Ask An Ambassador: Avoiding Headaches In The Rain & Elsewhere

Real Estate Agent with RE/MAX Elite 513.520.5305 SAL.2002007747

"God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,
Courage to change the things I can,
And wisdom to know the difference."  Reinhold Niebuhr

Most of us recognize this.  We've got it hanging in our home, or we know people that do.  It's a snippet from The Serenity Prayer  and understanding its meaning can take us from turmoil to peace. 

We never said it's easy to walk the path.

Let's face it.  We're not perfect.  Life's not perfect.  Paraphrasing Forrest Gump, "it happens".

A typical day consists of a mix of face to face interactions, emails, ActiveRain blogs, Q&A section, Facebook, etc.  Human interactions both close and distant.

What we all encounter is a series of problems, both our own and others.  Now I'll admit as an engineer I just MIGHT just be a bit empathy impaired :) 

My natural reaction is to want to SOLVE the problems, or (again periodically being tone deaf) to try to explain why the problem IS NOT really a problem without getting snarky or dropping a "Nice First World problem you got there bud!".

But there are some things I've learned that help avoid some headaches, some specific, others more general:

  • Don't put complete faith in the AR blog editor.  It is where I write my posts but I'll never hit Submit without first highlighting and doing a right click Copy.  I can't count the number of times this simple act has saved me from having a post completely wiped out.
  • Don't trust the AR autoscheduler.  I know for some it works, others it doesn't. If it's critical to have only ONE post go out, and at a specific time, I'd recommend keeping the process manual to avoid the mass autodump of everything you've got scheduled just in case the scheduling gremlins decide to have some fun. 
  • Learn who the prickly people are.  Not something I have to worry about with few exceptions in ActiveRain, but step into the wonderful world of Facebook and the floodgates are bursting with bad behavior.  Whether it's the real estate forums or the "mild" political discussions that quickly become heated, when your jaw is clenched, go back to the quote at the beginning.  Is this battle one that should be fought?  Is there any prayer that you're going to change a viewpoint?  I think mostly it's Irresistible Force vs. Immovable Object isn't it?  There ARE times to don the battle armor and wield the battle axe and defend what you believe in strongly.  Choose wisely.
  • Protect your time.  Time wasted in one place takes away from our daily 24 hour bucket, and before you know it you're stressed because you don't have time to do a MUST do. 
  • Practice your craft and be efficient.  Blogging is much easier for me now because I have my tools (picture sources, ideas, etc.).  Almost 3000 posts later it's second nature to blog.  Have systems in place for your real estate business so you don't have to reinvent the wheel with each transaction or lead.
  • Keep your eyes on your own paper.  My north of the border friend Susan Emo uses this one frequently.  Look, some things that happen in the Rain can be irritating if we choose to allow them to be (e.g. the 100 market reports posted in a row on Saturdays), but how we react to those things is our choice.  We can choose to get hopped up and red in the face or recognize we do not have direct control over the situation and adapt.  We're real estate agents, isn't adapting what we do for a living? 

Pet your puppy or kitty, take a few deep breaths and it might just be better. 

Accept.  Courage.  Wisdom.  

You got this!

Until next Tuesday, just Ask An Ambassador if you need help!

Bill of Liz and Bill aka BLiz


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Serving Warren County Ohio & Adjacent Areas


The Liz Spear Team of RE/MAX Elite
Elizabeth Spear, ABR, CRS, Ohio License SAL.2002007747

William (Bill) Spear, CRS, Ohio License SAL.2004011109  Kentucky 77938
Ask for us by name if you visit the office!

EHO Two locations: Lebanon & Mason, OH
Bill Direct:  513-520-5305
Liz Direct: 513-265-3004     
Fax: 866-302-8418


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Re-Blogged 2 times:

Re-Blogged By Re-Blogged At
  1. Tony and Suzanne Marriott, Associate Brokers 12/02/2016 05:06 AM
  2. Gabe Sanders 12/05/2016 11:30 PM
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Kathleen Daniels
KD Realty - 408.972.1822 - San Jose, CA
San Jose Homes for Sale-Probate & Trust Specialist

Bill, I agree with Alan May - you are a high point in the Rain.  As an engineer you may be empathy impaired - operative word there is "may" yet your grounded and logical ways are most appreciated by me.  Thank you.  

