Remove the M and the deal will go much smoother.

Reblogger Debbie Reynolds
Real Estate Agent with Platinum Properties TN Broker: 208698

Working together is the way to success in the real estate industry. Treat people with respect and kindness and you will go far.

Original content by Andrea Swiedler Licensed in Connecticut

unemotional real estateYears ago I was opening a listing of mine for an agent to show to his buyer. The house had an alarm, and it is my custom never to give out the alarm code to someone else. It is not always convenient, but it is the right thing for me to do. Other agents give out the codes, but I don't even like to take them. I want the alarm off when I get to the house. Doesn't always work that way, but that is what I prefer. (This is not a judgment on how others do business, only how I handle my listings that are alarmed.)

Anyway, back to the agent I met that day. He arrived and loudly announced that he was going to sell this house. That was even before his client arrived. Funny thing is, he did, and to that buyer. But what I found most interesting is that he made a statement that has stuck in my head all these years.


It did take me by surprise, and I had to think about it for a few. It fit in my idea of how life should be. We are not competing, we should be working together for a common goal! 

The deal went off without a hitch. Everyone was happy, the agent was a dream to work with. My seller was happy with his price, the buyer was happy with the price. I was happy, the buyers agent was happy, we were all just HAPPY!

That missing "M" spoke volumes. 

When I get an offer in on one of my listings, I look at it as a great opportunity. Here is my seller, who wants to sell, here I am, I want to sell it for my client. Along comes a buyer and an agent who have the same goal in mind, they want the house to sell too! There is one tiny difference though, I admit that. My seller wants to get the best price possible for the house and it is my job to do that. And the buyer also wants to purchase the house for the best price possible and that job falls to their agent. 

Opposite and yet not. All are on the same page, different paragraph. We are not competing, we are working together to try and accomplish the goal. 

Antagonizing, bullying, name calling,, sarcasm, creating obstacles, these should not have a place in a real estate deal. And I'm not talking about our clients! I can remember one agent who wholeheartedly believed it was duty, perhaps even protocol, to beat the other agent up as hard as possible to get the best price for the client. As agents we are the professionals and should not entertain that type of behavior at all. 

Clients can become frustrated. I get that. After all, it is their money, their home, their future on the line in a real estate deal. And frustrations can run high. Frustration can cause people to behave in a manner they might not otherwise display. I work hard at letting that roll off my back. And never discussing the event after the fact. 

selling real estateRemaining calm is ultra important, showing respect to all concerned is key. I think we all want respect in one form or another. 

So take the "M" out of competitor and let's all get to the finish line together. Find a mutually agreeable price or move on to another home, another buyer, another seller, whichever it appropriate to your side of the transaction. 


Co-petition, it works so much better at keeping people calm in a transaction. 



Andrea Swiedler, Realtor, Southern Litchfield County Real Estate

2017 President, Greater New Milford Board of Realtors

2017 Connecticut Magazine 5 Star Realtor

whats my home worth 

 Search homes for sale in Litchfield County, CT.


Berkshire Hathaway HomeServices New England Properties

Litchfield County Regional Office, 27 Main Street, New Milford, CT 06776


© Andrea Swiedler 2009 - 2016

 Always do right. This will gratify some people and astonish the rest. - Mark Twain


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Roy Kelley
Realty Group Referrals - Gaithersburg, MD
Roy and Dolores Kelley Photographs

This is an excellent selection for a reblog and important advice to share.

Nov 15, 2016 08:16 PM #1
Sally K. & David L. Hanson
EXP Realty 414-525-0563 - Brookfield, WI
WI Realtors - Luxury - Divorce

It should be the reason we call other agents Co-brokes....and sometimes is not.

Nov 15, 2016 08:36 PM #2
Gabe Sanders
Real Estate of Florida specializing in Martin County Residential Homes, Condos and Land Sales - Stuart, FL
Stuart Florida Real Estate

Thanks for the re-blog, Debbie.  If only more agents and customers felt this way.

Nov 15, 2016 08:56 PM #3
Wayne Martin
Wayne M Martin - Chicago, IL
Real Estate Broker

Good morning Debbie. An absolutely exccellent reblog! Thanks! Enjoy  your day!

Nov 15, 2016 09:21 PM #4
Lise Howe
Keller Williams Capital Properties - Washington, DC
Assoc. Broker and Attorney Licensed in DC, MD, VA,

I am glad that you reposted this - a very helpful attitude shifting post - I will keep it to share with other agents

Nov 15, 2016 09:23 PM #5
Grant Schneider
Performance Development Strategies - Armonk, NY
Your Coach Helping You Create Successful Outcomes

Good Morning Debbie - Andrea really wrote an engaging post here.  More should think like this.

Nov 15, 2016 10:43 PM #6
Kristin Johnston - REALTOR®
RE/MAX Realty Center - Waukesha, WI
Giving Back With Each Home Sold!

Another great know how to pick them!  Thanks!

Nov 15, 2016 11:02 PM #7
Amanda S. Davidson
Amanda Davidson Real Estate Group - Alexandria, VA
Alexandria Virginia Homes For Sale

Debbie, great re-blog. I'm glad you posted it because I had missed it. So true, I love it when everyone comes together as a team on a transaction. It's such a better experience for all involved.

Nov 16, 2016 03:35 AM #8
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Debbie Reynolds

Your Dedicated Clarksville TN Real Estate Agent
Clarksville and Real Estate are my specialities! May I help you?
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