Jun 15, 2016 06:35 AM
John Wiley
Fort Myers, FL
Lee County, FL, ECO Broker, GRI, SRES,GREEN,PSA

Roy Kelley you are correct. It is not easy to be honest enough with our selves to answer these questions. 

Thanks for commenting.

Jun 15, 2016 06:37 AM
Patricia Kennedy
RLAH Real Estate - Washington, DC
Home in the Capital

John, you are so right.  Body language isn't just for the person we are speaking to!

Jun 15, 2016 12:12 PM
Kathy Streib
Room Service Home Staging - Delray Beach, FL
Home Stager - Palm Beach County,FL -561-914-6224

John- body language is indeed important.  Leaning forward when listening to someone can show you're interested in what they have to say.  Or sitting back with your arms folded says something very different. 

Jun 15, 2016 01:30 PM
John Wiley
Fort Myers, FL
Lee County, FL, ECO Broker, GRI, SRES,GREEN,PSA

Patricia Kennedy there are so many eyes on us and many we are not even aware of.

Thanks for your comment

Jun 15, 2016 10:29 PM
John Wiley
Fort Myers, FL
Lee County, FL, ECO Broker, GRI, SRES,GREEN,PSA

Kathy Streib Your illustration is good. Body language does convey a message about us.

Jun 15, 2016 10:31 PM
Sally K. & David L. Hanson
EXP Realty 414-525-0563 - Brookfield, WI
WI Real Estate Agents - Luxury - Divorce

Body language from the eyebows down is important in communication.

Jun 18, 2016 08:57 PM
John Wiley
Fort Myers, FL
Lee County, FL, ECO Broker, GRI, SRES,GREEN,PSA

Sally K. & David L. Hanson you nailed it Sally. Would be amazed at what signals our body is sending out to others.

Thanks

Jun 18, 2016 11:40 PM
Grant Schneider
Performance Development Strategies - Armonk, NY
Your Coach Helping You Create Successful Outcomes

Good Morning John - non verbal communication is more than 70%.  What people watch speaks much louder than what we say.

Jun 21, 2016 02:14 AM
John Wiley
Fort Myers, FL
Lee County, FL, ECO Broker, GRI, SRES,GREEN,PSA

Grant Schneider I am in agreement with you. People are watching and you are talking.

Thanks for your great comments.

Jun 21, 2016 02:20 AM
Patricia Feager, MBA, CRS, GRI,MRP
DFW FINE PROPERTIES - Flower Mound, TX
Selling Homes Changing Lives

John Wiley - Even though this post was written some time ago, it's very timely for me. For some strange coincidence, I turned on the TV yesterday and four women were discussing this topic. One lady accused her co-worker of always having a mean look on her face and for that reason, she was always afraid to say something for fear the other didn't like her. The other woman was taken aback! She really liked this other woman and wasn't even aware of how she looked to other people. Then she explained, she grew up in a tough neighborhood. She was a happy little girl, but her mother told her to quit smiling and being so happy all the time or other people would take advantage of her or hurt her. Tears, almost swelled up, as she told the story. She had no idea that the behavior was so engrained. Then she realized, it was disrupting her relationships with other people.

Mar 29, 2017 09:32 PM
John Wiley
Fort Myers, FL
Lee County, FL, ECO Broker, GRI, SRES,GREEN,PSA

Patricia Feager thank you so much for that great share. It was a touching story.

Mar 30, 2017 05:56 AM