Nov 30, 2016 08:47 AM #33
Les & Sarah Oswald
Realty One Group - Eastvale, CA
Broker, Realtor and Investor

Your photo captured my interest. However, your words have given me hope.

Another outstanding blog. Wish we all could write as eloquently as you.

Nov 30, 2016 08:49 AM #34
Scott Godzyk
Godzyk Real Estate Services - Manchester, NH
One of Manchester NH's Leading Agents

The auto scheduler got me this week and upset some who frantically removed my posts from their group when it posted 6 blogs in a row. I think you hit every subject that we have seen the last week or so. The Saturday spammer and only missed yesterdays new visitor to q and a that attacked those who gave their oppinion that they didnt not agree with. The bottom line is you cant let things get to you, be here for positive things and you get positive results Liz and Bill Spear . 

Nov 30, 2016 09:08 AM #35
Ed Silva
RE/MAX Professionals, CT 203-206-0754 - Waterbury, CT
Central CT Real Estate Broker Serving all equally

This platform is nothing like it once was with the 'wild west mentality' and almost all of them are gone or have wizened up.

That photo compliments your message perfectly

Nov 30, 2016 10:00 AM #36
Liz and Bill Spear
RE/MAX Elite 513.520.5305 - Mason, OH
RE/MAX Elite Warren County OH (Cincinnati/Dayton)

Gabe, It's a challenge sometimes NOT to let things get to us.  Fortunately many of the hiccups here in the Rain either don't directly impact me (the autoscheduler), don't matter to me (points), or don't bother me (robobloggers).

Harry,  I'll see what I can do.

Margeret, We follow your words and live gets much, much better.

Lyn, I happened to know someone that fit the needs.  A win-win for my agent friend, the agent's seller, the community overall and hopefully in time we bring a new member into the fold.  The community modus operandi will be clearer in time to her and we'll avoid that type of spat.

Richie, Love watching the butterflies flit around our flower gardens.  Already looking forward to their return next spring.

Nick & Trudy, It's a hard lesson I think each of us have had to learn once or twice!

Kathleen, I do my best to stay level and logical and pick my "fights" carefully.  Even then I'll do everything I can to keep it civil on my part.  I'm not going to bring everyone around and not everyone will like me.  I can live with that.

Les & Sarah, Pixabay said that was Lake Tahoe.  I was looking for serenity and that picture did it for me :)

Scott, We're occasionally going to get bushwhacked by the AR gremlins, or people doing things we don't like.  Overall, this place is 99.99% positive for me personally and for our business.  It's why I'm back here every day without fail.



Nov 30, 2016 10:02 AM #37
Liz and Bill Spear
RE/MAX Elite 513.520.5305 - Mason, OH
RE/MAX Elite Warren County OH (Cincinnati/Dayton)

Ed, I know for some they miss the AR of old.  I appreciate the fact that for the most part this community knows when to have fun and when to be professional and walk away.  The few folks that don't are the outliers and they typically don't actively engage with the community.  While the AR guidelines don't specifically say "No TROLLS", that seems to be the way things work.  And the picture is Lake Tahoe, thanks to a contributor on Pixabay.   Loved the clarity of the water and the colors.  Haven't been there yet, perhaps someday I'll make it there.

Nov 30, 2016 10:05 AM #38
Jon Kolsky
Kolsky Realty & Management - Long Beach, CA
Licensed California Real Estate Broker

Liz and Bill Spear ~ love this post! So many on point topics within. We all need to be mindful that "stuff happens." There's going to be a lot of stuff that happens which is out of our control, and for which it is "we" need to keep calm and mind our own side of the street without getting red-faced. It does "us" no good to get red-faced, most importantly, it is a waste of time and energy

Nov 30, 2016 02:19 PM #39
Liz and Bill Spear
RE/MAX Elite 513.520.5305 - Mason, OH
RE/MAX Elite Warren County OH (Cincinnati/Dayton)

Jon, I have to be careful where I expend my "free" time, there's so little of it!

Nov 30, 2016 03:07 PM #40
Sandra Early
World Impact Real Estate - Destin, FL
Sandra Sells Castles In Paradise

I say this everyday...especially as I am in the process of going through a very difficult closing at this time and I have absolutely no control of...Thanks for sharing...

