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DROP YOUR BAT AT HOME...Fran's Friday Forum...!!!

By
Title Insurance with Patriot Land Transfer, Inc.

Lest you be misled by the title, this post has nothing to do with baseball...well...just a little...!!!

 


Let me explain...
About 4 years ago we decided to roof over and completely screen in our pressure treated rear deck...with one door from our family room to enter the deck, and one door on the deck to exit to the back yard...bear with me, these details are important...WELL...

 

Last night at the Gaspari residence under the darkness of late evening on that same deck is where ALL THE ACTION BEGAN...

 

While sitting in my study, and about to doze off, I was excitedly awakened by my six foot two son, JUSTIN, who announced THE NEWS that while engaged in a game of solitaire on that same back deck a BAT FLEW RIGHT BY HIS NOSE...

 

Before I had a chance to educate him about all I knew to handle such an intrusion (and guns did not even come into play), he and my other six foot two son, JOSH took up their OWN ARMS OF CHOICE...A BROOM, A LONG TELESCOPING POLE, AND AN OLD LITTLE LEAGUE BASEBALL GLOVE...OH...AND A BEACH TOWEL...WELL...

 

For the next half hour or so we were entertained by the HIJINKS ensuing on the back deck...meanwhile the bat, probably scared out of its BATWITS survived REPEATED LUNGES, BROOM SWATS, TOWEL SUFFOCATIONS, CARDBOARD BOX TRAPS...While I stared out of the locked family room door, My wife, BENITA, watched from the kitchen window, my daughter, ASHLEY, was peering out from the bedroom...AND...my other daughter, EMILY, attempted to photograph with her cell phone from the rear yard the entire episode (ready to run at a moment’s notice)...NOW THIS STORY HAS A VALIANT AND WONDERFUL ENDING:

 

IT TOOK MY WIFE BENITA AND HER INGENUITY TO FIGURE OUT A QUICK AND HUMANE AND SIMPLE SOLUTION TO THE BAT PROBLEM...She remembered a MESH DUFFLE BAG she had bought for our youngest son, JARED...It was still in its unused, and unopened package...She slowly and took the MESH BAG out of its container, and carefully PLACED THE BAG OPENING OVER THE BAT WHO HAD DECIDED TO REST AND CLING TO THE SCREEN OF THE DECK...THE BAT then gently fell into the confines of the mesh bag...

 

WITHOUT ‘BATTING’ an eye our ‘BAT LADY’ walked the meshed BAT about ten steps outside and released the unhurt creature into the safe open air enabling him to join his comrades in eating bugs and mosquitos...AND THE TWO BOYS BOWED TO THEIR MOTHER GLOVE AND POLE IN HAND...AND CROWNED HER BAT LADY SUPREME...WHILE I HIGH FIVED THE BAT QUEEN...!!! And we lived happily ever after...!!!

 

HAVE A GREAT 4TH OF JULY HOLIDAY AND PRAY FOR GOD TO BLESS AMERICA...!!!

 

 

 

Comments (2)

Mike Frazier
Carousel Realty of Dyer County - Dyersburg, TN
Northwest Tennessee Realtor

Fran, sounds like everyone in your household is a little "batty".

Jul 02, 2016 01:17 PM
Fran Gaspari
Patriot Land Transfer, Inc. - Limerick, PA
"The Title Man" - Title Insurance - PA & NJ

Mike,

You know us pretty well...!!!

Thanks,   Fran

 

Jul 02, 2016 02:44 PM