God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change,

Courage to change the things I can,And wisdom to know the difference."  Reinhold Niebuhr

Dec 01, 2016 07:08 AM #41
Liz and Bill Spear
RE/MAX Elite 513.520.5305 - Mason, OH
RE/MAX Elite Warren County OH (Cincinnati/Dayton)

Sandra, We do the best we can with the things that we can control.  The rest we just have to adapt to.

Dec 01, 2016 09:02 AM #42
Tony and Suzanne Marriott, Associate Brokers
Haven Express @ Keller Williams Arizona Realty - Scottsdale, AZ
Serving Scottsdale, Phoenix and Maricopa County AZ

Liz and Bill Spear "Don't put complete faith in the AR blog editor.  It is where I write my posts but I'll never hit Submit without first highlighting and doing a right click Copy.  I can't count the number of times this simple act has saved me from having a post completely wiped out."

Right on target - and - re-blog!

Dec 02, 2016 05:06 AM #43
Nina Hollander
Coldwell Banker Residential Brokerage - Charlotte, NC
Your Charlotte/Ballantyne/Waxhaw/Fort Mill Realtor

Great post, Bill and Liz. I had never thought of the right click and save "just in case" and will need to start doing that.

Dec 02, 2016 06:30 AM #44
Anne Corbin
Long and Foster - Lake Anna - Spotsylvania, VA
Serving Lake Anna & Central Virginia

I didn't know there was an autoscheduler! Will have to check that out this winter during my slow season and get some writing prepared in advance!

Dec 02, 2016 06:32 AM #45
Lottie Kendall
Compass - San Francisco, CA
Helping make your real estate dreams a reality

Good morning - disappearing posts don't happen often to me, but when they do, it's brutal. Save a draft, copy just in case, before publishing is very wise.


Dec 02, 2016 08:31 AM #46
Janice Zaltman
United Realty Group - Boca Raton, FL
South Florida Residential Real Estate

Hi Bill:  Amen! Had that saying with me all through school and in my first home away from home. Great points and as always wonderfully said. Have a great weekend!

Dec 02, 2016 06:13 PM #47
Praful Thakkar
LAER Realty Partners - Andover, MA
Andover, MA: Andover Luxury Homes For Sale

Like any other platform, Liz and Bill Spear - ActiveRain does have some limitations.

Though the best part is the benefit one can get from blogging here. So, count the blessings is one more thing I want to add to your list.

Dec 02, 2016 06:32 PM #48
Liz and Bill Spear
RE/MAX Elite 513.520.5305 - Mason, OH
RE/MAX Elite Warren County OH (Cincinnati/Dayton)

T&S, Thanks for the reblog!

Nina, It's a habit for me just to be safe.

Anne, It's there, but I've never used it.

Lottie, It stings to spend a half hour crafting a post just to have it go POOF.

Janice, Hope you have a great weekend too!  Getting chilly again here.  Just a couple of appointments (so far) for the weekend.

Praful, No doubt we are WAY ahead of where we were years ago as a platform.  It's stable, and we used to not be able to say that.

Dec 02, 2016 07:12 PM #49
Lisa Von Domek
Lisa Von Domek Team - Dallas, TX
....Experience Isn't Expensive.... It's Priceless!

Outstanding post Liz and Bill Spear glitches happen, frustrations occur, but overall playing in the Rain is worth the random issues.

Dec 06, 2016 10:35 AM #50
Liz and Bill Spear
RE/MAX Elite 513.520.5305 - Mason, OH
RE/MAX Elite Warren County OH (Cincinnati/Dayton)

Lisa, They do happen, just like they happen with real estate transactions.  That's part of the reason it baffles me when people get so bent out of shape about things that are relatively small speed bumps in our lives.

Dec 06, 2016 04:14 PM #51
Debe Maxwell, CRS | The Maxwell House Group | RE/MAX Executive | (704) 491-3310 - Charlotte, NC
Charlotte Homes for Sale - Charlotte Neighborhoods

That daily 24-hour bucket gets me every time!!  Sleep is typically the first place I go for time I need to make up and I know that's not good but, it is what it is! All excellent words of wisdom, Bill -  as always!

Dec 07, 2016 07:58 AM #52
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